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Thread: Is my toddler weaning himself?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Is my toddler weaning himself?

    I posted this on another board but maybe I will get a better response here!


    My son is now 23 months old and I am not quite sure if he is wanting to wean or not. I really, really don't want him to yet. We have had such a close relationship and it has been so rewarding nursing him for this long.

    Here is what is leading me to think he may want to wean....for the past couple of months, maybe only a select few times has he actually asked to nurse. I am always offering it to him now. He nurses 3 times per day. He nurses first thing in the morning, as soon as I get home from work and then right before bed. He sleeps through the night so he never nurses through the night any more. Each time he nurses...I offer it to him and it is more just part of our routine. But it has gotten to the point lately where if he is busy playing in the morning, and I need to leave for work...I have to pick him up and carry him over to me to get him to nurse and at first he resists and then he finally will nurse. I feel almost like I'm forcing him to nurse sometimes...and I so do not want to do that. Once he does start nursing he seems so content and then will often ask for the other side even.

    Does all of this mean he wants to wean? Or is it just because he is a curious, active toddler that doesn't want to miss anything so he doesn't want to take the time out to nurse...even though when he does, he does still actually enjoy it? I'm 4 months pregnant right now too if that matters...but this pattern seemed to be even before I got pregnant. I don't seem to have a lower supply yet from what I can tell when I express any milk.

    Last question...if I have been nursing him 3 times a day for months...and then I let him just nurse whenever he wants...it may then only be 1-2 times per day some days...but maybe back to 3 other days...won't that drastically effect my milk supply or at this point is that ok?

    Any advice would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!

    Angie

  2. #2

    Talking Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    First of all Hi!
    I just wanted to post, as I felt bad no one was responding to you mama!
    I nursed my 1st dd 21 months. I weaned her..rather quickly. I was not pg with #2 yet, but was very run down with Mono. And I will NOT wean like that again. She was not ready. But it sounds like he may we slowing down. Are you set on a certain time frame? He may have his own schedule. As long as he is nursing some..you'll make milk. My dd was down to 2-3 times a day. But when I weaned on our "All done nummies" day..I got so engorged and got a breast infection in my left boob. So believe me..you are making more than you think. Maybe relax and go with the flow and see what he does. Eventually..he will wean...you know this..so go with what he does!
    Hope that helps.
    JEN
    Happy Wife of 20 years to J~
    Mommy to DD E~ 9/22/04 BF 21 months
    Mommy to DD H~ 7/2/07 BF 27 months CD'd from 10 mos on!
    Mommy to DD A~ 7-14-10 All cloth, and Potty Trained at 2 1/2. Still Nursing!
    I grow an organic garden, homeschool, and really feel blessed to be a SAHM!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    866

    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    Hi there. My DS is almost 2 yrs old. The behavior sounds completely normal to me. They would much rather play than almost anything....changing a diaper is crazy times. Telling him breakfast, lunch or dinner is ready he whines that I am pulling him away from the toy of the hour. And when it comes to nursing I can not honestly say he ever regularly asked for it, but always wanted it.

    We are on a very simple schedule of nursing.... in the morning after I get him out of bed and dressed and before naptime. When DH is home on the weekends and can hear him making coffee in the morning, etc., he might say no nana, cover them up, and runs out of the room to say hi to DH... I think that at this age, so many things can be more important to them at that very moment....KWIM? I used to get upset that maybe he did not want it and was going to wean..but the next day he wants it just as much as he ever did. HTH
    Leslie- Momma to Aiden 02/28/06 AND Owen 2/28/08...What timing

    Older and wiser voices can always help you find the right path, if you are only willing to listen.--Jimmy Buffet


  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    332

    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    Hi, my DD is 21 months, she still asks a few times in the day and nurses a lot at night, so we're a in a different situation. I just wanted to say that it does not look like you're forcing your toddler to nurse, you are offering, and he is happy to latch on and feed and then change sides, so I would not worry about it. In fact, you are doing what is called child-led weaning, because you know he is really busy and forgets to ask, but he actually still enjoys it. If you were doing mother-led weaning, maybe he would have weaned already because you would not have offered and he may not have asked again. I would carry on offering, and I'm sure it'll be very clear to you when he actually does not want to nurse any more, which may or may not happen later during your pregnancy.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    52

    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    You aren't forcing him - you are just reminding him of what's on offer. I don't think he would latch on if he didn't want to (did you ever try to get him in a car seat, buggy, change his nappy etc etc when he didn't want to - what reaction did you get? Still think that you are forcing him to breast feed?).

    I think you should do what you want, ie carry on reminding - or not - depending on whether you want to or not

    If you decided not to remind him and he dropped a feed then I think your supply would drop to match it quite quickly. I went back to work and so feed morning and then 12 hours later (plus in the night). My supply just reduced to match. In fact I feed i the day at weekends and on holiday and it seems to adjust to that as well. I wonder if it may adjust more easily for mums who have been feeding for a longer time.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    1,197

    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    I agree that offering is not forcing. My son doesn't even ask for water if I don't offer it. He is just soooo busy with all the errands he is running

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    Thank you all so much! You have all really helped and have made me feel a lot better. He is such an active toddler and I just think he doesn't want to skip a beat. Actually this passed week he has been nursing even better and all I have to do is ask him which side he wants (instead of if he wants to nurse) and he always points to the left side and latches right on. So he doesn't seem ready to wean quite yet and I'm grateful for that because I'm not ready!

    Thanks again!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    Default Re: Is my toddler weaning himself?

    I would say keep offering. The fact that he is content and asks for the other side tells me he was just distracted, not necessarily "weaning". As for the number of times per day fluctuating, I think your body will adjust. I just quit pumping at work recently, and I am not overly full during the day, but still fine to nurse every few hours when I am home with DD. HTH!

    L e i l a, married to hubby, loving our "bock-ee" kinda girl, 6.23.06
    Learn about the prepuce before you have a boy.
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