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Thread: Night feeds at 9 months old....

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    568

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Quote Originally Posted by CJMommy View Post
    You're welcome! I did rule out all other causes and only tried when it was really apparent that he just wanted to say "hi" to Mommy 4 times a night It's been the greatest thing I've done - both for him and me. Last night was the 3rd night in a row that he slept all the way through without even stirring, so now I know it's not a fluke he slept those other two nights. I'm not opposed to letting baby cry it out after 7 or 8 months, but it would have NEVER worked with my child. He gets so revved up and frantic when he cries that it just would have been counter-productive. So I had to find a more soothing way to "teach" him that night is for sleeping. Have patience, it takes more than a few nights, but it's worth it in the end. He knows I'll come to him if he cries, but I think now he values the sleep more than the peek at Mommy

    Good luck!

    I've not read the book, but we're following the same path as you. It's good to know that it is working for you! Sometimes you have one bad night and you're convinced it's destined to fail!!
    Claire, Mum to Archie, 5 and Jack, almost 3! Number 3 on the way!

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    93

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    You know, the book was more about how to get them to fall asleep on their own when you put them to bed initially. We didn't have that problem; our problem was primarily waking during the night. But she did discuss night wakings, and some of the problems of falling asleep initially also could contribute to troubles falling back to sleep during the night, so I applied those tips. In our case, it was a matter of disassociating nursing with sleep. I love to nurse him before bed at night, but for those few days of "training", I nursed him before I gave him a bath and put him to bed instead of after, and then when he woke during the night would do the patting thing. It worked, and a few nights into it, once he realized he was not going to be nursed each time he woke, I went back to nursing him right before he went to sleep and it didn't ruin anything we'd accomplished. I think it was just a matter of him realizing waking did not = nursing, and now he's sleeping like a champ. I also only started all of this "training" once he was waking and just "nibbling" (drinking for about 2 minutes and falling asleep at the breast). That was so frustrating! Anyway, hang in there. It's the ONLY thing that's worked for us and he is MUCH happier (as am I!) with more sleep. My firstborn was a great sleeper, so I've felt like a first-time mom through all of this. He keeps me on my toes, that's for sure!

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    5

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Hi Everyone

    Well I attempted to just pat/stroke & shush her last night and failed miserably! she got very upset and hit her head on the side of the cot, so I had to give her a cuddle. I tryed rocking her while standing up but she kept pulling my hair & getting very angry. We ended up nursing in bed again 3 times.....

    I have just found the book on Amazon and have bought it! Hopefully it will help.

    I'm not sure how much attention I'm suppose to give Lola when she wakes, the problem is with 3 other children asleep, its hard to let her cry too loudly, although they don't wake very easily. I am the same though, I've never had sleep problems before, my other girls slept through from a few weeks old & they had dummies, which made night wakings abit easier, but I didn't manage to breastfeed them, so this is all new to me, but I wouldn't change it for anything.

    Will try again tonight x

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    93

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Quote Originally Posted by bloomymum View Post
    Hi Everyone

    Well I attempted to just pat/stroke & shush her last night and failed miserably! she got very upset and hit her head on the side of the cot, so I had to give her a cuddle. I tryed rocking her while standing up but she kept pulling my hair & getting very angry. We ended up nursing in bed again 3 times.....

    x
    The thing that she discusses in the book is that there will be SOME crying, but it's much different than letting baby cry it out alone. You are right there. Sometimes that's harder, and in the case of my son, it made the situation worse when he could see me, so I patted him for awhile, shushed him, and then left. He'd cry for a few minutes after I left, but then would stop, and it was more like whining than crying. If I stayed in the room (I've tried it this way) he'll keep crying as long as I'm there. I felt like I was almost teasing him - see the breast, but you can't have it! If I did give in and nurse him (have also done that many times in the past!) he would suck for two minutes and then fall asleep, so I knew it was his sleep drug! He really only cried, and very little, the first night. The next night he barely cried at all, and the next few nights he'd wake up, but just whine and when I went in to pat him, he'd fall instantly asleep. And then after that, he'd stir and just go back asleep! Now he just sleeps. It's VERY gradual. There's no instant gratification with this system.

    I also have a 3-year old whose room is right next to his, with very thin walls. I put a big fan in her room and it helps muffle the noise. She's heard him a couple times, but she falls right back to sleep after I tell her everything's fine. I figured for that week we were all going to lose some sleep, but now no one's waking up, so it was worth it.

    Keep me posted on how it goes! Have patience, that's the biggest thing. I really, really thought nothing would work with my son. He's very stubborn and I've tried just about everything else...

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    24

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Can fully sympathize as my 9 1/2 month who finally went off a strike ! <: now wants to feed every 1 1/2 to 2 hours! All night long!
    And it is nice to know that this happens. For the sake of parents i think some 'training' may not be a bad thing, but biologically speaking, i think every 2 hours is probably closer to reality: certainly spaces pregancies better!

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    568

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    I am continuing to watch with interest!! We have had two really bad nights with Jack. Don't know whether there's some more teething going on, or whether he's a little unwell or just working on crawling in his sleep! Either way, it's killing me!! DH seems to be able to sleep through all the crying that's going on, and so far DS1 hasn't woken up. But DS2 is just inconsolable, wide awake, wants to get up. Takes ages to settle him off again. So keep us updated bloomy mum!!!
    Claire, Mum to Archie, 5 and Jack, almost 3! Number 3 on the way!

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    528

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Not to take over the thread but what do you do if they keep waking up after you have stopped feeding at night. My dh goes in since she will try and bf if I go but she still wakes up. I guess I thought that once she realized it wasn't worth it, she would stay asleep. Isn't that what you all are saying should happen by not feeding and just soothing and patting them, or do I have it wrong?
    Mom to Abigail, born May 3rd, 2007 (self-weaned at 27 mths) and Charlotte, born Nov. 24th, 2009. Both reflux babies and EBF. Charlotte weighs 31 lbs at 26 mths.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
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    568

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Quote Originally Posted by abaker89 View Post
    Not to take over the thread but what do you do if they keep waking up after you have stopped feeding at night. My dh goes in since she will try and bf if I go but she still wakes up. I guess I thought that once she realized it wasn't worth it, she would stay asleep. Isn't that what you all are saying should happen by not feeding and just soothing and patting them, or do I have it wrong?
    No, you have it right, that's exactly what we're saying. I think we need them to learn that they don't need to BF just because they wake in the night. Obviously if they're waking and nursing properly then it's a different story. DS will have a full on temper for ages, screaming and wriggling, and will end up needing to nurse properly cos he gets himself in such a state. Sort of contradicts the whole idea really!! Our problem IMO is that DS really still depends on a good nursing session to fall asleep, so when he does wake in the night it's just all wrong for him. We need to equip him with the tools to be able to go to sleep in the first place before we get past the night waking thing. I think so anyway. I am so sleep deprived I just don't know anymore!!!
    Tonight my specific aim was to get DS to fall asleep without nursing or too much interference. It worked, which amazed me!! So tonight I have to be ready with soothing tools (and my breasty tools tucked away in my PJs).
    Claire, Mum to Archie, 5 and Jack, almost 3! Number 3 on the way!

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    528

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    ok, so my lo wakes and doesn't eat but still requires soothing to get back to sleep. I guess she didn't read the book, LOL! Seriously though, I very rarely nurse her at night, maybe twice in the last month but she still wakes up. Any idea how to wean her off soothing from my dh??
    Mom to Abigail, born May 3rd, 2007 (self-weaned at 27 mths) and Charlotte, born Nov. 24th, 2009. Both reflux babies and EBF. Charlotte weighs 31 lbs at 26 mths.

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    93

    Default Re: Night feeds at 9 months old....

    Well, hmmm. Does she settle back down as soon as you go in her room and pat her back or whatever you do? That would be hard because I'd think the next step would just be not to go in there, but that would be hard to do, if you'd be willing to do it at all. Maybe she'll go for longer and longer periods between waking up? Have you seen a pattern like that forming at all? Do you spend a lot of time in there with her? If so, maybe concentrate on just going in, giving her a pat or some kisses and then leave.

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