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Thread: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
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    1

    Default Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    I have been reading on this forum for the past few days, and have seen so much support and advice. I wanted to post my situation and get some advice and opinions on what I should do.

    My son is 2 1/2 weeks old, and I have been bf since he was born. He has a fussy period in the evenings, but from reading other posts, I see that's normal. Even if I switched him to formula, I don't think that would change.

    I have inverted nipples, and have to use a nipple shield for him to latch on. It was very painful at first because the adhesions I had were tearing so the nipple could come out. It got much better, and was only painful in the very beginning of the feeding for a minute or so, but the past few days it has become really painful again. I am not sure if that is because he has been on the breast almost constantly the past few days, or if it may be thrush. He has a doctor's appt this afternoon, so I"m going to talk with him about that.

    I can only bf for the first 8 weeks because then I return to work and won't be able to pump there. I know I will have to start weaning him before then, but by that point he should be all formula. I keep seeing on these posts that the first 6 weeks are the hardest, so I question if it is worth my sticking it out only to have to stop completely at 8 weeks?

    Also, if I do decide to continue, can I bf at night and do formula during the day? Is that still beneficial to him? I know bf is better than formula, but I"m in so much pain, and I worry that it's a waste of my time when I know I have to start weaning him in a few weeks to have him be completely on formula by 8 weeks...

    Any advice is much appreciated -- thank you!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2007
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    1,864

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    I am so glad you posted about your situation!

    You most certainly can breastfeed at night and give formula during the day. Even if you decide not to continue breastfeeding after you go back to work, any breastmilk he gets is better than none, and all of it is beneficial. Are you not able to pump at work at all, or is that something that can be worked around? Are you able to go home for lunch (or to where he is to nurse)?

    I don't have any experience with breast shields, but I'm sure someone will come along who does.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    1,285

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    to you, mama. I would definitely stick it out as long as possible. Any amount of breastmilk is better than none, especially in the beginning. I would also try to breastfeed mornings and evenings even when you are working. I had to return to work at 12 weeks and was able to pump....are you sure pumping is not an option for you? Even if you cannot, I would think that if you are nursing mornings and evenings you should still be able to maintain a supply at those times. I am sure others will jump with similar experiences. Good luck!
    Loving mama to S - 11/06, and F - 1/09

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    I am so sorry that you are going through all of this. BF'ing is certainly a challenge. This is my third child, but 2nd that I am BF'ing, and I still have some difficulties. It is a learning process. I have never dealt with the inverted nipples, so I cant offer much advice from that stand point. Sorry.
    As far as him eating so much........he may be going through a growth spurt. And if that is the case, then it should just last a couple of days. Wyatt (my 7 week old) just got over a growth spurt. He spent 2 days straight at the breast. Today isnt so bad. Hopefully we get back to normal LOL. As far as the thrush, are you showing signs of it? Are your nipples red, cracked etc? Sometimes also pains in your breast itself can be a sign. Also, is your LO showing signs of it? Such as the white patches in his mouth or a bad diaper rash that wont go away? I use gentian violet to treat our thrush. You can buy this over the counter at some pharmacy's.
    As far as formula during the day/BF'ing at night. You most certainly can. I would suggest first to try to work out to pump at work. Even if you can only pump once. This will give you a bit extra milk to store (and you can still give formula) and also will help with your supply I think. But if you just BF at night, that is fine too. Your breasts should produce the amount of milk you need, when you need it. I am just not sure if your milk will last a full year of this, I have never tried.
    I hope that this helps, but I am no pro! Just do what you can do! I am not against formula feeding, but I do think that if you WANT to try to continue BF'ing than you should and it is best for your LO.
    Best of luck and hang in there!
    Tosha

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Posts
    50

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    Quote Originally Posted by tctsmom View Post
    I have inverted nipples, and have to use a nipple shield for him to latch on. It was very painful at first because the adhesions I had were tearing so the nipple could come out. It got much better, and was only painful in the very beginning of the feeding for a minute or so, but the past few days it has become really painful again. I am not sure if that is because he has been on the breast almost constantly the past few days, or if it may be thrush.

    Hi there. I can maybe offer some advice concerning the nipple shield. I still use one and DS is 5 months (trying to wean him from it, but with no success so far). I used them initially bcuz i was super engorged and my nipples didnt stick out very far. I can remember for the first few wks that my nips would just KILL the first 20 seconds of EVERY feeding. My DH and i would count to 20 out loud and i would curl my toes it hurt so much. Looking back i think it was a 2-part problem. 1) my nipples we still bruised and sore from DS before we used the shield and 2) We found thrush in his mouth and i think i must have had it too in my breasts. After he was treated for thrush the pain disappeared and i cant even feel it now...unless the little stinker BITES

    As for weaning him, i agree with pps. If you can manage to nurse in the am before work, possibly at lunch, when you get home and before bed then your LO will definately benefit from it. Good luck!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    68

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    i agree with all of the others who have said that you should keep on nursing...
    some breastmilk is better than no breast milk at all. and, you could try to let him sleep with you...and nurse through the night so that he is getting more milk that way too.
    it isnt uncommon for the baby to be at the breast constantly. you may be experiencing a growth spurt. i have said it a few times - in the early days my dd was on my boob for what felt like hours - every single hour!!! sometimes i would get 15-20 min of rest before she decided she wanted another marathon session. i just popped it back out and away she went. several times i thought that there was no way she was still getting milk, but it is amazing what your body can do.
    why do you think you wont be able to pump? i went back to work at 11 weeks after dd was born and pumped 2-3x a day for almost 10 mos. now we nurse 1x in the morning and 1x in the evening (mostly).
    even if you dont co-sleep you could set your alarm for around 2am and pump at that time. that way you could have a bottle or 2 of ebm to send to day care with him.
    please let us know if we can help you any other way. i say keep it up. it is hard but you can do it!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
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    457

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    With my DS, I returned to work when he was 12 weeks. When I was home on materity leave I nursed, pumped (to bottle feed when we were around anyone because I was embarrassed ), and gave formula (started that at about 6 weeks).

    I never pumped at work. He had formula when I was gone. I nursed him AM, lunch, and bedtime until he was 6 months. I kept that nursing schedule even when I wasn't working. (I fed him formula bottles at other feedings.) From 6 months to 1 year I only nursed at bedtime. I used to say it was his "bedtime snack" because I didn't have much of a supply by then, but at least he was getting a little.

    So, it can be done.

    With my DD I wasn't embarrassed to nurse in front of anyone. I made it my goal early on that she was never gonna gave formula. I pump at work for her and have been since she was 4 months.

    Are you sure you can't pump at least once?
    Hi! I'm Shelley!
    Feeling like a and lovin' it!
    Cloth Diapering Convert

    Married DH 8/5/2000
    DS 2/25/03 Always making me laugh!
    DD 1/23/07 Loves to Breastfed 15 months with no end in sight!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,421

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    I am so sorry you are having troubles!!

    There really isn't much more I can add to the great advice these ladies gave you.....just remember any BM is better than none
    Danielle

    Mom to Gage 12/28/06

    Wife to Trinity 6/21/03 my best friend

    ed for year, finally done!!!!
    for more than a year now!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    have you looked up your local leader, she can help working moms!
    How long will you be at work.
    Lots of moms breastfeeding when they are with baby and then use bottles when they are appart.
    You'll figure out what works best for you and baby.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    470

    Default Re: Extreme frustration..thinking of quitting

    I agree to nurse for as long and as much as possible. An option for you may be to pump at lunch while at work. I also have inverted nipples and never used a shield. If he could not latch I would pump for just a minute so that they would stick out. And I remember the pain very well. I would lean my head back and just take deep breathes same as I did during labor and eventually the pain would fade away. I did have pain for the first month though. BFing is the best thing that you can do for your child at this point. Best of luck

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