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Thread: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    4

    Question New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    Greetings everyone!

    I'm a first time mommy as of November 13th, 2007. Sadly the breastfeeding experience has not been great thus far. I had very little help at the hospital in regards to starting breastfeeding and as a result, my LO did not latch on properly and I was left with two cracked and very painful nipples. After I was discharged from the hospital, breastfeeding continued to be agonizing and very frustrating. I turned to books to help fix the latch on problem.

    I can happily say that my nipples are no longer cracked and sore, but my LO has become very fussy and cries at the breast during some feedings. (mainly at night between 9 and midnight) He also acted like he wasn't getting enough to eat even after nursing at both breasts. Babies, being very new to me, I wasn't sure what was going on and was scared he wasn't getting enough to eat or my milk supply was low. As a result, I started pumping and feeding him EBM through a bottle for night feedings and continuing to BF during the day. That way I can gauge how much he was eating.

    He's had plenty of wet and soiled diapers and seems to be gaining weight ok. His next weigh in is at his 2mo appointment coming up.

    I've been yo yoing back and forth on either EBF or EP and giving him the EBM via bottle. It's been an emotional and frustrating 6 weeks. I don't want to screw him up to where he's not nursing on either the breast or bottle. I say that because lately he's been nursing weird on the bottle and I'm worried he is getting nipple confusion.

    I have been reading through threads religiously and found this link that LilahsMama had posted in another thread:

    http://www.mother-2-mother.com/cc-baby-B.htm#Fussiness

    Thankfully it has answered many of my questions and has described perfectly what my husband and I have been going through.

    I guess what I'm looking for is any advice or encouragement you all could give to me. I'm so glad I found this forum. It's really been a lifesaver!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    220

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    EBFing is way easier than EP. You might want to decide which one will be "exclusive" as to avoid any nipple confusion now, especially while your milk production is still trying to figure out how much to make and when. You cannot overfeed a breastfed baby, so as long as he is gaining fine & having good wet/dirty diapers, then he'll simply drink as much as he needs - you won't need to *know* how many ozs he's getting unless he isn't gaining, etc.

    He'll stop when he's had enough or cry to let you know he wants more. His arching and fussing could be many things. ie. Learning how to pass gas, hunger, wanting to suck without eating (comfort sucking), etc.

    I'm glad you found what you were looking for in this forum. I understand, it's been a godsend for me - there's always someone right there for you right when you need them. I find the ladies on here tremendously helpful and supportive.



    My LO is almost 5 months now, and I remember is those early months he did have fussy periods daily, usually about an hour or two before "bedtime". The evenings were hard for a little while. You will both tune in to each other and eventually everything gets easier in time.

    Keep up the good work!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    796

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    MY dd would get fussy at night at that age and want to nurse for the whole evening, She just wanted comfort and was getting plenty to eat. I think its normal babies to have a fussy period at night. Sounds like you might just want to leave him on at night Just keep going

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    64

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    My 6wk old gets fussy about that time also. It's been getting better, but she still has a good 3-4 hour period where she is like that.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    1,285

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    Congrats on continuing to BF even though you had a rough time early on ! My DS was exactly the same with the fussy periods at that age, especially in the evenings. I personally would not recommend exclusively pumping because from what I have read from moms who have had to do that, it is really double the work. So, my only advice is that things do get better with time. It sounds like your LO is going through a growth spurt hence all the extra nursing. This fussy time will pass, so try and hang in there sweetie. It sounds like you are doing great!
    Loving mama to S - 11/06, and F - 1/09

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    243

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    Sounds like you are going through what I went through (and a lot of other ladies here). Not much support and doubting yourself. Well, its confusing for a while, but hang in there! Like pp said, you don't need to know how much your LO is taking. My dd would latch on at about 5 pm and stay that way until 9 or 10. She would fuss, and it usually ended up being gas, them nurse and nurse all night! I would have a pillow, drink, snack, book, laptop, all right there to entertain me while she nursed away. After a few months it ended and now she just nurses to eat or really quick to fall asleep. As for thinking about pumping...nursing while you are out and about is very easy and takes no planning so keep that in mind!
    Married to my best friend since 2001 , Proud mom of my baby girl Ella 6/19/07




    "A woman giving birth to a child has pain because her time has come; but when her baby is born she forgets the anguish because of her joy that a child is born into the world." John 16:21

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    4,029

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    Yeah, totally sounds like most babies I've had experience with (either my own, or nieces/nephews). I called it the "witching hour", but it was really more like 3 hours. And, it was almost always in the evenings, when I was exhausted from the day, so it seemed like it was worse. It always took several months before I actually had a hot dinner....my babes' needs were always great from the dinner hour until about midnight.

    Yes, I agree to feed on demand for now, even if it means once an hour. Some babies just tank up before bedtime, then konk out. It might make it easier to soothe your baby if you wore him in a sling or carrier? I didn't "wear" my babies, but held them constantly when they were fussy. I wish I would have known about all the carrier options out there when my babies were small.

    Another option is to lie down with your baby in the evenings and nurse often, while you rest. You don't have to co-sleep, if you're not comfortable, but just resting on your bed with your babe might help you recharge your batteries. Pumping and bottle feeding add an awful lot of work to your already busy schedule as a new mom. You might try cutting those out, and trusting your body. Remember that pump output is not an accurate measure of how much you are producing, or how much baby is able to extract from your breasts. There is no more efficient breastpump than a well-latched baby!

    Good luck. Sounds like you're doing a great job. Just hang in there.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Posts
    392

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    I have been having the same issues with my new baby. He is 2 months old and it is slowly getting a little easier. Believe me, I know that all of this hard work will be worth it in the end because it DOES get easier as I can already start to tell. My baby has also been very fussy especially in the evening hours. You are not alone at all. I posted here a few weeks ago for some encouragement and I got EXACTLY what I needed to keep me going. Now, I am so happy that I did.

    Just keep doing what you are doing Momma....and you will find your hard work start to pay off!

    I also agree about laying down with your baby. I learned how to nurse while laying on my side with him and it truly makes a world of difference when you are exhausted after the long day. If you can do it...I highly recommend it.

    Also, I "wear" my baby around the house so I can get things done. He always likes to be held. I just made a wrap...and I've never made anything in my life!!

    Good luck...keep us posted! You can do it!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    CONGRATS on the LO. My LO, Wyatt, was born on Nov 15th!
    At any rate, I would not consider myself a pro, as I just joined and have questions too LOL.
    I do want to let you know that you arnt alone. I breastfed my other son for a year, but I remember the fears and frusterations and I had being so new to breastfeeding. It is emotionally hard, as it is now. I want to do what I know is best for Wyatt, but also want to remain sane LOL.
    Just hang in there and know that it WILL get better. You and your LO just have to make it through this learning experience together, as it is new to you both. I agree that you dont really need to know the amount in ozs that he is taking, so long as he is having the wet diapers and bms are what they need to be. Wyatt is that same age now, and recently is eating NON stop. It is hard when I have to feed him literally every 30-60 minutes. But I am trying to hang in there. I am sure you will get through this!
    Best of luck!
    Tosha

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Posts
    4

    Thumbs up Re: New Mommy needing advice/encouragement

    A big thank you to all you mommies who replied!

    We had a good night last night. I BF the entire night and he went down an hour earlier than normal and slept about 2 and a half hours each time after a feeding!

    It's comforting to know his hours of fussiness aren't unusual..sure can be frustrating though! Last night he did pretty good, he was pretty quiet the whole night.

    The wrap is an excellent idea, becca! Any idea where to look for one? Or even how to make one?

    And congrats to you Tosha! Jacobs original DOB was the 10th but he decided he liked it in there so I had to be induced It's nice to know I've got someone going through the same things at the same age!

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