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Thread: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    Exclamation Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    I recently began weaning my dd who recently turned 12 mos. I am a single parent with literally no help. My dd is very resistent to weaning, but I need to stop for personal medical reasons. I pretty much have the daytime weaning complete, but now I need tips and advice for night weaning. She literally nurses every hour in the night. We co-sleep by the way, but am looking to transition her to the crib (which by the way I have no idea how to do). I feel like I have tried everything, but am I doing something wrong? I tried putting her down after nursing her before bed in her crib to let her put herself to sleep, but she just cries dramatically for hours. How do I get her self-soothe? And how do I go about night weaning when I'm co-sleeping? Should I try transitioning her to the crib harder? Thanks for all your help!! I greatly appreciate every little piece of advice! Thanks!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    6,959

    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    The desire to nurse all night may be to make up for missed feedings during the day. It can also be tied to teething behavior, which would be in sync with your babies age.
    Many women suggest slowly pulling back from breastfeeding over a course of a month or two. What is your time frame, can you do this at a slower pace? If you are able to reduce the amount of pressure on the both of you things may go much smoother.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    68

    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    Thanks for the advice. Maybe I am putting to much pressure on the situation. I can try backing off to see if that will help tone down the number times a night she nurses. Do you have any suggestions about transitioning her to a crib, by any chance? Cause it seems as though the tinyiest movements startle and disrupt her sleep and I think (maybe) putting her to bed in her crib would entail better sleep for both of us.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    Will it work if you nurse her to sleep, either on your bed or in your arms, and then put her in the crib after she's asleep?
    my son used ot wake every time i put him in the crib but eventually he got used to it and will stay asleep being moved.
    Stefanie, momma to

    deacon james 09.22.06

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    68

    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    I tried that, everytime I move her she wakes up though. She has become very untrusting anymore. If I move just a tiny bit in bed, she opens her eyes to make sure I'm not going to move her to her crib. Last night I actually bf her in her crib and then snuck out when I was sure she was fast asleep. Luckily I am very small (4'11) and can fit into her crib. That worked for a little while. But after the second wake up at midnight I decided I didn't feel like cramming into her crib and trying to sneak back out (almost impossible very noisy mattress), so I gave in and let her co-sleep and bf all night long. I just don't know what to do.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
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    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    What about transitioning her to a small mattress next to your bed first?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    Elisabeth Pantley's book (No-Cry Sleep Solution) has some great suggestions about transitioning to a crib as well as teaching to self-sooth. It takes some time but I have heard from many people that it works.
    As for the nursing I agree with the PP that it could be because of cutting the day time nursing that she wants to nurse all night. As far as I've heard from the experienced moms, usually, night time weaning happens before day time and the last feedings to go are the morning and before bedtime feedings.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    Thanks everyone! I've tried just putting her on a blanket on the floor next to my bed, but maybe a matteress would be better. I also have checked out the Pantley book...guess I need to read it a little better. I guess maybe I should have started with the night weaning first huh? Has anyone heard of the aversion technique? Something about putting something bitter on the breast to divert baby from suckling? Has anyone tried this, I've thought about doing it, but I don't know what I would use and how effective this technique is.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
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    33

    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    I've never heard of the aversion technique, but one thing I did with my dd was rock her to sleep. As soon as I knew she was fed enough I'd "unplug" her and rock her back to sleep, then lay her down. I've been told it takes 15 min to reach REM, so I always waited 15 min after I knew she was asleep so that I'd have a better chance of not waking her up.

    Also, I've read to only do one transition at a time. It would be very hard on a lo to stop co-sleeping and to wean all at the same time. So I'd suggest picking your battles. Getting her acclimated to sleeping in her crib first may make weaning at night easier down the road. Whenever you decide to wean those night feedings, pick one of them and start with that. Just like I'm sure you did with the daytime feedings.

    No matter how you do it, it's a long road. At least it sure was for me. You'll get there someday though, I promise.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    Default Re: Help!! So Overwhelmed!!

    My dd is very resistent to weaning, but I need to stop for personal medical reasons.
    I don't mean to be instrusive - and if you're uncomfortable answering - then DON'T! I was wondering if we can help you problem solve a way to cope with your medical problems and give your baby a more gradual chance to wean?

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