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Thread: Feeling like a failure

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Dec 2007

    Default Re: Feeling like a failure


    i'm sorry things aren't working out as you are hoping.

    if you are still wanting to breastfeed and using your expressed milk, is it possible to try out a different pump, perhaps from the maternity team?

    would you also consider using a supplementer for his top-up milk (though I think again you may need to access your maternity team to get hold of one) or even encouraging to sip from a cup or syringe instead of bottles? bottles are a lot easier to get milk out of, even the slow-flow teats.

    there are also bottles available which claim to be breast-like. whilst i personally don't see any bottle as being a breast equivalent, i have met a couple of women who used them in difficult early situations and felt that the way the bottle squashes round the face more like a breast was a help in switching their babies over to the breast in the longer term.

    i really hope you get to work things out and that your breasts heal quickly for you. by the way, it is normal for nipples and breasts to be different on each side.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Nov 2007

    Default Re: Feeling like a failure

    My wee man didn't get onto the breast properly until 6 weeks. From my experience and what other mothers have said on these forums, so long as you make sure your baby is getting the nutrition needed for growth then it will be easier as your LO's mouth gets bigger.

    Hang in there. I think most of us mothers have doubts... but I think that you wouldn't be being so hard on yourself if you actually WERE a failure... you'd have already given up by now.

    Big hugs to you and your fabulous brood! You're lucky to have them.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Feeling like a failure

    Quote Originally Posted by LisaFaith View Post
    He was nursing every 1 1/2 to 3 hours, but I never heard much swallowing, so I think he was mostly comfort sucking. He had 6-wet diapers, and only 1 or 2 poopy diapers a day.


    Quote Originally Posted by LisaFaith View Post
    I'm using a slow flow nipple, but he won't open his mouth very wide, although he can. That was part of our latch problem- he just won't open up wide enough to nurse.
    Whether breast or bottle, you can illicit the "mouth open" response by rubbing the nipple from the top lip down to the bottom lip. You can also say "open wide" and show baby how to open wide with your mouth. Even young babies can mimic facial expressions!

    Quote Originally Posted by LisaFaith View Post
    When i do put him to the breast, he'll latch on and suck 2 or 3 times, and then come off. It's been like this since the first day. But now he screams bloody murder at me for even attempting to get him to bf.

    I urge you to keep trying. Sometimes it takes babies a little longer to get the hang of things. I suggest lots of skin to skin contact and lots of opportunities to nurse, with little expectation. You can do it!

    Quote Originally Posted by LisaFaith View Post
    I did a lot of skin to skin (kangaroo care) with my ds3, as he was a preemie. I haven't tried it yet with this baby, but it's worth a try.
    It absolutely is!

    Check out the links that were offered to you earlier in the thread. There is TONS of info there!

    Quote Originally Posted by LisaFaith View Post
    I have only pumped a few times this week, which I know is part of my problem with my supply, but (sorry, TMI) my left nipple for some reason is larger than my right(it wasn't before I started trying to nurse,) and is REALLY torn up and raw from the pump. It is excrutiating, and I have a pretty high pain tolerance. I rented a Medela Symphony from the hospital. But, if I can't get my nipple to heal, I doubt that bf'ing of any kind will happen anyways.
    Does your hospital have an IBCLC on staff? Or do you have a local LLL Leader? It would be really helpful if you could see someone.

    As for the nipple that is larger, you can get different sizes of breastshields (the "horn" that goes over your nipples when you pump). Perhaps you need two different sizes in order to pump comfortably. It's not unheard of.

    Additionally, hand expression is another option and it works great for many mothers. Here's a helpful video:

    Please keep us updated! Take care!

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