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Thread: prep for a weekend away

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    1,048

    Default prep for a weekend away

    I'm leaving my two year old with dh for a weekend. I've never spent a night away from her -- I think the longest we've been separated is maybe 6 hours. She still nurses regularly day and night. So my question is, what do you think the best way to prepare her for it is, breastfeeding wise?

    Should I get her used to fewer nursings and hardly nurse her at all before leaving so she's used to going without before I'm not available?

    or

    Should I spend those few days before leaving just kicking back and giving her all the nursies she wants in order to reduce any possible stress buildup before leaving?

    Or is there something in between? Anyone have an experience that worked well? Or any disasters or warnings for me? Or for Dh?

    Extra info: Begining a week ago, I am no longer nursing her to sleep at night (the first time she goes down anyway- she wakes a couple times during the night and nurses then) but nursing is a pretty important part of her bedtime routine; the last thing I do before laying her down.. and I honestly don't know how to put her to sleep for a good solid nap any other way, though two of her occasional sitters have been very successful with backrubs or whatever. She likes to nurse to wake up, but dh deals well with her waking and other than that she can usually be put off very easily when well fed and rested.

    Thanks in advance!
    Julie

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    1,168

    Default Re: prep for a weekend away

    I wouldn't artificially limit her nursing before you leave -- if she's not ready to reduce her nursing frequency, it will only stress her out unnecessarily before your absence.

    I sometimes left my DS for an overnight or a weekend starting at age 14 months. I never did anything special to prepare either one of us in terms of nursing. I did pump (and dump) while I was away, just enough to keep myself comfortable (and that became less necessary as he got older). He always did fine with DH's loving care, including the nighttimes -- he actually started waking less often since he knew all he would get from daddy was a sippy cup of water, LOL. And he always picked up nursing again as if I'd never been away (I worried every time that I would come home to a weaned boy.)

    Not so much before you leave, but when you get back, it might be a good idea to keep yourself as available to her as possible -- for extra nursing if she wants it, but mostly just for "reconnection" time.

    --Rebecca

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    153

    Default Re: prep for a weekend away

    Hello! Good for you on getting a weekend off! I'm green with envy Here are some of my ideas based on your post:

    You mentioned DD still nurses during the night. Perhaps you can give her some EBM in a sippy cup ( not a bottle but that's only because I think two year olds are too old for bottles. You do what you need to do ) Also, have DH be the one who gives her the cup during these nighttime feedings. That way she'll be somewhat used to it by the time you leave.

    During the daytime, I wouldn't change anything. Nurse DD as much as she wants, even spend extra time with her since she's likely to want that if DH is tending to her during the night.

    Cutting back nursings I think could have disastrous results, especially if you are in no hurry to end your breastfeeding relationship.
    It sounds to me like you will be just fine, and so will DD. She sounds, from your description, like a pretty reasonable toddler! Have fun on your trip!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    323

    Default Re: prep for a weekend away

    I went away from my dd for the first time when she was 18mos, for 3 days. she stayed with dh at his parents' place, and though night-times were a little rough, she was fine. I expressed milk a couple of times a day, and she was a little clingy for a couple of days after i came back, but no worries.
    Since dd was 2 I spent single nights away from her quite a bit, getting more frequent as time went on - her dad often takes her to his parent's for Friday night dinner and they sleep there and it's never been a problem.
    at the age of 2 1/2 i went away for a weekend with dh and we left dd with her grandparents for 3 days. they said she only asked for me once on the first night and after that she barely missed me! when we got back, she didnt even run to hug me and didnt ask to nurse for 1/2 hour ! /
    She was fine. I did need to express a bit of milk every day, but we didnt ever make any special preperations except for telling dd about the impending seperation and explaining clearly where I was going and when i was coming back and why.
    dont worry about it,
    just enjoy your time off

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    1,048

    Default Re: prep for a weekend away

    Well, ending the nursing relationship at this point wouldn't really be too "disasterous." I may do a little mourning, but frankly when it comes to weaning, I'm ready when she is! I really don't expect this to happen, though. There's something about my presence that reminds her of milk.

    I've had a few evening meetings lately and her dad has put her to sleep those nights with no nursing in the routine at all (obviously) and she's gone down great for him... nap too. And when she woke (which she does often), she called for HIM! This is a new thing around here... and I welcome it because I've always done all the night time parenting. I wonder if I can get this weekend away to lead to nightweaning.. That would be nice. That's more a question of whether dh will continue to deal with nightwakings AFTER my weekend away because I'm way too lazy to say no to nursies at 3:30 am.

    Thanks for you're imput. It's all helpful.

    Julie

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