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Thread: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

  1. #1
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    Oct 2006
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    Default pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    My DS is 15.5 months old. I've been pumping since he was 1 month old.

    DS has been getting EBM at day care and now preschool since he was 3 months old.

    At his preschool - he gets EBM in sippy cups ... on a good day he might drink about 3 or 4 oz of EBM.

    Even though DS isn't taking much EBM at preschool, I've been reluctant to stop sending in EBM because my DS is also allergic to all dairy (and several other things) and is so small he's barely on the charts (yeah - I know the charts are silly, just some context for how small he is).

    In my mind - that EBM has been a nutritional "safety net" for DS. But the reality is that the 3 or 4 oz he drinks really isn't much.

    We've been working with a pro-BF dietitian who works with kids with food allergies. She hasn't given us full recommendations yet - but at our first meeting did give me "permission" to stop pumping and stop sending EBM with DS to preschool.

    I thought I'd be elated to finally be able to "hang up the horns". But instead I find myself totally conflicted. Pumping is a chore - but honestly not so horrible. I've really liked being able to provide EBM for DS and have that as an important part of his nutrition. We've never supplemented and made it through some stressful dips in my supply.

    So maybe part of me is feeling like I'm letting DS down if I stop sending EBM with him to preschool? The reality is that he's nursing alot but not getting much nutrition from EBM and might actually drink more if he gets soy milk when I'm away. And I guess part of me worries that the switch to soy milk will be a disaster but once I stop pumping I won't be able to start again. What if DS needs that EBM and I stop pumping and can no longer pump in the future?

    I never thought that stopping pumping would cause me so much internal conflict! Help???

    More background HERE and HERE.

    Thanks!
    Lynn

    ETA: I'm currently pumping just once a day, and pumping just enough for EBM to send with DS the next day.
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    We don't have the allergy issue, but I can totally relate to the mixed feelings on stopping pumping. I said that I would stop pumping when DD reached 1 year. Now that she is a year I have mixed feelings weaning from the pump. I hate the thought of her not getting that bm. I am still trying to decide what to do

    If you only pump once a day and it does not bother you, then maybe you could continue. However, if your DS is really not drinking it then
    Mom to Lainey (11-8-06)

  3. #3
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    hmmm. When you say he nurses a lot at home, how many times do you mean?
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  4. #4
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    Quote Originally Posted by Number3 View Post
    hmmm. When you say he nurses a lot at home, how many times do you mean?
    I had to write down what a typical weekday looks like ....

    About 4 - 6 times.

    Morning - sometimes
    As soon as he sees me at the end of the day
    another time in the late afernoon - sometimes
    after dinner
    bedtime
    once overnight
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  5. #5
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    Weeeellll. IMO - I say if you feel it would be of benefit to drop it - it's seems h's getting a lot from you at home.

    While I can understand - Don't feel like you're letting him down - ever. You are so good about his diet and health.. he's lucky to, not only have you as a mama, but have to so determined to provide him with the best of everything

    Maybe drop to every other day and see what happens... not only with your supply, but he as well.


    Click here to find an LLL leader near you...or call 1 877 4 LA LECHE for help now.

    "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
    Eleanor Roosevelt


    "Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
    Emerson


    Ban the bags. ......... Watch your language. ....... Help keep Dr Newman's clinic open!

    We demand that our childcare providers are CPR certified... why don't we demand the same of ourselves! Get certified!

    I lost 22 lbs in 8 months... with a bit of determination and common sense information from this book.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    8,272

    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    Quote Originally Posted by Number3 View Post
    While I can understand - Don't feel like you're letting him down - ever. You are so good about his diet and health.. he's lucky to, not only have you as a mama, but have to so determined to provide him with the best of everything
    Thanks! I'm just so full of guilt because stopping pumping feels very selfish right now. I'm pretty sure DS will be ok without that 3 or 4 oz EBM but can't know for sure. So I'm stuck with too many "what ifs" floating around my head which makes it hard for me to feel like I'm making the "right" decision. I know that my DH will support me no matter what I decide.

    Maybe I can wait to see what the dietitian has to say about the rest of DS eating when we meet with her this weekend ....

    This would be so much easier if I had a big chubby baby! I know I'd worry alot less about whether or not he was getting enough to eat
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
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    548

    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    I'm having the same issue, mine are about 10 months, and for the past 2 months they only drink about 4oz a day. They nurse a lot when I'm around so I'm not worried about them not getting enough milk, but I've worked so hard to make sure they get only breastmilk it's difficult to start scaling back. Right now I'm pumping more than they need so I'm getting a nice freezer stash. I'm starting to phase down to 1 pumping session, and at a year I plan to phase that one out too, and give them cow's milk when they get through the frozen stuff but keep nursing otherwise. But I'm really scared to even go down to one pumping session much less stop pumping entirely!

  8. #8
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    Quote Originally Posted by Mummy View Post
    Let me know what you need right now :-)
    Thanks! I think I need a psychic who can tell me what the best path is to take

    I know I'd feel alot less conflicted if DS didn't have food allergies and was not quite so tiny.

    I do need to talk to DH about all this more - but he's been studying until pretty late each night so we haven't had much time to talk.
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    Default Re: pump weaning - feeling conflicted

    Update - we had a good meeting with the dietitican yesterday. We gave her 3 days of a food diary for DS, and she ran an analysis of what DS is eating (including breastmilk!). It looks like DS is getting pretty good nutrition overall and there are a couple of areas that we're going to work on improving. The dietitican doesn't think that DS not getting the 3 or 4 oz EBM at preschool will make a difference, and that if he needs to he'll make up the nutrition elsewhere (just hopefully not by reverse cycling again!!).

    So tomorrow we're going to send soy milk with DS to preschool. And I will go to work for the first time in over a year without lugging along my breastpump. (I think I'll bring my little manual pump in case I need to pump a little for comfort).

    I think I'm feeling ok with the decision. But this does feel like the first step towards overall weaning so I am a little sad.

    Lynn
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

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