Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 21

Thread: How do you manage working and parenting?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    119

    Default How do you manage working and parenting?

    My DD is 8 months and I work full time with some extra hours here and there. By the time I get home from work all I have time to do is take care of the baby - nurse, bath, nurse, bed - and get ready for the next day and then go to sleep. DD still gets up at least 2 or 3 times at night, so I'm completely exhausted. My weekends seem to be only around so that I can attempt to catch up on everything I ignored during the week - and of course I'm never caught up... And, I'm still exhausted.

    I've determined that I have to do something to lighten my load, but I don't know what I can drop. DH helps as much as he can, but he also has a full time demanding job, so his plate is just as full as mine.

    I know more sleep would help - esp if DD would learn to sleep better but I don't have the heart to CIO and nothing else we've tried has helped much...

    And, we're still nursing only at night, so what am I going to do when DD needs to actually eat dinner?

    I'm just overwhelmed and wondering if I'll ever have energy again...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Oh FFS!
    Posts
    10,008

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    BTDT. It's hard to balance and you do have to let some things go. For example, I don't clear up the toys before I go to bed at night. I don't load the dishwasher either.

    Weekends are catch time but...I do laundry and a deepcleaning of the house every two weeks. If it's nice out or if DD needs me then all that waits and I'll ask DH to put a load in the wash. Not a lot of effort required there.

    Can you negotiate better hours at work? I asked my boss to let me come in an hour earlier and leave an hour earlier so that I can actually spend time with my family. So instead of going home and putting her to bed, I go home and actually spend time with her before bed.

    What's your Child care situation? I have someone who comes into my home. So before she leaves she gives DD a bath so that's one less thing for me to worry about when I get home and I can focus on being with her.

    Dinner is usually DH's duty since he works from home, but in your case it can either be who ever gets home first of a family effort. On the days where it's a family affair I put DD in a carrier (high back carry) so she can see what we're doing a be involved.

    HTH. Some days it's more of a seesaw but it evens out.

    ETA: we cosleep which helps a lot with the reverse cycling and extra sleep and mom time. Doesn't work for everyone, but does for us.

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    24

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    I wish I had more advice but if you lived like me a lot of the housework would be put on the backburner and I know a lot of people would prefer not to do that. I'm always exhausted and definitely can't nap when ther eis so much to do and I also have a toddler who has become quite demanding.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    315

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    It is definitely hard! My DD started finally sleeping completely through the night at about 1 year. Prior to that she was waking 1-3 times per night. I am not sure how I did it but somehow I did. That part will get better!
    I agree with Mothersky, is there any way that you can change your hours? I go in early and leave early and that helps tremendously. I have time to play with DD and take her to the park, make a quick dinner, play some more and then start bedtime routine at 6:45. Cleaning only happens on the weekends and even then not as much as I would like. Pre baby I would thoroughly clean the kitchen and bathrooms every weekend. Now I am lucky if I do it once a month! Can you save up all the big cleaning jobs and do them every other weekend? I can typically clean the kitchen and both bathrooms in about an hour. DH usually vacuums while I do this. We do laundry on Saturdays but that is done throughout the day and doesn't require constant attention. During the week, i just do the minimum (wipe the kitchen counters down, empty the dishwasher, etc.) Some things you just have to let go of or just not do as often. Some things can just wait! Another suggestion (which I really need to do myself) is to hire a housecleaner maybe once a month. That way they can come in and do a thorough scrub down and you just maintain the rest of the month.
    Hang in there. You will get more sleep (maybe not right now but it will happen) and you will have more energy. For now just do what absolutely needs to be done and enjoy your baby
    Mom to a beautiful little girl-born June 27th, 2006



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Oh FFS!
    Posts
    10,008

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    Quote Originally Posted by Angitay View Post
    hire a housecleaner maybe once a month. That way they can come in and do a thorough scrub down and you just maintain the rest of the month.
    I"m so going to do this!!

    Mama to my little Diva: Miss K (7/15/06)
    And her little sister: Lulu Pie (3/21/09)

    "Don't toush da mango"
    One-handed typer Extraordinaire!
    My body creates, houses, nurtures and nourishes life. That is awesome.
    Kegel Kop says: TIGHTEN UP!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,780

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    I am right there with you so all I can offer is a big
    Kelly

    Mommy to Gabriel born 12/25/06 Breastfed 12/25/06 - 12/09 and possibly here and there still
    Madelyn born 9/24/09 delivered at home and caught by my husband

    "To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right."

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Location
    Swartz Creek, MI
    Posts
    1,776

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    The house keeper once a month sounds great... another idea me and DH decided to do was split up the chores. Sat is the BIG day where we do it all, but to keep the house "nice" during the week we have wash/vaccum days (Tu, TH Sa) and fold/mop days (M, W, F). and we take turns with the kitchen. Outside of that... then it waits till Sat... unless there is a huge mess...

    Stay encouraged... it will pay off!
    Married mama with 4 kiddos...2 girls (11 & 6) and 2 boys (21mo & 3mo)

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    59

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    I dont manage very well
    I am a single mom and I do not work full time hours outside of the home but I am gone 4 days per week ( I teach college leve courses so I am gone when I teach). As the semester is coming to a close I am overwhelmed with papers to grade, students who need to speak regarding grades etc. My days home are spent with my DD and housework is also put on the back burner. Unfortunately I have work that I bring home that has to be done so housework really goes for a while not done really well. I did buy one of those scrubbing bubbles things for the shower that is an automatic cleaner. ( it kind of sprays around the whole shower). That has at least helped with that spot I spend a lot of time working on work or the house after DD goes to sleep at night but then I am up until late ( and like last night she decided she was going to get up every hour from midnight until 7:30...I am in a daze today!!)

    My sister is going to come and watch my DD on SUnday for me so I can catch up on things ( the nice thing is my sister lives just 3 doors down).

    Sanity is not something I plan on having for a while

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,421

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    I have really good hours, but even then I only see my DS 6 hrs a day not including night waking. I cook dinner and then everything waits until he goes to sleep. I have a solid 2 hours maybe even 3 to get caught up while I watch TV. DH helps by doing his laundry (he isn't allowed to touch mine) and putting up dished and sometimes if I start on something he will join in. But I do my cleaning on my day off or when hes asleep. I have grown used to 6 hours broken up of sleep a night I know how you feel though, I used to bake a lot on my days off and now they are dedicated to him, I can bake when he is in school.. kwim?? It just takes learning what works for you and your fam
    Danielle

    Mom to Gage 12/28/06

    Wife to Trinity 6/21/03 my best friend

    ed for year, finally done!!!!
    for more than a year now!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    1,780

    Default Re: How do you manage working and parenting?

    I am finding that I can keep some areas cleaner than others ie. family room because I can do it and be with him but as for our bedroom...that's the big explosion! At least if people come over they don't haev to see the upstairs....
    Kelly

    Mommy to Gabriel born 12/25/06 Breastfed 12/25/06 - 12/09 and possibly here and there still
    Madelyn born 9/24/09 delivered at home and caught by my husband

    "To put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right."

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •