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Thread: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
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    4

    Default HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    My daughter has been diagnosed as a "lazy sucker". She is almost a month old and since birth has never really been able to suck on a nipple. She looked like she had a good latch, but my breast would just slide out of her mouth. Also, she would just suck 2 or 3 times and pull off my breast and quickly fall asleep. We tried all the rememdies for waking her up but nothing really worked. I visited with lactation consultants and they were at a loss as well. I had to start pumping and giving her bottles because of her weight lose and failure to remove milk from my breast. I would nurse and then pump and then exclusively pump twice a day to compare the amount of milk I was producing and how much she would take. It was the same regardless of it she nursed or not.

    She was an equally bad "sucker" on a bottle as well . The lactation consultant realized she was sucking her own tongue- it was positioned high and in the back of her throat when she would suck. They gave me some exercises to do with her and sent me to an OT at Children's Mercy for more help.

    The OT, NICU nurse, and lactation consultant recommended that I do the exercises with her, use a nipple shield and nurse for no longer than 10 minutes and then give her a bottle of breast milk. I was to keep feedings under 30 min. because after that point she was burning more calories trying to eat than she was taking in.

    She is now gaining weight like a champ and doing a bit better on the bottle though she still doesnt make an actual seal - the corners of her mouth are open. She will latch on to my nipple in a nipple shield but still doesnt really remove any milk and falls asleep after a few minutes or gets frustrated and cries. My nipple still slides right out of her mouth and she still isnt removing any milk. To top things off now we have thrush.

    Im so sad and frustrated. Id been so looking forward to breastfeeding and now all I am doing is pumping around the clock (every 2 to 3 hours). I want to breastfeed but it seems like it is never going to work out and I cant keep up pumping at this rate. Im starting to think of transitioning to formula and feel like a failure. The lactation consultants and my doctor all said Im doing everything right and my daugther is just a special case - she isnt tongue tied or have a high palate - she just refuses to suck. And now I think its worse due to the bottles she has been taking for the past 2 1/2 weeks.

    Any advice would be appreciated. Sorry for the long post - I just wanted to put it all out there - we've been working so hard and tried so many things.

    Thanks
    Marisa

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    988

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    I am so sorry that you are going through this. You have been doing great to get this far! And pumping out the milk and giving it to her is still breastfeeding! Lot's of mothers do it for months, there is a special forum just for that.

    I don't really have any advice, but the ladies on here are all wonderful and I'm sure someone will be around to give you some! We are all here to support you! Oh and

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    634

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    Im very sorry to hear about your struggle. But you are doing great, so hang on in there. I pumped for the first 1 month becoz of bad latch. And then after that when I tried BF again it worked.. took a couple of days but it was worth it. Now I am back to pumping as my LO is a distractible baby and wont stay at the breast for more than 5 seconds..I have been doing this for 3+ mths now.

    Would it help if you stimulate your breast first to get a letdown before giving it to her? If she gets the milk quickly she may want to make an effort to stay on the breast? Just throwing out ideas here.

    Dont give up so soon, especially when you know that BM is best for your baby. Keep doing what you're doing. Good luck.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    282

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    Is the OT through Early Child Intervention? If not, is it possible to get an OT through Early Child? One of my twin boys also had a very weak suck, and had weak oral motor skills. One of my boys gets OT, they come to my house, and it's made a HUGE difference. He had problems gaining weight and now he's been gaining weight very well.
    Celeste
    Mommy to:
    Kalynn 8/12/02
    Ronin and Ryker 10/9/2006

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    Not around here as much :(
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    12,132

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG



    I'll assume they checked for tongue tie?
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  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
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    59

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    Oh, how frustrated you must be after going through so much- but my advice is don't give up! If you can find a way to keep giving baby your breast milk, any at all is better than none. Maybe with time this will get better- there's no way to know yet and she is still so young. Have you tried to get her to suck on an orthodontic paci? Just a thought. What about suck training with your finger in her mouth and drawing her tongue down and forward with your finger? I have had three babies with suck/ latch problems. Two were tongue tied and one was similiar to yours. We kept going to the OT at the hospital, did lots of paci and finger suck training. I pumped and gave her a bottle for some feedings for the first year, but after that she went on to nurse on her own until she weaned at 3!
    So, just some encouragement for you. Maybe she will improve. It takes time, and she isn't that old yet. It took my daugher months of work to get the hang of it. She never had a great latch, and when she nursed it was loud and uncoordinated, but she did it eventually! I was truly surprised she did so well after I quit pumping.
    If you don't pump and give a bottle, does she try to suck her hand, or will she nurse better if she's really hungry? What about trying to put her to breast half way through the feeding when she's calm? There are still more things you could try maybe. I don't know everything about your situation though. If you can't keep pumping as often, just do your best and
    trust your instinct. If you do, then you will feel better about it in the end no matter what happens.
    Hang in there! And try to talk to other moms who are having/ had this problem if you can.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    4

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    Thanks for the responses and suggestions.

    They checked Ebina and she isnt tongue tied. We are doing the finger exercises for suck training and also to try to loosen her lips to latch better. She is also supposed to suck on a soothie pacifier to practice getting her tongue down and out. These things have helped a bit - I can tell by her suction on the bottle and when I am doing the finger training. But she still wont get her tongue over her bottom gums.

    She will stay on the boob for longer lately but she doesnt suck hard enough to remove any milk- I always pump afterwards to see. Im still pumping and will continue to for as long as I have milk to give her - but I am reducing my pumping schedule - once late before bed, once around 2am and then again around 6am. During the day I pump every 2 to 4 hours depending on the day.

    Thanks for your thoughts and support!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    59

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    That sounds like plenty of pumpin to me. A lot of moms never get up at night to pump or only get up once. During the day every 3 hours is OK. Every two hours is considered pretty frequent I think.
    Sounds like you're doing a great job with all that therapy you're doping plus pumping. Make sure you give yourself some free time once in a while- even if it's just lunch out with a friend or getting your hair done, going to the bookstore, etc. Take care of yourself and you will find it's easier to take care of your LO.
    Also, how did your LO health care providers determine she wasn't getting any milk when nursing? Are you sure she's not getting any? Have you tried breast compressions while nursing? That helped me quite a bit.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Posts
    138

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    Have you thought about a medela Supplemental Nursing System
    http://www.medela.com/NewFiles/specialtyfdg.html#sns
    It allows you to feed from the breast but the milk just comes out of a tube thing attached to your breast. So, if she does suck she will get more from your breast too. IF she doesnt suck well, she will still get fed from the tube on your breast.

    Micah Mateo 10 months old
    And my angel Tyler born and passed 3/3/06

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: HELP...giving up breastfeeding? LONG

    don't be afraid to call your local LLL leader she is around to help!
    She might know another local mom who had problems like your babies and having somebody to talk to that has btdt is helpfull!

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