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Thread: Can't leave baby with anyone?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    59

    Default Can't leave baby with anyone?

    i am having trouble getting baby to be ok when I leave her, even for just a couple hours and REALLY need advice.

    LO nurses sometimes every hour or two during the day, and she is sleeping all night most of the time (10:30 p.m.-5:30 a.m.).
    I go back to work in 2 weeks. I work the 3-11 p.m. shift as a nurse and am gone from the house from 2:15 until close to midnight. I know I can only pump twice at work- and that's going to be hard, but I will make it work.

    I tried leaving her with dh twice in the last week for a few hours with pumped milk and the Avent bottle. I said 2 oz. at a time, and I nursed her right before leaving at 5 p.m. At 6 she wanted to eat and sucked down the 2 oz. quickly. Then she cried the entire time until I came home. After I came home she nursed for a few minutes both times, but was awake msotly crying for HOURS afterwards, up well past midnight as well. She vomited both times- I think from all the crying for hours.
    I am dreading going back to work, and so is dh who doesn't like the thought of her screaming for 9-10 hours while I am gone.
    Should we introduce a pacifier to help with sucking needs maybe?
    Why do you think she is crying for hours when I am gone? None of my others have done this and I have worked and pumped with the last three kids!!!
    I tried leaving her in the church nursery tonight for 45 minutes and she got so worked up that after she nursed she still cried all the way home, nursed again at home, then vomited after crying again for a while.

    I don't know what to do and this is fast approaching. I also need to be able to go somewhere with a friend sometimes, or spend time with one of my other kids- there are six others! I'm feeling so tied down- no free time- can barely get a shower, read the paper, or just sit alone and think by myself...I just don't understand what's going on with her....or what to do...please help...oh, btw, she is 8 weeks old now.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    59

    Default Re: Can't leave baby with anyone?

    I know this is a long post, but any advice or tips are appreciated!
    Thanks

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Davenport, FL
    Posts
    763

    Default Re: Can't leave baby with anyone?

    I do not have much to offer, but I would get her a paci. I am not sure if Advent makes a paci like their bottle nipples, but if they do get one. Otherwise, I have been using soothie paci with success and no confusion that I am aware of, yet. My dd2 is 7wk (8wk on the 11th) and our girls sound llike mirror images of each other.

    I know my dd2 will drink about 4oz ebm from a bottle so maybe leave dh with more milk and try feeding her with the bottle twice a day not just with dh to get her use to the bottle.

    That is my only guess. HTH
    Becky ~ 33 Dh ~ 37 (my little geek of geeks)
    Dd1 ~ Brittney 5yrs aka Bunny
    Ds ~ Xander 3yrs aka Xaxu
    Dd2 ~ Bailie 1yr aka Dede

    Still going 14months later.

    1yr goal and save $2200 average.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    miles from nowhere
    Posts
    11,107

    Default Re: Can't leave baby with anyone?

    Wow! Seven babies nad all of them breastfed, that is really amazing! It sounds like you're having a rough time with this one. I know my lo got really upset in the beginning when I'd leave her, but she did get used to it and she always calmed down once I came back- I never had the problem of her throwing up. That sounds awful, for you and for her!

    The only thing I can think of that might help is maybe leaving for very breif periods of time each day . Maybe start at 15 minutes and work your way up, adding 5 or 10 minutes every time? This might slowly teach your lo that mommy always comes back without the complication of being hungry or having to eat from a bottle adding to the upset. HTH
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Posts
    59

    Default Re: Can't leave baby with anyone?

    Thanks for the tips- anything helps right now, since I haven't dealt with this before. Having 6 other kids besides new LO you'd think I would have dealt with this, but the others were very accepting about my leaving them for hours with dh, with or without milk.
    This little girl just will have nothing to do with anyone but me. She fusses when she is not at the breast or in my arms. She likes to lie against the breast after she's done nursing and will smile and be content. My mom thinks I'm spoiling her though and that I should quit. She said by doing this I am making it harder for other people to watch her.
    I really don't know- I think it's bonding time, and if it makes her so happy why shouldn't I allow it?
    Any more tips are welcome...I am thinking of taking some 4 hour shifts this weekend to ease her into my going back and being gone 9-10 hours at a time. What do you think? Part of me wants to stay home as long as possible, but it seems maybe kinder to ease her into this...

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Davenport, FL
    Posts
    763

    Default Re: Can't leave baby with anyone?

    Either the shift or I would have dh be the one to feed her the hours you are work..just leave him enough milk. I do agree it would be kinder.
    Becky ~ 33 Dh ~ 37 (my little geek of geeks)
    Dd1 ~ Brittney 5yrs aka Bunny
    Ds ~ Xander 3yrs aka Xaxu
    Dd2 ~ Bailie 1yr aka Dede

    Still going 14months later.

    1yr goal and save $2200 average.

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