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Thread: Pressure to Wean

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    235

    Default Pressure to Wean

    Anyone else getting pressure from their husband or anyone else to wean at 1 year? My son is 10 months old and we nurse all day long - and sometimes at night if he needs it. I LOVE IT! It is the best feeling in the world and I feel that I should be able to nurse him until he is ready to be done - not what the calendar says.
    My husband thinks nursing past a year is "weird". I think he hears it from his Mother and Sister too. I finally put my foot down and said we'd "start" weaning at a year. But I can't imagine my son wanting his "boo-boo" and me telling him "Sorry, you're too old"
    UGH

    Anyone else dealing with this?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    Not around here as much :(
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    12,132

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    No - my hubby knows better than that He did ask me once how long I plan to nurse DS...I said until he's finished. He said thats what he figured and went on to say why not. I mean it's not like it's damaging him

    You don't have to wean mama - just talk to him and make sure, double sure to point out the extended benefits of going beyond a year. Tell him to ignore his mom and sis and make sure to say "don't you want whats best for DS?" And ask him too, what his biggest concerns are? Then you can takle it from the front... kwim?

    Good luck
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    1,064

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    Maybe try sharing some of the information from this American Academy of Family Physicians position paper on breastfeeding. If you scroll down to the section on nursing beyond infancy, it says that the baby is at increased risk of illness if weaned before age 2.

    http://www.aafp.org/online/en/home/p...tionpaper.html

    Here is another good link with benefits of extended BF:

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/ebf-benefits.html

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Posts
    1,307

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    When I first mentioned bf beyond a year to DH he was really hesitant. I then started making comments about the benefits of bf (emotional as well as physical). The next time I brought it up he was used to the idea and agreed it was a good thing. I would just keep mentioning the benefits and that it is perfectly normal (WHO recommends bf for at least 2 years!). Ask him what concerns his Mom and Sister have. Maybe then you could address those if you felt it appropriate. Not that you need to defend your bf to anyone, but it may educate them and they may not criticize as much (one can hope!). No one in DH or my family has bf before. We get questions and I try to give the most information I can and then no one really says much to us about it

    Mom to Lainey (11-8-06)

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    760

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    My DH has been bugging me to wean ages ago before my lo was even 6 months old. He still has the thing in mind that our lo wakes up sooo often during the night because he is hungry and breast does not satisfy his hunger. He says that all his friends' children sleep thru night cos they are on formula. We do argue about this issue. I usually tell me that I see a lot of benefits in breastfeeding although let's face it breastfeeding is a committment and can be tiring sometimes. I admit. However I dont wish to break this relationship with my lo now that we have made it this far.

    My advice would be (as mentioned by other people) tell your husband about the benefits of breastfeeding especially the antibodies in your milk. Finally I would say do what is best for your family, primarily for your lo. to you.
    Mom to Wayne since 02.24.2007
    AND
    Keeran 07.19.2010

    My kids are my life!

    You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them - Desmond Tutu

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    1,197

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    My husband thought it would be weird beyond 2 years of age (he knew the WHO recommendation so we never considered stopping before 2 anyway) but then as I read about how anthropological studies show that human babies are designed to BF between 2.5-6 years and how formula companies with their disgusting marketing strategies made us forget about our babies' biological needs, we both started to think that nursing at least past 2.5 years would be the best for our child. Maybe you can mention those studies to your husband too. After all scientific arguments always win

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    627

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    Quote Originally Posted by Momofpreciousson View Post
    My DH has been bugging me to wean ages ago before my lo was even 6 months old. He still has the thing in mind that our lo wakes up sooo often during the night because he is hungry and breast does not satisfy his hunger. He says that all his friends' children sleep thru night cos they are on formula. We do argue about this issue. I usually tell me that I see a lot of benefits in breastfeeding although let's face it breastfeeding is a committment and can be tiring sometimes. I admit. However I dont wish to break this relationship with my lo now that we have made it this far.

    My advice would be (as mentioned by other people) tell your husband about the benefits of breastfeeding especially the antibodies in your milk. Finally I would say do what is best for your family, primarily for your lo. to you.
    We discovered that dd only nursed at night because the milk was available. Once she turned a year old, I told DH that he needed to get up with her once in the night and see if he could get her back to sleep without her needing to nurse. She was sleeping through the night within 3 days. Once the milk wasn't there, she decided she could wait until breakfast. He said she didn't fuss much at all.

    I my DH!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    235

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    Thanks for all the advice everyone!!!! I think I may print some of the info out and "leave" in his office. I may even highlight some key points.
    "Ooops, how did that get there?"

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    45

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    My in laws are pressuring me to wean. We have partially weaned and are going slow, but my FIL thinks we should go cold turkey and that I am just confusing my son by giving him the breast during the day and not at night.

    I too have told him of all the studies and emailed him some links about bfing beyond one. I feel like telling him that I will nurse my son through kindergarten and pull him out at recess to nurse! Wouldn't that throw himfor a loop!

    Anyway, keep doing what you're doing b/c ultimately it is YOURS and the CHILDS decision when to quit, NO ONE ELSE!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    235

    Default Re: Pressure to Wean

    Yay, I'm not sure why people outside the immediate family (in-laws) think it's their business to decide when to stop breastfeeding.
    It really makes me mad! Argh!

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