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Thread: Just found this site...please help. :(

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21

    Default Just found this site...please help. :(

    Hi, my name is Sherri, and I have three daughters, 7, 3 and 9 1/2 months. I just stumbled upon your site this morning, and until today, thought I was the only person in the world who had this problem...

    I have been bfing my 9 1/2 month old exclusively until a few weeks ago. I had been told at one time that you could technically solely bf a baby for even up to a year, and that is really what I had set out to do, but most people look at you like you have three heads when you tell them this. I even had my pediatrician tell me that at about 6 months breast milk starts to taper off (nutrition wise, I guess) Anyway, I definitely wanted to wait past 6 months to start solids for several reasons, but mainly because my oldest dd had many food allergies...Anyway, my baby was 6lb, 2oz at birth, and my smallest baby. She is also my first baby to have bf this long. My other 2 had to be on formula at this age, much to my dismay. So, weight-wise, I have no way to compare her weight to them at this age. Anyway, I missed her six month appointment, because my other child was sick, and haven't been back because I didn't want them freaking out about me not giving her solids yet. So, here is my delima. She is still so tiny and petite. Both of my other dds were born weighing much more, and so I don't know if she is just petite because she started out that way, or if something is truly wrong. I am very tiny as well, and really--this baby *fits* my size much more accurately. I tried offering her solids starting a couple weeks ago, mainly because I have gotten worried about how tiny she is. But she will not have anything to do with it. The first bite of solids I gave her, she really gagged on and after that, she sees the spoon coming and cries and turns her head away. So in an effort to back off, I have been putting soft foods on her tray, even baby food for her to play in, or healthy foods for her to hold and chew on, but still she doesn't show interest. I actually read in a magazine recently that if you don't start your baby on solids at 6 months you are risking having them have oral aversions. Is this what I have done????? I wouldn't be as worried about just taking my time and letting her gradually adapt to solid food, but I am paniking because she is so tiny. At birth she was 6lb 2oz, at two months, she was a little over 10 lb, and at 4 months, she was 12lb, 2 oz, and at 6 months I weighed her (not on a baby scale) and she was around 13 lb. I believe that now she is around 14 lb. I read on another thread something about output, and I am wondering wha appropriate output is for a 9 month old on breastmilk? And should she be charted using a different chart that is only for bf babies? I really struggle eating enough because I am petite anyway, but am always trying very hard to eat a drink a lot, and make sure I have enough fat and protein in my diet. I would really like to have a pediatrician that is more understanding and supportive of my desire to solely bf, but I am truly not sure one exists here, and I am pretty sure when I go to the ped this week, they are only going to tell me to supplement with formula. Sheesh...I am so sorry to ramble like this. This is the first time I have found anyone else who supports the idea of solely bfing past 6 months. *sigh* Any help is greatly appreciated.

  2. #2

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    You can see the new WHO growth charts here:http://www.who.int/childgrowth/standards/en/

    You aren't "creating" an oral aversion. Your baby may simply be telling you that she's got allergies, and doesn't want/need food.

    Instead of spoon-feeding, can you offer solids that she can pick up and eat herself? Banana chunks, avocado chunks? Sweet potato chucks?

    How is she doing on developmental milestones? Is she meeting those like she should be? Crawling, pincers grasp, sitting up, etc. If she's not developmentally where she should be for her age, then you really need to follow up more with the doctor.

    Otherwise, she could just be small, like you are.
    Shannon
    LLL Leader

    Protect your privacy online; don't use your full name. Click My Alias at the top left corner.

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  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Hi Shannon,

    Thanks for your reply. I believe she is developmentally up to date. She doesn't crawl, but I know there is a big range on that. She has the pincher grasp, and is sitting up well. She loves to be carried around, and hates to be put down, so I feel that part of her not crawling is due to that. Off to check out the growth chart, thanks!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    447

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Are you nursing her on her cues? How often does she nurse in 24 hours? Do you offer both breasts at each feeding? Does she seem satisfied after nursing?

    I think reasonable output for a 9 mo is 3-4 wet diapers in 24 hours, since their bladders get bigger so they pee a little less often as they get older. As for poops, anything btwn 7 times a day or once in 7 days is normal, however, some ebf babies have been known to go as long as 2 weeks btwn poops. This isn't a problem, and it's not constipation unless the poop is hard and dry.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Yes, I nurse her pretty much all day, whenever she wants. And I was feeding one side at a time since she is such a fussy baby (all my babies are) and since she was feeding so often, but have been offering both sides over the last few weeks. She poops once every day or every 2 days. The other thing that sucks about my ped, is that when I tell her that I feed on demand, she always says, "So every 3-4 hours?" And I say, "well, on demand, so much more often than that." And then she says, "So every 3-4 hours." and writes it down. One thing I read after searching on here is that maybe I should let her feed more during the night. I usually feed her once at night, but was having dh try to get her back to sleep if she woke more than that, but am realizing that she DOES feed really well at night when she wakes, and I shouldn't miss that cue. I had no idea. I have never gotten to bf this long. Also, does anyone know how to track down a ped that is more bf friendly? I am in NM.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Hi Shannon,

    It sounds like dd's growth has been steady. That is the important thing. If she continues to grow, you know she is getting what she needs. Here is a link to caloric values of common baby foods compared to formula and BM. As you can see, some of the values are high, but since they are per ounce, she would have to eat a TON of them to get what she is getting in your milk!

    http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/vi...dcalories.html

    (This is not an LLL source)

    As far as being told to supplement with formula: you are the mom! You can tell the ped. that dd has had a steady climb on the growth charts (download the WHO charts to take with you-and go so far as to suggest they photo-copy it to keep on hand for other BF moms!) and is meeting milestones and you would like further references as to why supplementation is necessary.

    When asked about solids at the ped. sometimes it helps moms just to sort of "leave out" certain info, if you know what I mean... You can just answer with an ambiguous response, such as "Yes, we are trying Cheerios, sweet potatoes, apple sauce and bananas. We offer many of the same things we are eating ourselves. She certainly has her favorites!"

    As far as finding a BF friendly ped: the best way to go about this is to chat with other BF moms. And where can you do this? At an LLL meeting! You won't hear LLL Leaders making recommendations about doctors, but there is a wonderful opportunity at LLL meetings to sit around and chat with other moms and see who they use for a provider (could be family doc. or ped). You will also be able to talk to other moms about you feelings about dd and solids.

    Here is a link to finding a group near you. Keep in mind, not all groups have websites, so you may have to call the 1-800 number if you don't see one in your area that has a website.

    http://www.lalecheleague.org/leaderinfo.html

    For what it's worth: my two girls were born at 6 lbs 6 oz. and followed almost the exact same growth curve you described. I always told people that BF allowed them to grow to the exact size that was normal for them. I am 5'2" and dh 5'6". We are small people who made small babies. My girls are still petite but continue to grow steadily. (This is just anecdotal, but I just thought I would share! )

    It sounds like you are doing a great job following dd's cues and needs. Continue listening to her! There will be no doubt when she is ready to eat. At this age she will just take right off-probably without you doing it for her!

    Keep up the good work!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Hi again...thank you for all your responses. I actually had her weighed today, and I was wrong. She is only 13 lb at 9 1/2 months. Is that terrible? That means that she gained about a pound over the last 4-5 months! Her skin tone looks great, her eyes look great, etc. etc...she isn't crawling, but she is doing everything else she should be at this age. I just know my ped is going to go nuts, and make me worry even more. She says she is pro-bf, but when it comes down to it, she really isn't. UGH! I don't know what to do!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    1,368

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    You should find out if she grew in length as well. Some older BF babies lean out in their later months. This is normal. If she is growing (up and/or out) and you are satified with her overall health, then just repeat this mantra: "I am the mother, I am the mother, I am the mother!"

    Also, some scales vary in accuracy. It is important that she be weighed on the same calibrated scale everytime. There can be large discrepancies in scales.

    Good luck!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Thank you again, Kate. She has grown about 2.5 to 3 inches in 5 months, and her head circ went from 40cm to 44cm in the same amount of time. Any idea if that is ok? Also, sorta veering off topic here, but is it ok to call a LLLleader in my area any time of day? I feel sorta funny just up and calling them for some reason.

    ETA: oh, and nope, not on the same scale...

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    447

    Default Re: Just found this site...please help. :(

    Quote Originally Posted by sls
    is it ok to call a LLLleader in my area any time of day?
    Yes. In theory anyway, LLL leaders are on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. If you call at 3 am, however, they might not answer. At least that's what my local leader said. Just call one; I'm sure she'll be friendly, helpful, and very glad you called.

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