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Thread: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    Default Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    In 2 months I am scheduled to go on a 10 day biz trip to India and I am still nursing my 19 mo old 3-7x daily. I have thought of 3 options:
    1 - Bring ds with me (but very costly and not so safe for a toddler and he will get in the way of my work)
    2 - Wean before I go (we're not ready! But maybe this is the best answer.)
    3 - Plan to pump while away so my supply does not dwindle.
    I am leaning toward option #3 but need advice on how this will work. I am so worried about making him go from nursing several times a day to NOTHING for 10 days. DS currently drinks whole milk from a sippy cup. I have some initial questions:
    Should I pump before I go so he can have bf in a cup while I am away? Maybe we could get him used to it now?
    Should I try to cut down to 1-2 sessions per day to make life easier for my DH and mother (she'll visit to help DH with our 3 kids) ... making him less dependent on nursing?
    What else???
    Thanks so much!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    Hi,

    I haven't been on a trip that long but I have gone on a few that were about three days. The last one I did when DS was 19 months old. What I did was pump around the times he might normally nurse, which are all outside the work day. So I'd pump before dinner, before bed, and first thing in the morning. I dumped it all and just pumped to keep my supply up.

    I guess my advice would be to keep BFing now and see where you are in two months. Good luck!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    So if it were me, I wouldn't feel good about leaving a baby who's nursing that much. It'll be a shock to him for you to be gone and to lose his nursing at the same time seems like a double whammy. If you can't take him, I would try to get him down to a lot fewer nursings. He's going to miss nursing one way or the other. Yeah it will be hard to wean him (or cut back) now but at least he still has you there to help him adjust. I would think it would be okay to still be nursing twice a day or so when you leave. And pump while you're gone in the hopes that when you get back you can resume nursing. Also once you're back you can always bump the number of nursings back up if you both want to.
    Laura, proud vbacing, ecological breastfeeding mommy to four ages 8, 6, 5, and 2. That's Kate nursing her doll, Adam.

    The Seven Standards of ecological breastfeeding: (1) exclusive breasfeeding for the first 6 months (2) pacify baby at your breast (3) don't use bottles and pacifiers (4) co-sleep for night feedings (5) take a nursing nap (6) nurse frequently day and night; avoiding schedules (7) avoid practices that restrict nursing or separates you from your baby. The average return of menstruation for ecological breastfeeding mothers is between 14 and 15 months.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    Thanks. I am still struggling over this. Anyone else have any ideas? I appreciate anything you can share. I do agree that if I am going to keep nursing, I must get him down to few sessions before I leave, perhaps just 2 per day because of the "double wammy" you mentioned. But maybe I should just wean ... it just makes me sad to think about it when clearly he loves it so much.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    I vote D. NONE OF THE ABOVE.
    If you can't take the little one with you(which is what I'd do. Not alone. I'd bring my DH or Sister along to look after him, but I at 20months could NOT leave my son for 10 days) I'd bring the pump and only pump when you are feeling uncomfortable. Once a day if that. I went from being home for 14months to working full time and I never once had to pump. Now I imagine if I was away 10 day I would have to pump. But not like you did when 1st away and not really to keep your supply up. I think if you are pumping when you need to to relieve the pressure, you should be able to pick up when you get home......are you sure you can't just insist in the baby and DH coming with you?? Are YOU Okay being away for 10 days?? If you are I think this should work for you. But I get frantic if I don't get home in time to put my child to bed. 10 days....seems so long to me. Good luck to you.

    Way too lazy for formula

  6. #6
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    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    Is there any alternative? Is there an option for the trip to be shortened? Or could you postpone the trip (agree to take the next business trip, maybe?)?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    you are obviously a very caring and devoted mother, hugs to you at a very difficult cross road. I do not have any advice as I have not been in that position yet but I can relate to the anxiety and the fear we all have that this special time might end before we are ready. After reading a few of the replies, I felt kinda bad that you might feel judged. No matter what you decide, it is Your decision. I do think it is important to pump if you go overseas without him if for no other reason than to keep your self stable. I can speak from times when I was seperated but could pump...I would get panicky, feel anxious and couldn't focus. You need to find a decision you can rest your mind that he is fine and still focus on what you need to accomplish. My only two sense on leaving is to really examine your feelings about the separation and be sure you are ready for this big of a step. Obviously if your job has this big of trip (gee, India sounds Great!!!), this isn't the type of job you get everyday. I would seek out other higher level executives to find out how they handled this steps. If you get everything lined up for the little one, but find yourself in a emotional puddle the whole time you are gone, then you really haven't done your position or self a favor in going overseas. Wow, have confidence, whatever you do, will be the right choice for you, your family and your job (and if not for them, then tough toottoos! ) Guilt is NOT something you need to pack in that suitcase! I appluad your courage, accoomplishment, and 19 months of giving such a gift to your little guy. Goodluck & be sure to post an update! (I'm still trying to figure out how to leave for 3 days!)

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
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    Default Re: Advice Needed - 19 mo old - 10 day biz trip

    I think you should try to get her down to 2 feedings a day, morning and night. That way you still have that bonding but you can leave knowing she won't be totally lost. I would also do some dry runs. (ie have daddy give a bottle/sippy cup of BM morning and night) and give either BM or milk during the day in a bottle/sippy cup and see how she reacts. I hope to get my little one down to 2 feedings (morning and night) by the end of the year (she is 13 months now) as we hope to get pregnant early next year and I don't want my milk to change or deplete and have her go from 3-5 feedings a day to none. I figure if she is used to a bottle or sippycup then it won't be a shock if my milk changes when I become pregnant. But if I can still BF then and she wants to I'll be able to.

    I would also try to get a stash in the freezer so she can still have BM while your away. And pump while your gone, even if you have to pump and dump (I know its liquid gold) but I don't think you will be able to bring it back.

    Good luck!
    Kim

    Claire 08/27/06 7lbs 11 onces 21 in.
    Addison (Addi) 10/17/08 8lbs 11 ounces 21 in.


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