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Thread: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

  1. #21
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    Aug 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    With my kids I've always wanted to BF. With my first 2 it didn't work out, we lasted a little over a week. I switched to formula for each of them. Both were started out on regular formula and had to put DS on Prosobee and DD1 on Nutramigen. Those cost a fortune! The reason it never worked with those two is their latch always looked right, but I hurt every time they fed. I would cry out in pain and dread feedings. I didn't have a pump for either of them either, and I was scared to go anywhere just incase they got hungry (which there wasn't many places to go when they were so young but there were times I had no choice).

    With my newest LO we've been BFing for 6 weeks now. I have a pump, and occasionally use some of my stored milk for a break. I let DH or someone else feed her and get an extra pumping session in somehow.

    I was terrified when DH went back to work, and he did that after DD2 was just a few days old. I've felt like I'm neglecting the older 2 and have a hard time getting meals made some days. DH has had to come home on a break at times just to cook supper because I couldn't.

    Formula isn't going to fix your problems. Cost of it keeps going up as your LO gets older. And if you find out later on that formula isn't working then you'll have to re-up your supply. By then it will also be very difficult to get your LO to latch back on so you'll be relying heavily on the pump which takes even longer usually then baby does.

    After each of my older kids were switched to formula and I had dried up, I regretted my decision. I had failed myself - I thought I was an awful mommy and that hurt worse then the pain I had while BFing.

    ~*Allee*~

    Damon 8/5/99 Heaven 7/24/01 Jasmine 7/20/07

  2. #22
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    Quote Originally Posted by mom23cuties View Post
    Okay I just came here for a little support not the making my kid sick speech.

    I have two other kids how where ff and let me tell you they have never been sick outside a virus that no kid can avoid. Not even Superman can avoid all virus.

    I have two nephews who were bf for a year and they get sick at a drop of a hat, they have allergies(sp) out the nose...

    So, spare me the research I started bf dd2 to help save money not for health reasons for me or for her.

    I do appreciate your pov. Yes, $1300 a year for ff is alot, but to put some sanity into my life, a balance, to enjoy my dd2 and not wish I was place else doing something else,...see what I am saying?
    Please. I have given you no speech and really I could have. Spare you the research? OKay. But then please spare me the "my kids have only had the viruses that no kids can avoid" drama. You have no idea what your child can avoid if fed antibodies 24/7 from her mother. My 20 month old has never had an ear infection. Ever. He is in daycare and has been sick exactly one time. One time since he learned to walk and is around other kids who are sick all the times.
    And if your nephew seems sick to you, I promise you it would be 5x worse if they hadn't been breastfed. But wait, all that supports that idea is research.

    I agree with you. Breastfeeding only to save money isn't really enough a reason to do it. Good luck to you.

    Way too lazy for formula

  3. #23
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    Jul 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    looks like you have a lot of advice here. If your only question is the posted in my opinion the answer is no. For many of us if it was the only reason we would have stopped a while ago(although it does get better) its more of the icing on the cake ykwim. from reading your posts it sounds like you may be feeling a bit guilty about the bf supplies your mom got and even a bit defensive. Its difficult hearing factual information about the health benefits of bf when you have given up in your head. I did this about a bgillion times when things were tough, you just don't want to hear ya know. when we had thrush for the second time and my lo was refusing the boob i so badly wanted to hear "formula is so close to breast-milk, you did your best" and I did here this at times but it didnt make me feel as good as I wanted it to so I persevered. Breastfeeding now is great, there are sucky times(heee hee) but for the most part I love being so close to my lo. That can happen with you too. You just have to get out of this rut. If your on a tight budget yes breastfeeding is a life saver but you need more than that. Dig for it, its there. when you havent slept for days and you look like hell(me) sometimes youll give in. You can do it and I think you want to for more than the cash...why else would you be here..this forum really can get you through it with support. You dont have to be perfect, Im a perfectionist so when my lo had an ounce of formula I wanted to just give up. But I didnt for many reasons...find yours
    good luck
    kate
    My little May baby just turned THE BIG ONE!
    Formally known as kaykate23

  4. #24
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    May 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    It sounds like you are so tired, and your baby is only 3 weeks old, so no wonder! The first few weeks are the hardest. You are almost past the toughest point! When my third baby was born, my other two children were 5 and almost 2. The first weeks were a blur and no one got a lot of sleep, and the house was neglected (especially after my mom left). But we got through it, and every week was a little easier than the week before.

    I think that it is common to think the grass is always greener on the other side, especially when taking care of older children, a newborn, and healing after birth, and in your case surgery. I hope that you can decide what you truly want. Statistically, children who are not breastfed suffer illnesses more frequently. There will always be exceptions to this, but they are only anectodal. The experience of your other children and your nephew does not change the evidence that breastfeeding is the most important health choice a mom can make for their baby. Breastfeeding is important, and there are long term consequences of not breastfeeding that are not evident in the first few years. I would encourage you to learn as much as possible about why breastfeeding is so important before you make your decision. We are all here to support you along the way.

    Things get so much easier if you can just hang in there. Another thing to consider is that regardless of feeding method, you will still have to feed the baby. You will still have to care for your other children. Life will still be a madhouse, LOL! Breastfeeding is worth it, and the issues you have described sound more like you are struggling dealing with the demands of three children rather than the demands of breastfeeding. I hope you are able to find what works best for your family.
    "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi

  5. #25
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    Jul 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    When we sit to nurse I get sick, angry, sad, tired, want to cuddle, wish I could just have dh feed her.....I am tired of the emotions.


    Hey I was just thinking and I often do this, do you think maybe you are possibly too overwhelmed. I dont want to overstep here but have you though about ppd. I only say this because of the above quote. Totally normal feelings but you may want to talk to someone. Your not alone. No matter what you feed your baby having one and in your case three can be overwhelming.
    My little May baby just turned THE BIG ONE!
    Formally known as kaykate23

  6. #26
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    A PP mentioned exactly what I was thinking...It sounds like you are looking for someone to tell you it's OK to stop BF'ing.

    Let me first say that the mothers on this site are here b/c we truly believe in the benefits of BF'ing to both us and our children. We are advocates of it and will encourage any mother to continue to BF as long as possible.

    On the other hand, you are absolutely correct in that some FF babies seem to be "healthier" than BF babies. I have not done textended research so I can't comment too much on that. If you really feel that your baby will not be any worse off than she is now (after all, I've never heard of a child sprouting an extra arm from formula), and you feel that you will be a better mom, wife, woman, etc by FF'ing then only you can make that choice.

    Of course, I still encourage you to keep at it. I know it's rough and I've read some of your other posts. It sounds like your whole experience is not going well. All in all, I think you need to do what is best for your whole family at this point. Whether that is BF'ing, FF'ing, asking your husband to take your other children out for awhile, co-sleeping or seeing a doctor about PPD- I'm not sure, but please know you're not alone and we're here to help!

  7. #27
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    First of all mama you need a few extra hugs... have you asked DH for some (and some help) the first few weeks are the hardest!

    Second - it seems the overall tone of the majority of your posts are that you're tired and overwhelmed (which is totally reasonable). So, if you were to switch, how would going to formula help that out? You'd have more work for yourself - kwim? I also second the possibility of PPD - can you put a call into your doc?

    Just a few random thoughts I had while reading this and other posts
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  8. #28
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    Aug 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    Ya'all have been so great. I did talk to dh and he said we should supplement at night to see how that goes. I know I am so tired. I have not slept in my own bed in three weeks. Dd2 and I sleep in the recliner because it is easier for me and well I am afraid of messing the bed. I am still bleeding three weeks after my c/s and well am tired of bleeding.

    Yes, I am just tired of life in general.

    But dh says I am doing well and he will work more with me this week well next week before he goes back to work for me to get some kind of groove. I am so happy he is proud of me and I am no were as emotional as I was with dd1. He wanted to kill me I was really bad.

    I have thought of ppd and my ob/gyn told me to watch out. One mom did mention how would ff vs bf help when I have to wash bottles, run the store as I run out....you are right. I could just sit and feed dd2 and try to read stories to the kids or watch one of their tv shows with them.

    So, I want to make it to my original goal of 4wks (2wks longer than dd1) so I unpacked my returns and dh found my boppy pillow and gave me a hug and said I am okay.

    I start the pill sunday one with no estrogen and I so hope this will help bring back a balance to my already busy life.

    Thanks for the and wake up calls.

    Here goes nothing ^_~

  9. #29
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    May 2007
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    Way to be supportive, dh! You ARE doing well. Hang in there. Setting small goals then reevaluating and setting a new goal is one of the easiest ways to get through the early weeks. When you get to 4 weeks, set another goal of 6 or 8 weeks, whichever suits you best. You will find the time flies faster than it seems.

    One thing to caution you about, the mini pill is best for nursing moms to start at least 6 weeks postpartum. There is a possibility they can interfere with supply if started too soon. Since you are planning to supplement at night, you may need to be a bit more cautious regarding your supply. It might be easier to avoid the problem if you hold out a few more weeks.
    Last edited by Mama Llama; August 31st, 2007 at 10:59 AM.
    "You must be the change you wish to see in the world." - Gandhi

  10. #30
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    Default Re: Is bf just for expense enough to continue?

    I had no idea. My ob never told me. I think he was just wanting to bring some bal. to my life as fast I he could. So, the pill I am on is called the "mini pill"? I need to read more before I fill it today.

    thanks

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