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Thread: An embarrassing question

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    241

    Default Re: An embarrassing question

    I just wanted to point out ( and I hope this makes you feel better) that when your nipple is being sexually stimulated by your husband you are thinking sexual thoughts, when your baby is stimulating your nipple, while it may or may not feel good (either feeling is okay and normal) you are thinking BABY thoughts at that time not sexual ones, and so it is not the same and you shouldn't feel bad.
    Did you ever think in the beginning when your nipples were sore and you thought your baby would never stop nursing that you would ever get to the point where it would actually feel good?

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jul 2007
    Posts
    928

    Default Re: An embarrassing question

    I have been trying to find an article I read about oxytocin, but I can't remember where I read it. I'll keep looking, but in the meantime I'll try and write what I can remember. Basically breastfeeding releases oxytocin in mom, which is the same feelgood hormone that is released during sex, so it's not that surprising (and certainly not shocking or wrong) that some BFing women would feel something similar to the feelings they have experienced during sex. I have felt it a few times and yes it's a little disturbing, but I reason with myself that it's just chemical and I give myself the choice between ending the BFing session (which Dr Sears also says is ok to do in this circumstance) or thinking calmly and logically about the chemicals and their evolutionary purpose - promoting closeness, attachment, making mom feel relaxed so that she stays sitting down with her child so that the child can nurse as long as he/she needs, etc. Thinking about it that way helps the feelings make sense and become less alarming. I've made both choices without any ill-effects to my lo. I really don't think the feelings are anything to worry about. Thanks for having the courage to talk about it. Good luck getting your lo to stop twiddling!
    Emma

    J from Aug '06 to Nov '08 and S from April 2009

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    In Peace
    Posts
    2,923

    Default Re: An embarrassing question

    Just wanted to bump this.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    37

    Default Re: An embarrassing question

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*allergy.guru View Post
    The key is consistancy. Tell him it hurts/or not/whatever BUT always use the same words (we say no twiddling ). Do not let him do it. If he refuses to stop, get up walk away and let Dad take over, or close your bra and shirt. Try again in a minute or so. He will quickly learn that it is not okay - after gets over being ticked off .
    I agree. I think someone else in another thread described how she would tell her ds to stop "twiddling", and if he didn't she would immediately stop the nursing session for a few minutes. With your son being so attached to nursing still, I think he'll get the hint quickly and resign himself to nursing without "mommy's nummy". I'm sure he'll be mad at first (my dd is exactly the same way about the other breast), but not for long.

    And thanks for bringing up this topic! My nipples are so desensitized from nursing, and I've been afraid that they would stay that way. I'm glad to hear everything will eventually go back to normal.
    AnneMarie
    Mom to Liana Hope
    Born 12/25/06 at 31 weeks, weighing only 2 pounds!
    Now she weighs 26 pounds
    and is the best!
    Food allergies are the pits

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