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Thread: told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    94

    Default told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

    Okay, I admit I am a human pacifier for my 15 month old. She is a terrible sleeper and I do just about anything for her to get rest. I started trying to night wean the past 2 nights and I am am happy with the cooperation I am getting from my LO. (I am a single Mom FYI) I waited until now to start to push this issue, because she is not going thru any major changes and has gotten all of her baby teeth and is not sick(as far as I know)!
    My daughter does go thru phases of being super clingy. Though I am seeing a extra need for comfort as soon as Mr. Sunshine comes up, by the behaviors she is expressing and the extra nursing she wants to do. I suppose this is very normal and I do believe I should respond to my LO needs. But where is there a line of manipulation am I being ignorant in thinking that the LO's behavior is a sign of asking for help and I should be there for her if possible.Or do I need to try to be more firm and say NO when she is clingy to aid in moving this processes along? I sure their is a balance there somewhere...
    Any pointers on Night Weaning anyone. I found that giving her a bottle of water has helped a bit plus I did give her Bach Flower Essence Rescue Remedy.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    185

    Default Re: told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

    Do you co-sleep full time? I know that I didn't night wean my dd until we stopped co-sleeping. But I cut down gradually, replacing a nursing with other comforting, although it helped if I didn't pick her up. I'd rub her back or belly, stroke her hair, hold hands, whatever. What we did is she started off the night in her crib, then I would go to her when she cried and comfort her without nursing. I spent many night on the floor of her room, holding hands through the crib slats. But she did night wean except of teething/being sick by 11-12 months. I could never just stand to let her Cry It Out. I'm a big wuss when it comes to that. Good luck.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    286

    Default Re: told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

    I don't think you can be manipulated by your LO. You are just providing what they need since they can't tell you what they want.
    Dana
    Wife to Jonathan Edward, 3/29/2002
    Mother of Alexander "Lex" Edward, 3/4/2007
    Attachment Parenting - it's not what you do, it's why you do it.
    Breastfeeding
    Co-Sleeping
    Wearing Lex as often as possible
    Daytime cloth diaperer, nighttime sposie user

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2007
    Posts
    226

    Default Re: told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

    I just wanted to let you know I agree with the pp. Your dd is not manipulating you. Sucking is a form of comforting. I'm sure she just has a habit for this since she hasn't been old enough to self comfort yet. It will just take time and patience. Will she take a pacifer? I think if she is clingy cutting her off will increase the stress and that would increase the need to pacify. If she was nursing alot at night she may need xtra calories in the day to overcome the midnight snack issue. Water will help with the empty tummy, so give her xtra calories in the day to make up. As the other pp said...try to find new ways of comforting your lo. We all have patterns of sleep and wakefulness during the night. It will take time for her to learn how to put herself back to sleep. I wouldn't move her suddenly if she is co-sleeping for the same reason as before. Do you have any other lo? When we stop co-sleeping we put lo in bed with a bro/sis to snuggle so it's not cold turkey.

    Here is a link on sleep patterns. The top paragraphs are about babie to 12mos...older babies scroll down.

    http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sl...epstudies.html

    Here is a link on night weaning

    http://www.kellymom.com/bf/weaning/weaning-night.html

    HTH

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    2,866

    Default Re: told i was being manipulated by a friend today!

    You're not being manipulated.

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