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Thread: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

  1. #1

    Question How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    Lilly will be 5 months on Sunday. She is still waking every 2-3 hours at night. Not always hungry because I can her back to sleep by rocking/pacifier. LAst night it took me an hour to get her back to sleep at 2 am! How do I teach her to self soothe in the middle of the night without letting her CIO- I do not believe in that!

    Thanks!

    Sleep-deprived Rachel
    Proud wife to Pete, 5-9-04
    Proud 1st time mom to Lilly 2-1-07 born at 36 weeks, 5lbs 1 oz, au natural!

    http://www.lillybugdesigns.com
    Handmade accessories for mom and baby
    All made with love, and by hand[/COLOR]

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    2,468

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    I just finished reading Elzabeth Pantley's "No cry sleep solution" It's fantastic. I would be careful though. At that young of an age, they are still going through growth spurts so the nightwaking is pretty normal. HTH.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    1,200

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    Babies cannot self-sooth before they are 4 months-old. Until your baby is 4 months old, you will have to sooth her. I know it is hard to be sleep-deprived (my son is 11.5 months old and still doesn't go to sleep by himself and wakes up every 2 hours because of a medical problem, so if there is anyone that can understand you it's me ) but you have got to hang in there. Once she is 4 months old you can try different methods whether it be CIO or no-cry solution. I highly recommend that book pp mentions though, Elizabeth Pantley's "no-cry sleep solution", it has some very good information about infant sleep.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    May 2007
    Posts
    551

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    I have an 11 week old who loves to suck his thumb and fingers or Mommy and Daddy's fingers. He absolutely hates pacifiers and always has! If he starts to cry and I can't get to him right away, he'll suck his thumb for comfort. Although this helps a bit, I agree with desperate, my son cannot completely self sooth. I still have to rock him and stay up with him to get him to sleep or calm him down.

    I know this doesn't help solve your problem, but I just wanted you to know you're not alone! Good luck!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    315

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    I remember posting similar questions when my LO was that age. What I have learned is that for the most part it is just a milestone that they have to reach. There are some things that you can do to help (I also recommend Pantley's book), but I really think that it happens when baby is ready. My LO just started sleeping through the night 2 weeks before her 1st birthday. Prior to that she needed me to help her fall back to sleep.
    You may already be doing this, but if she wakes in the night make sure to keep the lights off or dimmed, avoid talking and eye contact, and try not to change her diaper unless absolutely necessary. Make sure that night wakings are no fun for her
    Mom to a beautiful little girl-born June 27th, 2006



  6. #6

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    Thanks everyone! I have read Pantley's book and it has helped somewhat. Lilly was also 4 weeks early, so mabye that has somethign to do with it. I have been trying to lay her down somewhat awake so she can learn to fall asleep in her crib. I think it is s-l-o-w-l-y working. Thanks for the support! It's nice to hear what other moms go through.
    Proud wife to Pete, 5-9-04
    Proud 1st time mom to Lilly 2-1-07 born at 36 weeks, 5lbs 1 oz, au natural!

    http://www.lillybugdesigns.com
    Handmade accessories for mom and baby
    All made with love, and by hand[/COLOR]

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    306

    Default Re: How do I teach baby to self soothe? =(

    When my son hit about 12 lbs (when they metabolically do not need to eat at night anymore), instead of just picking him up to eat everytime he cried at night, I waited to see if he was really hungry. I gave him his pacifier, reswaddled him and turned his mobile on, put one hand on his chest and the other stroked his head from back to front and down his nose to get his eyes to close. He fell back asleep. He began going from 7pm to 5am between feedings. This was about 2 mos or so. I think we are so used to thinking they need to eat when they cry at night and we are so afraid they aren't getting enough, that we just automatically feed them. My son has continued to go through the night w/o nursing and he is now over 14 lbs at 3mos from 6 lbs 1 oz at birth! Although he still wakes up after about the first 4-5hrs and then 2 than 1 til its time to eat. I keep a video monitor next to my bed and watch him when he wakes up. I usually just have to put his paci in, re-swaddle, turn his mobile and womb sounds bear on and go back to bed. i watch him in the monitor and he goes back to sleep on his own. As Angitay said I dont turn on the lights, dont really make eye contact, dont talk, and definitely dont pick him up. I also try to get in there before he really starts crying. He puts himself to sleep like this often at the beginning of the night. We did cry it out 2 or 3 nights - ferberizing method. It was hard but I was at the end of my rope and it didnt matter if I held him or not - he still was crying. But now he often just lays there without crying and just falls asleep watching his mobile and sucking away. Eventually he will be able to get that paci in by himself and we will be all set but in some ways we've shot ourselves in the foot with it, having to get up when he wakes up without it. Although, I dont regret it and think it would be so much harder without it for my ds. He just likes to suck. HTH.

    P.S. DS was 3 weeks early
    Last edited by buttrfli777; June 30th, 2007 at 07:40 AM.

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