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Thread: I give up

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    344

    Unhappy I give up

    I can't do this anymore, it has become frustrating. Kayleigh is just not fufilled after nursing for over a freaking hour, she hungry again 10 minutes later. This has been going on for 2 months now and in 4 weeks she gained 4 oz. My milk just isn't putting enough weight on her or satisfying her. I thought about called a LLL leader but at almost 5 months she is to old and I should have this down pat by now (which I was told) I wanted to buy the book "breastfeeding for dummies." but I was told if I haven't gotten the hang of breastfeeding by now then I should just quit. She's almost 5 months and just weighs 10lbs 14oz, she still pretty tiny. I watch her nurse and I try and figure out what it is I am doing wrong. My supply is fine, as long as I keep taking the Fenugreek. I am taking it just once a day now but lately it seems my supply has started to decrease. SHe will gulp for like 5 minutes and then start the pulling on off, on off, on off, until I just completely take her off. I am on Valium now (have been for a week now) and I don't know if it is causing problems or not. She doesn't get drowsy or anything from it, it doesn't seem to effect her at all. Over Memorial weekend we went to Tenn. and she didn't eat much while we were there, she was going several hours between feeding but right when we get home she starts nursing every 2 hours again and nurses forever. Housework isn't getting done this way. She doesn't get to distracted while nursing, she seems to tune things out while eating. My mom told me she is plenty old enough to eat jars of food and bought her cereal and applesauce. My pediatrician said not to give her any rice ceral until she is 6 months and I am surprised considering her low weight gain. I am desperate and ready to throw in the towel. I fought long and hard to make this work, we've had issues since her birth. I just don't know what else to do, I am at a loss.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    6,959

    Default Re: I give up

    hi mama. Let me start by giving you a huge online hug, which I am sure is echoed by the rest of everyone here.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    6,959

    Default Re: I give up

    Ok,
    So lets talk about the crummy comments you've had lately that are making you doubt your breast feeding relationship; because thats what I'm hearing. If you are feeding on demand, and are getting a healthy amount of wet diapers, I don't think the issue is that you aren't "getting it or that you need a book on breastfeeding. You already have "got it", your doing the best you can.
    Also, can I just tell you that weight gain is weight gain and Willie slowed down to 1 1/2 ounce a week for quite some time now, and at around 6 months he actually lost some weight.
    I think some good key questions to ask yourself are:
    1. Does my baby seem active and alert when awake?
    2. Am I getting enough wet diapies?
    3. Do I have a support system?
    4. Have I gone to an LLL meeting where I clicked with anyone?
    Last edited by carpentergirl; June 4th, 2007 at 12:06 AM.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    344

    Default Re: I give up

    lol, thanks. I know how that is.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    MollyWeasleyIsMyHeroVille
    Posts
    6,863

    Default Re: I give up

    I agree with PP if your LO is putting out dipes and gaining weight, however slowly gaining is better than nothing or loosing, and you're nursing on demand then you HAVE gotten it "down". Have you tried taking her off during initial letdown to see if you have OALD that's making her pull on and off?


    ~Meg~
    Wife to Ray (09/07/07)and Mama to:
    Xander (01/19/07) nursed for 30 months
    Liam (12/12/09) still nursing through the night and in the mornings!
    Sebastian (7/29/12) my newest little nursling who graciously shares his milk with big brother!


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    111

    Default Re: I give up

    Poor thing!
    I want to 1st say that baby dd was 10 pounds at 5 months. She also stays on for about 5 mins than pulls off. She still does now and she is 9.5 months old.

    I would stress about her weight or if I should stop but I don't any more (well not to much).
    I just looked at her and she is very active and happy and just thin.
    The doctor told me told me to feed her formula. I thought about it for a min than decieded against i thankfully.
    I'm hoping that you will give it another shot. I see that your on Valium so if it's truely really stressing you out than it's not worth it.
    I hope I'm not kicked outta here for writing that but it's true.
    Your 5 months in to it and thats better than most people out there.
    Feel free to PM me let me know how it goes but I hope you give it another shot. Here is a hug!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    718

    Default Re: I give up

    I agree with the pp that a good output means good input. Not all babies are the same; some are smaller some bigger. Let me just say ds has been doing the pulling on, off thing for 6 months and it`s enough to drive one bananas.
    Hang in there

    Mommy to a busy toddler

    "He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep in order to gain that which he cannot lose."
    Jim Elliot

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    1,107

    Default Re: I give up

    Hey you don't give up your doing a great job which is your best and thats what your baby needs. I was in the same situation at 2 weeks I was ready to throw in the towel, I tried to start supplementing with formula and she ended up being allergic to it and after I saw her reaction I promised her I would stick with it and do my best and we did. I'm so thankful and proud that we've come this far and I don't see me stopping til she's ready! My lo kept doing the same thing as Kayleigh drinking for 5 then pulling off but I think it's just something they go thru cuz she doesn't do it anymore. As far as the food goes I introduced her to rice cereal at 4 mos. but didn't consistently give it to her then again at 6 I started with jar foods and now twice a day thats what she gets and even sometimes she doesn't even want that she'll just want me. Hang in there girl it will get better, remember breastfed babies are smaller and if her ped. didn't say anything then not to worry. Best of luck to you two.
    My name is Rosie and I'm a mother to 3 girls and 2 boys

    My girls:Janessa 10.30.93, Reanna 03.25.99 and Mylee 09.20.06
    My sons, Isaiah 07.16.97 and Shawn 09.12.08


  9. #9
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Posts
    282

    Default Re: I give up

    Tons and tons of hugs!!! I can hear the frustration in your post! :bighug:

    I can empathize. One of my guys was gaining weight slowly. I would see if you can get to see an LC or go to a LLL meeting. 5 months is definitely not too old. We definitely have had our bumps in the road and it's been 7 1/2 months.

    As far as solids go, from my experience, it did nothing for weight gain. My first daughter was 8 lbs 12 oz and gained weight slowly. I thought supplementing with formula would help with the weight gain..Nope. I thought starting solids would help..nope. She's just a small kid, and still is at 4.
    Celeste
    Mommy to:
    Kalynn 8/12/02
    Ronin and Ryker 10/9/2006

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Posts
    1,064

    Default Re: I give up

    When my DS was little, it took us almost three months to be able to latch without a huge struggle at every feeding. I can remember having that feeling that we should have everything down pat by now and since we don't maybe it's hopeless. But it wasn't. It really is never too late to ask for help. I know you've posted with some trouble since the beginning, but I don't recall if you have gone to see an IBCLC or not. If not (or even you did but months ago) I'd really suggest seeing if you can find one. I can completely understand why you are concerned about the weight gain and weary of constant nursing. Maybe your LO is just small and likes to nurse a lot, or maybe there is something else going on. I think that consulting a professional could help to either identify a problem or put your mind more at ease. I know I waited way too long to seek help myself. It really was worth it!

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