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Thread: bf is beginning to ANNOY me!

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Apr 2006

    Default Re: bf is beginning to ANNOY me!

    I have a 20 month old daughter who still nurses. Right now it isn't annoying me, but there have definitely been those times. My daughter was big, too, in her first year, and for quite a lot of that first year, it felt like there were days when all we did was nurse. It can make you feel pretty crazy.

    Things that helped for me: one issue is that it can be boring and frustrating to nurse for long times in the day. I felt better when I had a lot of books to read while nursing, or got the computer and did email while she did her thing. Also, you don't need to stay in the house all day just because you're nursing. Take her out in a sling or babybjorn, you can even nurse her in the sling. Or push her round in a stroller, I found my daughter chilled out with motion even when she wasn't nursing, and it helped me get exercise.

    The sleeping thing is the worst. I think you should experiment with alternative ways of helping her to sleep, OTHER than crying it out. Right now I stroke my daughter's back in her crib until she falls asleep. No nursing to sleep, but also no abandonment. We had a hard time figuring out a way to get her to sleep without always the breast, but it's worth working on, I think. It's also worth knowing that you can sleep-wean or night-wean, but NOT wean entirely.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Default Re: bf is beginning to ANNOY me!

    My first reaction is to say that remember that your baby senses all of this - when you're lying there nursing her just itching to get up that's a cue to her to stay a little bit alert so she's aware if you pull away. My first advice would be to really focus on just being there in the moment with her when you are putting her down, and really breathe deeply and relax so she gets that message that you're THERE -- really try that for a week or more and see if it helps her go to sleep more soundly.

    Another thought is that maybe she's teething, which could make her want to nurse - if that's true you could try putting some gel on her gums or giving her a homeopathic remedy (camilia works great for a lot of babies) before nap/bedtime.

    What I'm saying is that your baby is telling you that she really needs comfort from you -- either for emotional or physical reasons.

    And regarding her size, I hope you can not worry too much about that. LOTS of babies are 20+ pounds at 6-7 months. Not all, but lots. Breastfed and otherwise. At this point, the babyfat is a GOOD thing. I am strongly of the opinion that giving her your breastmilk, even as much as she could possibly dream, wouldn't hurt her.

    My son literally gained a pound every week for several weeks when he was a newborn. 100% breastmilk. It was mindboggling. He weighed about 25 pounds when he was 7 months old. Also mind boggling. He was born sturdy and he is still sturdy -- but he is not fat (though he was ROUND and SHARPEI when he was 7 months old!). He is now 4 years old and is tall and lean.
    Last edited by Amyruth; May 21st, 2006 at 02:34 AM.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Default Re: bf is beginning to ANNOY me!

    I can understand completely what your saying. My daughter did the same thing to me for awhile and then one day b/c of some trying circumstances + she was waking up to eat and I was getting no sleep. So about a month and a half ago I started putting her in her bed once she was asleep or if she kept playing or hurting me I put her in bed and then I didn't turn on my monitor and actually slept for several hours and then when I got up on my OWN she got bf. She eventually stopped crying and screaming in the middle of the night and she actually sleeps about 10-12 hrs w/o waking up everybody. So there is alight at the end of the tunnel. You can try this idea and see if it helps you out. Good luck.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Smile Re: bf is beginning to ANNOY me!

    I'm sorry to hear you are having trouble. I say this as a mother who weaned much to soon, for several different reasons. Please reconsider weaning your daughter. We are bombarded with people who think they know what is "best" for us and our children. But you are ultimately the one who knows best. I fear that all of these "messages" you are getting from an endless number of sources, family, friends, doctors, books, magazines, television, etc... are very possibly making you feel the way you do right now. In our culture, too much emphasis is placed on the self rather than helping other people. If we had a penny for every time we saw or heard something that said "take time for yourself", or "do it for yourself", or "go ahead, splurge", any one of those kinds of phrases aimed at women, we would be millionaires. At a time when you should be enjoying your child and enjoying being a mother and a woman, its terrible that so many misguided aspects of our modern culture have put thoughts into your head to make you feel the way you do. Everyone needs some time alone, that's normal human nature. But someday soon you WILL be alone. Your child will go to school, grow up, and move away. Please please enjoy this short time with your daughter. My son is 9 months old now and is nearly ready to walk. As I watch these changes, my heart breaks because of the bond we lost when I weaned him. Words do not adequately describe the pain I feel when he stumbles over something and bumps his head, and I think to myself "If only I could just nurse him for one second and make him feel better".
    On a final note, please do not be worried about your daughter's weight. If most of her calories are still coming from you, it is very unlikely that she is overweight. My son never was a chunky baby, so I've had to put up with people telling me "Oh he's so small! Was he a preemie?" or "Does he eat enough?" Gee I don't know, he has two bowls of oatmeal for breakfast, three jars of baby food for lunch and dinner, and who knows what else in between! So I envy you LOL! Good luck to you and your daughter. Just trust your own instincts. You'll make the right choice.

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