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Thread: Don't know where to post this???

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    11

    Default Don't know where to post this???

    Hi,
    I have an 11 month old son, and am currently almost 15 weeks pregnant. I am not sure where to post this, but I felt that here on this forum, there were many women who were extremely dedicated to breastfeeding and would be supportive. I admire the fact that you bf for the length of time that you do. I'm a bit envious. I wish I were bf'ing my son now. It's kind of sad that I'm not.

    I try to live my life without regrets, but this one got away. I attempted to breastfeed my newborn son shortly after birth. I was unsuccessful. He couldn't latch on properly, and he would just scream and cry. Which in turn broke my heart and I gave up, or gave in. I just pumped my breastmilk for him and fed him from a bottle. I seriously regret that I didn't try harder to make it work. I was told that I have slightly flat nipples and this might make it harder for him to latch on. I had a terrific supply and was able to get plenty of milk for him. I think the fact that I lived so far from everyone, the LC at the hospital that asked me to come back and see her, and everyone else for that matter played a role in my decision too. I feel badly for letting that influence me.

    I seriously want to be successful this time around. I know my milk supply was never a problem. I know all women can have some kind of problem at one time or another and mine is not unique.

    I'm not sure what I'm looking for here. I just wanted to say that I'm hoping to find out more about my "issues" and learn from you guys. I really admire the dedication that you all have. I wish I could be like you gals.
    anyway, thanks for reading if you got this far.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    25

    Default Re: Don't know where to post this???

    Regrets are tough... everybody has 'em

    My first suggestion would be to start attending LLL meetings. They are a lot of fun, and very informative, and very empowering. It is really great to see lots of babies nursing just as a natural thing. It is also great to hear that some mothers do have difficulties, but they can be overcome.

    I would also read (maybe twice!) The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. Also, joining La Leche League gets you a magazine full of inspiring stories about mothers and babies.

    Personally, what kept me breastfeeding when things were tough (my first had a terrible latch, I had blistered nipples, lots of pain, etc) was all of the scientific-type things that I had read about breastfeeding... the health benefits, higher IQ, whatever.

    And lastly, (boy, I am full of advice tonight!) just decide that this is what you are going to do. I know many people say "be flexible", but at least for my personality , that doesn't work. I have to be dedicated to my decision if I am going to follow through. But that's just me.
    Good luck and write back
    jamelle

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    1,168

    Default Re: Don't know where to post this???

    Personally, I admire any mother who exclusively pumps for any length of time. That is hard work!!

    I'm sorry you had troubles that disrupted your breastfeeding plans with your first baby. I'm especially sorry that so many of us live in a culture so hostile and unsupportive of breastfeeding. Ideally, a mother shouldn't have to be unusually determined, resourceful, and lucky to just breastfeed her baby! But I am quite sure that without accurate information and enough practical and emotional support, my son and I never would have gotten past the first week in our breastfeeding relationship.

    I know a lot of moms who couldn't make breastfeeding work with their first baby but succeeded in breastfeeding a subsequent baby. You just need to treat it like a learning experience and move forward to the next challenge.

    The great thing about LLL is that it offers all the necessary ingredients -- accurate information, both the "academic" type from books and the personal type from other nursing moms, and emotional support. My local LLL group even provides some practical support for our new moms; we frequently can organize meals for those first couple weeks after the birth or after the relatives leave.

    My advice to you is to prepare before the birth to educate yourself and to line up the right kinds of support. Start attending LLL meetings. Do you have any choice in terms of care providers or the facility where you will give birth? Those things can have a huge impact on how smoothly breastfeeding gets started. Hang around these boards and ask questions and read other moms' questions. But most of all, get connected in real life with other nursing moms.

    Good luck to you! I hope we'll see you around these boards long enough to hear a birth announcement and wonderful reports on your new nursling!

    --Rebecca

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    11

    Default Re: Don't know where to post this???

    Thank you.... I am going to find the closest group to my home and go to the meetings. I know it makes a difference to be around other mom's who are doing successfully what you hope to be doing. I am going to continue to read and get more info so that when #2 is born, I won't have any regrets. I'm glad I found these boards, I really appreciate your advice and encouragement. I ordered that book that I keep hearing about (The womanly art....) I just got an email notice today that it was shipped. I do feel like I'm on the right track this time. Thanks for listening to me.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    18,063

    Default Re: Don't know where to post this???

    you'll love the womanly art book. its great.
    and if you have any other questions just ask.
    you can do it this time! keep the baby with you in the hospital.
    avoid bottles and you should do just fine.
    my 1st only nursed for a few months, I went back to school and didn't know anything about pumping. He took a bottle during the day and nursed at night.
    With my 2nd I desided that I realy wanted him to nurse longer and he self weaned at about 29 months old. My 3rd only nursed untill he was about 18 months old he weaned with a little bit of help. I was pg with little sis.
    She will be 3 in june and is slowly self weaning.
    you have to take what you learned with each baby and try harder the next time. There is lots of bad advice out there and the more you read and learn you can deside better what works for your family.

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