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Thread: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    1,048

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    i plan on saying ill bf untill i dont make anymore milk..... which, really would be child led weaning w/o getting into details right?
    friends of mine have been teasing me about bfing at 3yrs old since the very beginning....and i just told them "well from your reaction already, you will be on the list of people we just dont tell!" but i struggle with this because how can it ever be the norm if nobody admits to it?? (and im not saying that i definately will or wont) it seems like everyone knows that one 'wacky' person who got her kids off the bus to bf! i just read an interesting article stating jada pinkett smith bf till 18 months and nellie furtado (sp?) till 2 yrs....and gwen stefanie saying it made her feel like she had superpowers........these are the kind of examples impressionable women need to consider extended bfing to be "Normal"....
    ~To the world you might be one person, but to one person you might be the world~

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    14

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    My daughter is 22 months. I have this issue all the time. I am constantly getting asked by my mother and in-laws if she is still nursing. Their motivation seems to be wanting her to spend the night. She has done one overnight with my mother and let's just say it was a really long night for everyone. I often feel like her exbf is our little secret.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    156

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    I apologize since I know this is getting off topic, but what did you do the night she was away? Pump? I'm concerned that once we're down to nursing (without pumping) once a day that I'll run into trouble if I'm away from the babies overnight -- like for out of town meetings for work. Currently, I pump before going to work and nurse only in the evening (except weekends, when I nurse them ad lib).

    I have been reading posts in this forum to keep me inspired. Our twins are 10-1/2 months old, and DH has told me that if I think I am going to continue nursing beyond 12 months that I ought to be in counseling. While he's not stood in my way so far, he obviously "doesn't get it". Can't exactly hide extended BF from him!

  4. #14
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    73

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    Well, I don't lie about anything if asked directly, but there are certainly times when I avoid the topic. It depends on where I am and who I'm with. I seem to more frequently find myself in situations with people who didn't know me when my guys were babies so they don't know I nursed at all, much less continue to nurse a 4yr old. And she will ask when out and about (thankfully with a code word), like during playdates, which is something my older one never did. I do often find myself asking her to wait until we get home, unless the situation is really critical (like she gets hurt or something). Sometimes I feel like I should be more open about it to "spread the word" or increase its normalcy. Other times I feel like it's just private and I don't want to get into it with someone I don't know that well. And then I wonder if I should give others more of chance, that maybe I'm selling them short to assume they wouldn't understand. It's a dilemma, for sure!

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Posts
    30

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    I was EXBF my daughter til she was two and three months. Was planning to go on longer with it until my aunt (who is an ob gyn) told me that BFding my DD at that age meant it would give her serious psychological problems! Being a new mom at that, I immediately stopped and felt real bad after. Looking back, I wish I left the decision to wean when I, and my daughter felt ready.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    68

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    Hi momma2bgtwinsplus1,
    congrats on nursing twins for so long!

    Yes, I was away from DS for 4 nights and I pumped a couple of minutes a day. It wasn't as hard as I thought it would be - I really missed him at night though.
    He seemed fine. he didn't sleep the first night - didn't ask for me or cry, but wouldn't go down. After that, he went down with a paci and slept pretty well (much better than when he has the boobies next to him).
    When I got home and laid down to nap with him, he didn't ask for booby. Even that night, he didn't ask right away, and I thought "wow, he actually weaned himself when I was gone." But he asked a few minutes later and now he is nursing more than ever (which is fine).

    I wasn't sure how I would have felt if he was done - a mix of relief and disapointment which I am sure how every weaning mom feels. But now I am so glad he is still at it.

    and bridgenboze - I am sure my inlaws have the same motivation - although I totally don't believe in DS doing overnights without us. They also want him to sleep in their room when we sleep over - also a no.

    For the record, my mom is totally supportive of the EXBF. She didn't nurse my sister and me in the early 70's but nursed my bro in 78 til 13 mos, which she thought was an eternity at the time. She recognizes how much my DS loves it and needs it. So does my DH so I guess what more can I ask for : )

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    63

    Default Re: does anyone not admit to EXBF?

    I didn't hide my extended BF of my ds. I would just explain to some that it's not like BF a small baby. It's once or twice a day for a short nursing. My son is empathetic, thoughtful and has always been very healthy.

    Also when my son hurt himself at the park and came screaming and I BF him right there. I think it showed the people around how beautiful EXBF can be. No one likes a screaming child!

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