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Thread: distracted baby

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    6

    Default distracted baby

    My son is nine months old. He does not breastfeed well. He does not breastfeed when he's awake. As a matter of fact, he's so distracted that I have to rock him to sleep first, then feed him. It would be ok if he can take formula or eat solids, but he refuses to bottlefeed and does not eat much solids. Does anyone have the same problem? How can I get him to eat?

    Another problem I have is milk supply. My milk supply goes through cycles. It started when my son was three month old. Up to that point, he ate well and I had enough milk. It would drop about once a month for about a week. Pumping does not seem to help and my son usually does not suck as well (I think it's because he has to suck so hard for not much milk) during that one-week period. I suspect that if I were not breastfeeding, I would've gotten my period. The first time it happened, I had all the PMS. I thought for sure that I was getting my period. I haven't seen anyone mentioning this issue. Does anyone have the similar experience?

    Ethan has had poor weight gain since 3 months old. He was 6.5 lbs when he was born, 13 lbs when he was 3 months old. He only gained 4 lb 2 oz from 3 to 9 months. I weight his diapers everyday, it's about 10 oz of urine and 1 poop diaper which I don't weight.

    I would really appreciate anyone who can help. Please feel free to share if you have similar stories. It's been frustrating! Thanks in advance.

    Sav

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    140

    Default Re: distracted baby

    The distracted thing sounds completely normal. DS will be 7 months on the 2nd and he has started with the acrobatics, nipple tugging, etc that comes with wanting to be a part of everything even while nursing. I ordered one of those nursing necklaces that everyone keeps on talking about to give him something to play with and hold his attention. I have also had to start nursing with the lights off, in a quiet room, with no interruptions. This has helped quite a bit.

    I haven't kept track of my milk supply like that but haven't noticed any issues. But it sounds like a very logical reason (would be cycle).

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: distracted baby

    Hi there,

    Sounds SOOO familiar. I felt like I might be reading my DS's bio! And his name is Ethan. He is 8 months old. From 0-4 months he wanted to nurse ALL the time. He is a very big baby, however, 19lbs at 4 months. He is a huge comfort nurser, but from about 5 1/2 months to 7 months he completely changed his behavior. He would only nurse before and after naps, really when he was almost completely asleep. He would only nurse in a dark quiet room, not in public, and if I offered to nurse him while awake he would get upset??? It was extremely stressful for me. Some people who didn't know about breastfeeding told me that he was probably trying to wean himself, but my reply was always, wean to what? He didn't eat solids, and still doesn't take a bottle of anything while I'm gone once per week at work. I spoke with a lactation consultant and checked with my pediatrician to make sure nothing was wrong. He was fine. Sometimes I even had to walk around with him nursing to settle him down. That would work for a while, and finally now he is slowly coming around to nursing during the day outside naps, mostly in the ERGO sling I have or while watching a baby video. I feel a bit like I'm trying to hard with him while he is distracted with the video, but it's really like he doesn't slow down enough himself. I find lately that this helps him have some quiet time when he forgets to fuss, and then he's back to playing and having fun. I found it extremely hard to read his cues for hunger, and most of the time was guessing. But he is now getting more distinct about when he wants to nurse.

    I am a first time mom, and I guess the biggest thing I'll learned through all this is the each baby is unique and different. As long as they are happy, healthy, and developmentally on track, they inherently know when and how much they are supposed to eat and will do so when they're ready. I wish I could just turn off the worry in my own head! My Ethan just finally started taking solids at 8 months (still only eats maybe 1 or 2 ounces per day), and for the first time ever fell asleep on his daddy without nursing! I am counting by blessings.

    Lastly, we still co-sleep and last helped tremendously. I always knew that if he didn't nurse well during the day at all, he would nurse during the night WELL, even if he didn't wake up as often, the quality of his nursings were better. I've read that they can often get a large part of their calories at night.
    Hope this helps some! It is good for me to hear that I'm not the only one...

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Posts
    88

    Default Re: distracted baby

    Forgot to mention the low supply issue. The last 3 months, I've also noticed a significant dropy in my supply once a month for one week. I feel like I'm going to get my period, but then only spot for maybe a day. Pumping also does not seem to help at all. I've noticed that if I make sure that I eat really well (oatmeal in the morning, and otherwise lots of protein) and drink lots of water (almost 3-4 liters per day), it seems to help a lot. The first time it happened I was worried I was losing my supply, becaues around the same time DS dropped a night feeding and was not nursing well during the day at all. He only gained 6 ounces in 2 months during that time when he was so distracted. But as I said it has gotten better. The sling helped a lot during the day.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    6

    Default Re: distracted baby

    Thank you very much for sharing and words of encouragement! The funniest thing is that I'm a first time mother and my son's name is also Ethan!

    After posting this question, I talked to a lactation consultant and she told me that Ethan's behaviors are normal and he's growing fine. It was such a relief to hear that! She mentioned that the drop once a month is probably related to hormonal changes. she said some breastfeeding mothers experience it. I'll try your suggestion next time when it happens again.

    To my guilt, I pushed Ethan to eat a lot. After talking to the expert, I realized why Ethan didn't want to eat. He wasn't hungry and I thought he was. I've stopped pushing Ethan to eat and he actually wants to eat when I eat. I feel so much better. It's so stressful when I constantly thought he was hungry. Now I can enjoy our time together instead of thinking of ways to get him to take a bottle or eat solids!

    Thanks again and I hope the best for all of us!

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