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Thread: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
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    869

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ's Mom View Post
    How old is your LO? DJ got it right around the same time he started walking. So it was around 10 months....
    Simon is 12 months old.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
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    562

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Erin, I can hear how frustrated you are by the scarcity of resources that address your working-and-pumping concerns as the mother of a nursing toddler. I'm not sure that as a Leader I have any more info for you. I suspect this is partly because the whole phenomenon of working-and-pumping is relatively new in lactation history, and so few mothers stick with it long enough to wonder whether they should continue pumping past a year, or what will happen to their nursing relationship if they stop pumping. And then your concerns are made quite a bit more specific by the issues of Haylee's lack of interest in comfort nursing and her petite size, so that you are left wondering whether a change in your pumping routine will be the beginning of the end of your whole breastfeeding relationship.

    I do want to encourage you to have faith in your body's amazing ability to produce breastmilk when called upon to do so. You've been lactating for more than a year now, with no history of low milk supply that I am aware of. Your body can do this milk-making thing in the dark with one eye closed, girlfriend! If you decide to stop pumping during your separations from Haylee, you will still have milk for her nighttime nursings. Once a milk supply is well-established and the child grows a little older, the feeding pattern can be a lot more sporadic without the milk supply drying up. Many mothers find as their toddlers move towards weaning, they may even go days between nursing sessions and suffer no engorgement, but when the child nurses, there is milk.

    You have already given your daughter what SO FEW babies receive: breastfeeding and EBM for the first twelve months of life. From here on out, things with your breastfeeding "career" can be more unique, more flexible, more experimental, and that's okay. Follow your daughter's lead and your own instincts, and if something doesn't seem to be working, try something else.

    HTH!

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    8,591

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Thank you for chiming in Rebecca! I value your input and you always know what to say! I realize that it is a new "phenomenon" that mothers have been working, pumping, and extended nursing. What can we do to change that? I also realize that my situation is a bit unique, but I can't imagine that it is all that unique, and with the number of mother's who are venturing down the breastfeeding road, getting where I am, and deciding to continue.

    I am not sure that I have had a history of low supply, but in the past 3.5 months I have not had the best success in keeping up with her needs at the sitter. She has been drinking 9 ounces, and I have been lucky to pump 7...but my freezer stash has held up just fine and I have, on occasion, been able to replenish it because she wasn't eating as much. So, I guess, in essense, I haven't had supply issues, because I haven't had a problem keeping up with her as long as she is doing the "milking" .

    And I think the instinct thing is where I am having trouble, because my motherly instinct tells me that she still needs to nurse, even when she is fighting it, and that if I can just get her to, she will be happy. I am generaly right, but everyone that is around me (including dh who feels that if she wants it she should have it but that she doesn't want it) keeps reminding me that she doesn't even want it. Ultimately, I know, it is between Haylee and me, and my dh, but its so confusing. Where is the book that tells me the answers ?

    Again, Rebecca, thanks for weighing in...and everyone else too!

    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    149

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Erin, thanks for starting this thread. I have also been struggling the past few to pump enough during my 3 pumping sessions at work to send ebm to daycare for DD. I have been off for Xmas break the last 2 weeks and can tell DD nurses less. I seem to be the one initiating most of our nursing sessions which aren't very long. Even the first morning nursing and before bedtime nursing have become rather quick (under 10 min.) when those used to be the best nursing sessions.

    Well, today I went back to work and left DD with DH. I nursed her at 7:30am and when I talked to DH at 1:15pm, he had given her breakfast and lunch, but no bottle and she seemed fine. I asked him to try giving her cow's milk. She drank 2 bottles (warmed up) fine with no problems so far. I was worried how she would react to cow's milk since DH is lactose intolerant and allegic to EVERYTHING. I had him give in a bottle so that she might drink more and I could see if she would have a reaction.

    I want to say, I feel so relieved. I plan on continuing to pump for a while, but I don't have the same pressure to make sure I have enough to send to daycare now. Not only will she accept cow's milk, but she obviously can go longer than I anticpated without a bottle. I am going away on a business conference in 2 weeks and don't have much of a freezer supply. I'm not as worried now - I know she'll be fine. I don't have any plans to wean her completely at this point. I don't mind bfing while we're together, but I can start phasing out the pumping. Yea!! Now to work on getting her to take cow's milk cold in a sippy.

    Congratulations to us all for managing to successfully breastfeed and work!
    Eva
    Mom to Alyssa (11/26/05)

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
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    317

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!



    I work FT and still BF & pump 3x day for my 16 month old DD. When I went back to work after DS and I couldn't pump, I entirely lost my supply and couldn't BF after 9 months (or at least until my new milk came in from DD). So now I simply continue to pump. I am trying to make it to the 2 yr mark without her getting cow's milk, so I am determined to pump that long also and just send her sippy cups of EBM to DCP.
    Amanda Mom to James (2/25/04) and nursling Alice (8/24/05)

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!
    Posts
    17,374

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Erin,
    if you do decide to give her your milk out of a cup, I wanted to let you know we picked up these great ones at Target! I got 6 for $2.99 They are plastic cups that come w/ tupperware lids and big straws. So when they tip over (Or get thrown on the floor) they don't spill! DJ Loves his AND (I thought you'd like this) Because of the bright colors and because he knew what to do w/ it. He Drank more water yesterday than ever! Because he wanted to walk around w/it.
    (Making for a leaky overnight dipe ) But I bet if you Put your BM in one she's walk around and sip it way more than just at meal times!!!

    Way too lazy for formula

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Posts
    68

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Erin - I have to say that I totally agree about the lack on info on extended breastfeeding and the working mom. this has frusturated me as well. Not with the same issues you have, but with having to travel for work and leave my nursing toddler. It makes me think there are so few of us who work and continue to BF beyond a year (I am on year 3 myself).

    Have you tried Mothering Your Nursing Toddler? I am not sure what it has about pumping and working, but you might find some help there.

    Good luck!
    Lisa

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    436

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Hi Erin, I've been wondering the same thing about my amost-13-month-old. I'm going back to teaching in less than two weeks (YIKES!) and I'm going to have only an hour between two long classes on one of the days in which I'll need to grab lunch, pump, and fend off clamoring students. And I'm sooooo tired of pumping (I've had a sitter 3x a week for the past few months as I've been making more of an appearance at the office). But I'm also terrified about my supply weakening. I've been wondering how much of this is just my own anxieties (i.e, I've been worried about maintaining supply for so long that it's hard to relax now) and also some wistfullness that he's getting older. I guess that my supply is going to start going down at some point this year as he starts eating more solid food. I'm finding it hard to let go of nursing before every solid meal even though he seems to enjoy eating better that way and gets more adventurous and happy about trying new things. So part of it is just a natural letting go process, which is difficult but part of them growing up, I guess.

    As always, Rebecca is wise and reassuring and its good to know that we can relax a bit now that we've made it this far and the body will know how to keep going in pace with our LO's cues.

    And I just thought I'd let you know that Jeremy is also not a comfort nurser and rarely asks to nurse during the day, except maybe a nip on my shoulder occasionally. I've been nursing him (or having DH or the sitter bottle feed him) in sync with naptime and mealtime, and usually he's good with that, although occasionally I find myself struggling with him and have to tell myself to relax and trust him. Of course that's hard sometimes as he'll refuse one minute and then settle in two minutes later for a good chow. But he's happy and healthy and growing, so again, I just have to breathe and go with the flow (so to speak).

    Anyway, sorry for the ramble, but I'm sympathetic and am so glad you started this thread, maybe it will influence LLL to pay more attention to it. My current plan is to keep pumping once at work, and maybe phase out the nursing before dinner, and keep experimenting with interesting solids. Oh, and I do sometimes give him ebm in a cup along with dinner, especially if he hasn't finished the bottle I left for him, so I think that Shelly's suggestion is a good one.

    Good luck and hugs!

    Annie

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Posts
    8,018

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Quote Originally Posted by epbrown View Post
    At night, she nurses about 3-5 times, and really wants to nurse. I pump 3 times at work, 4 days a week, to provide her with breastmilk while I am away from her, which up until this point she has taken in a bottle. She has been refusing the breast more and more often, during the day. She is small for her age, under the 5th percentile for weight and height, and I know that breastmilk provides a supreme nutrition. So I know that she still needs breastmilk. I am just not clear on how much, when, and how often I should use a more forceful persuasion tactic. How long should I keep pumping breastmilk for her? Will my supply decrease to the point of nonexistence if I stop pumping? Should I stop pumping and give her cow's milk? I am truly tired of pumping and it would be so nice. We are giving up the bottle, we know that. I think that it will be one less source of sucking comfort, and that maybe she will want the breast more when we are together. But how much am I supposed to encourage her to nurse now? Everyone tells me I should wean her, that she doesn't even want it anymore, so why am I encouraging her to nurse when she doesn't even "want" it and, according to most of the texts, she doesn't really "need" it either?
    I agree that there should be more info on extended BFing for working moms! Thanks for starting the thread, Erin, and also to those who have responded. Erin, I am not an expert, but I am now to the point where I do not pump during the day at work, and just BF Eva when we are together in the evenings and early morning. I occassionally pump (if I feel engorged) and then she gets that in a sippy, but otherwise she drinks cow's milk, water, and eats solids during the day. My supply has adjusted wonderfully. I started dropping day pumping around the one year mark.
    Our situation has quite a few differences, but hopefully that will give you some confidence that your supply will probably be okay whatever you decide to do. Also, I saw a recent study that the milk of moms who were BFing past 12 months had higher fat and nutrient content than "infant" BM, so maybe that will also give you some reassurance.
    I'm sorry that you haven't had the best experience BFing and you've done great to stick with it through everything.

    Molly

    Loving mama to JP (DS, 1/03 ~ nursed 6 mos), EL (DD1, 9/05 ~ nursed 4 yrs), EJ (DD2, 3/08 ~ nursed 3 yrs 9 mos), and
    JM (DD3, 6/12 ~ currently nursing), all born naturally
    Devoted wife to SAHD P, my hero
    A few of my favorite things that I've discovered on the forum: co-sleeping, baby-wearing, tandem nursing, baby-led solids, cloth diapering, APing, selective vaccination...the list goes on

  10. #20
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    8,591

    Default Re: Calling on a leader...for help with a wohm and extended bfing!

    Oh, don't get me wrong. My experience has been wonderful...just different! And Molly...do you still breastfeed during the day on weekends when you are together? Just got to thinking that even if my supply at nights was maintained, will it be just on weekends when we are together? I think she will still want to nurse on the weekends, but what if there isn't milk then? This is just too confusing. And then Annie (P-T-M) emailed me some negatives on cow's milk that further confused me . Ohh...the joys of motherhood!

    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

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