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Thread: She cried when I went to pick her up!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    8,591

    Default She cried when I went to pick her up!

    So I went to pick my dd up at the sitter's today and she cried. She didn't want me, didn't want to put her coat on, didn't want to go with me. She wasn't even excited to see me. I am sooo sad. I feel like I have failed her, like I have done something wrong. I am sobbing right now, and have been on and off for the past 45 mintues . I can understand her wanting to stay and play, but to not even be excited to see me? I hate my job, I wanna stay home with her. Oh, I am soo sad. I feel so rejected. When we got home she didn't even want to nurse...she always wants to nurse when we get home. Sorry for whining...I just need to vent. My dh is at work and no one else understands like you girls!

    Thanks!

    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    164

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    I am soooooooooo sorry to hear that! She was probably just a little cranky, nothing personal. I almost died a few days ago . . . my 15 year old niece scared my dd a little, and the only person who was able to comfort her was my husband! It hurt to know I am not her entire world. Just hang in there, you'll be #1 again tomorrow!!!!!!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    411

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    Oh Erin....I am so sorry that you are so sad right now. I know that Haylee loves you to pieces. She was probably just having a moment today, and I am sure that things will be different tomorrow.

    I work as well and my ds stays with my mother when I am at work. When I come to pick him up he usually starts to get so excited and will crawl right over to me. Last week I came to pick him up and he crawled away from me and wanted to be with my mom instead of me. I felt the same way that you do now....it is hard. A few days later I was dreading to come and get him because I thought that he would do the same thing, and I didn't want to go through that again, but he did the complete opposite. I came in and he wanted to be with me. Our little babies seem to be coming into their own personalities and they have their moments like anyone else. I hope that you feel better. Hugs... .
    Mommy to three amazing little ones...Noah {4/12/06}, Leah {3/21/08}, and Isaac {6/18/10}. Loving every moment!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Charleston SC
    Posts
    2,601

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    I am so sorry that happened to you.. I would be a mess just like you were...being a nanny before I had Thomas I did have this happened to me and it made me feel terrible!! Sometimes at this age, transition is tough...like all the sudden I am playing and then mommy means that it is time to go home...I promise that it will just be a faze and like the above poster said you will be #1 again before you know it! Even now, I have not kept Rylie since about 4 months ago and we ran into them in town and Rylie immediately said, "Bye mommy, I want to go with Brittan" it does not mean that she loves her mom any less just that she know that we have loads of fun when we are together...

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
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    Not around here as much :(
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    12,132

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    Oh mama! I have nothing profound to offer just some extra hugs .. it's not permanent.. I know you know that... it will not happen always though it may happen again - just know she loves you... they change a lot. today she was just having one of those days... KWIM - like some days when you just can't imagine huggin or being aorund DH???

    HTH!!!!!!!

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  6. #6
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Bryan, Texas
    Posts
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    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    Erin this happens a lot with the triplets I watch. They cry when mom leaves...then they cry when she gets home and then they cry when I leave! Its called "caregiver transition". At least that's the fancy term I came up with one day. She is probably just bummed that she had to quit playing...not that it was you personally that she didn't want. This too shall pass.

    Hugs to you mama, your sweet haylee loves you a lot...she'll be in your arms wallowing all over you again in no time!


    Leslie
    All over the world there exists in every society a small group of women who feel themselves strongly attracted to giving care to other women during pregnancy and childbirth. Failure to make use of this group of highly motivated people is regrettable and a sin against the principle of subsidiary. ~ Dr. Kloosterman, Chief of OB/GYN, Univ. of Amsterdam, Holland


    **Leslie**

    Mama to:
    Shiloh (5/6/06) Nursed for 13 months and Josephine (7/26/08) Nursed for 23.5 mos Currently nursing my new little firecracker, Finley Catherine, born on the 4th of July!!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    18,063

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    All my day care kids did that from time to time, what did your dcp do?
    I used to help them with thier coat and give them one last big hug.

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
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    8,591

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    Thanks for the kind words and , ladies. That's why I came here...I knew you would have comforting things to say! I know all those things in my heart too, and Kim (kst7399) reminded me last night that it was a good sign, that we had raised such an independant little girl. I just wish it had waited a little bit before she realized she would rather play with her friends than be at home with her mama! And in my heart I know it was a reflection of how warm and caring our sitter is, how much fun she has with Athena, and how comfortable Haylee is in her own skin, but in the back of my mind I felt (and of course still feel) insecure, and I wonder if she doesn't love her sitter more than me. I know that it is foolish, but sometimes I wonder. Its hard being a working mama, for that reason. And I know that having a sitter situation and not a daycare situation is worse for that reason, b/c she has one care provider to bond with, and their bond is sooo strong. Its wonderful and heartwrenching at the same time.

    I think the hardest part is she never cries when I leave her...so I feel like sometimes she wants to be there more than at home. And who can blame her...I am sure Athena (the 21 month old) is much more fun than mama is...she runs nonstop, gets into things, and is totally carefree. I try to be that way too, but I get worn out running up and down the hall and Athena doesn't .

    Anyway...I am still very sad this morning, but I know that she loves me, deep down. Its just a new phase, and you're right, Eme, in a few days/weeks/months she will be clingy and I will wonder where my independent little girl went. This has renewed my desire to find a way to work at home though...and to do something different. I am searching...if anyone has any grand schemes, let me know.

    I love you girls! Thanks so much!

    Erin
    Wife to a grizzly
    Mama to my little deer (12/05) my loving bear cub (9/07--), and our little tiger (3/22/10)
    Born by one c-section and 2 amazing VBACs


    Miles in 2012: 350.5/900 (Actual Miles Ran: 189)
    Miles in 2011: 708.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 509)
    Miles in 2010: 800.5 (Actual Miles Ran: 620)

    January Miles: 37.5/75
    February Miles: 59/75
    March Miles: 42.5/60
    April Miles: 64
    May Miles: 41/70
    June Miles: 59
    July Miles: 39.5

    227.5 miles on my new shoes
    338 miles on my old shoes

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    290

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!

    I know exactly how you are feeling! Ds does the exact same thing whenever he sees grandma, he cries when we leave, I even try to get him to come to me when she has him and he shakes his head no. It makes me feel really insecure sometimes too, but like you said it's so good that he has such a good sitter and loves her so much (she watches him one day a week). I think it can be a good sign at least they know we will always be there for them, they are not insecure in our love for them. Mamas get the brunt end of things, I guess it's preparing us for all the fun ahead. You are a GREAT mama!! This has no reflection on your mothering skills, babies are just different that's all. 's your way!!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    1,712

    Default Re: She cried when I went to pick her up!



    And in my heart I know it was a reflection of how warm and caring our sitter is, how much fun she has with Athena, and how comfortable Haylee is in her own skin
    You are so super lucky to have someone you trust and love to leave her with. And a lucky that she a wonderful playmate too. So.... many people don't.

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