I have been reading most of the topics in this forum and found it very encouraging for me I am a mom of two and with my first daughter I had no clue about anything and so I had a very hard time but I was pretty gung ho about bf and so I pumped for my baby for 5 months and supplemented formula. Also I just had a baby about 6 months ago and she is well established in bf with lots of encouragement and help from friends and also plenty of study time I made it through those first 2 weeks ....
Well now I have a friend who just had a baby boy he is about 6 or 7 days old and he was born 5 weeks early at 5lbs 1 oz. They have tried everything in the hospital to help her breastfeed but they also said and gave her the option to give him a bottle to help with his weight gain and also told her she could have atleast one last good night sleep in the hopital and they would just feed her baby a bottle in the nursery ... Also since he wouldnt stay awake to bf or bottle feed (they tried everything) they asked her to keep him in the hopital about 2 more extra days and then asked her to come in the morning about 9 to try and bf...
Well after 4 days he got to go home and I let her try to use my pump since he wont latch on to her breast I feel that he is just not wanting the breast because it is hard and the bottle is easier. Everyone keeps stressing to her to feed him every 2 to 3 hours and even if he doesnt latch on to her breast give him a bottle! Problem is the pump isnt getting any milk out and she still has to give him a bottle so she force feeds him and he still dont want to wake up. She also lacks the dicipline as a new mom she is very scared to hurt him or make him cry and she also was told that if he didnt get breast milk he would get sick because he is a premi. Then she took him to a doctor who told her he has to eat 24 oz in 24 hours and that she has to pump every 2 hours that he is loosing weight and now weighs somewhere in 4 pounds. They told her to get a lactation consultant but while she was in the hopital one came in everyday to help and it still didnt work also she was told that to get a LLL to come to her house would cost about 100 dollars ... so that makes it even worse. I have tried to help her
She came over to my house and he took the bottle fine he had about 4 oz in 5 hours which to me was wonderful being that she had only fed him one bottle from the time of about midnight to 3 pm the next day she really has no clue how to take care of him. I feel bad for her and the baby but I can only do so much. I have been encouraging her and trying to help her but this past conversation I just had to tell her to trust her mother instincts ... pray and ask God to help her establish some weight in him before tomorrow cause the doctors want to see him again, 2 days later.
It isnt working, she is a new mom and very nervous and scared for her little baby and all the doctors and nurses and consultants have been giving her different advise. My question is, is he going to have serious problem if she only feeds him formula and just stops bf! Also I dont think she has the mentality to stay unstressed while trying to get her baby to gain weight she is worried they will want to put him back in the hopital ( that may be the best thing for her) Although I do think that he can take the bottle just fine she dont think so. I think that for her case I really want to just encourage her to give him the bottle and not worry so much about bf him so she can just focus on him and her bonding and getting his weight gain up so they dont put him back in the hospital.
As a friend I even offered to nurse him she thinks thats a little weired. I told her wet nurse.... ???
Anyway if anyone has any feedback on how I can encourage her and if encouraging her to just relax and give him formula is terrible?
Thanks so much.