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Thread: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
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    Default Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    When my baby is born in late January my husband will only be able to stay home the first 2 weeks. Then it's me, my 3 year old pitbull/lab mix and the baby for 3 months until I have to go back to work.

    I'm starting to get a little nervous about how things will work out and if I'll be able to deal with the house falling apart around me. I've been saying that once the baby is born I'm letting go of that house worry, so that I can feed the baby and take care of me, but I'm not sure I'll be able to do this.

    I'm sure my husband will be helpful, but I know a part of me will want to do stuff.

    Advice? Thanks in advance.
    Mom to Colin Robert - Born on January 28, 2007

    Check out my website:
    www.nycbreastfeeding.com

  2. #2

    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    hi!! Congrats on the LO on the way!!
    I was in the exact position after dd was born. DH was only able to be home for the first few weeks then back to work...
    so now he's gone for 3 weeks at a time then home for 5 days.. But before the baby my home was spotless, everything was perfectly organized to the point of closets being color coded. I thought that i'd want to be getting stuff done and it just stopped being so important, at first it still was but then a few weeks in i realized id rather be doing stuff with dd then being worried about my washrooms!! My house now is clean(ish) but my priorities are different, all i can say is just go with the flow of your LO their only little for so long and you dont want to regret not spending as much time as possible with them while your on mat leave!


    Lindy
    Newly Pregnant momma to My little Miss Gracie with a little sibling on the way.

  3. #3
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    Jan 2006
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    just stay in bed...
    realy I'm not kidding.
    Have you heard of fly lady? She has a housemanagement book/web site.
    She realy helped me before I had my dd.
    http://www.flylady.net/

    I might help to figure out what a bare bones rotuine would be once the baby comes.
    When I have a new born in our house about the only thing that I do is laundary and take out trash. If you do a load of laundary each day and put it away it doesn't seam like so much work. And it only takes about 20 mins time.
    I figure out what we are going to have for supper and if baby allows start it about the time that hubby is going to get home from work. He doesn't mind finishing something and getting it on the table.
    Ask your hubby what hes willing to do.
    do you have any family around to help? if you don't maybe you could get a mothers helper to come in every day just for an hour or two after school. A younger girl you wouldn't have to pay too much.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    Thanks for your advice. You are right...the time is short
    Mom to Colin Robert - Born on January 28, 2007

    Check out my website:
    www.nycbreastfeeding.com

  5. #5
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    Jul 2006
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    Quote Originally Posted by andrea_ohio View Post
    just stay in bed...
    realy I'm not kidding.
    I'm really determined to breastfeed so I probably will force myself to say in bed....I like your laundry idea. That's probably the only peice of housework that won't stop.
    Mom to Colin Robert - Born on January 28, 2007

    Check out my website:
    www.nycbreastfeeding.com

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    In my professional life I'm very highly scheduled and organized. With a newborn - I gave myself permission to be relaxed and very much in the moment with my LO's needs and being aware of what his "schedule" is. It was very nice to have three months of not watching the clock, not having a schedule, and not bothering to worry about the little things. I did set a small goal every day - usually to get out of the house and take at least a short walk. My transition back to work when DS was 12 weeks took some getting used to, but now I'm very happy with my "dual personality" of being organized and take charge at work and then coming home and giving myself entirely over to my baby. We often have very long nursing / snuggle sessions on the couch in the evening which are great for both me and LO. Rather than feeling "trapped" I really look forward to this time in the evenings as down time and relaxation with my baby. I confess that I was never that into housecleaning before baby, so a little more clutter doesn't bug me at all. I totally agree with other posters to talk with your DH before the baby comes about his role and what he can do to help. If he already does things like laundry, cook dinner & go grocery shopping you're in good shape - and probably need to talk about him doing MORE around the house and things like bringing you food & water while you're nursing. If your DH doesn't currently do these sorts of house things probably a good time to start teaching him how
    Good luck!

    Lynn
    Lynn
    DS1: bf 7/2006 -> 4/2009; multiple food allergies
    DS2: bf 9/2009 -> ???
    ; multiple food allergies
    Breastmilk Donor - http://hmbana.org/index/donatemilk
    Click HERE to learn about baby led solids (BLS) / baby led weaning (BLW)

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    Are we sisters?? I'm gonna tell you that right after DS was born, even after getting up every two hours to nurse, I was up at the crack of dawn, showered, makeup on, laundry going, dishes were cleaned, living room was vacumed. My in-laws were there so I didn't want to look like a wuss. I wanted them to know I could do everything and raise and nurse a baby even without their support. WTH was I thinking?!?!

    Seriously though, cleaning house and keeping things organized is therapeutic for me. I give DH the baby on the weekend and I run like a mad woman getting things done I couldn't do during the week. If the baby decides he's not going to allow me to get things done, I'll go back into the guest bedroom and shut the door and DH scrubs the house down cuz neither one of us likes a messed up house.

    One thing I've done that really helps, I have two laundry baskets in our bathroom. One for colors and the other for whites. When one gets ful, it gets washed. I can keep up with it much bettter if I do it that way. If I can see it, I know it needs to be done. Forget the laundry hamper. If I can't see it, forget it!!! The other thing that I still only do when I absolutely have to, that I would encourage you to start doing from the get-go is napping when the baby naps. Now that we're both sleeping more, it's not really an issue but it was in the beginning. I would use that time to get everything done in the house instead of cathng up on some seriously needed sleep. When I don't seep, I get cranky!! Ask DH to take the baby for a couple of hours on the weekend to let you get an extra 2-3 hours sleep.

    Finally, remember that laundry and dirt will be around forever but our LO's won't. Cherish this time because in a few months you'll be writing asking the same thing we are....Where does the time go? Where is that little helpless, defenseless creature I brought home? That little newborn that depended on only me. The child that is now holding his own toys, starting to explore the world more independantly, the one tat doesn't need mommy to hold hom ALL the time because he's too busy exploring. Holding his own head up, rolling everywhere.....It will/does go by so fast. Good luck and God Bless, Shannon

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    I'm just echoing what everyone else said for the most part. My LO is almost 6 months and I'm still adjusting. Learning that its ok to go to bed with the living room a mess. But - your priorities will change. I work and so my time with the LO is SO valuable. Your priorities will change too and a spotless house isn't required.

    Hope this helps!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
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    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    Ah well, I'm also an A-type personality.

    My husband also only took two weeks off.

    I set little goals for myself, and I'm very organized. For example, I would do my "chores" (going for a walk, taking a nap, going to the grocery store, starting laundry, cooking dinner) when the baby just finished eating - because I knew I had a couple of hours before he would want to nurse again.

    This meant that I usually did things in 15 to 30 minute chunks (though my walks were 45 mins and the once-a-day nap was usually 30 min to 60 min). It doesn't take long to toss in laundry, and I would probably chop veggies for dinner 3x a day, just for 15 mins at a time. When my husband came home, all the prep work was done.

    But you also need to cut yourself some slack. I had an easy baby who only nursed 7 times a day (8-9 during a growth spurt). Some babies nurse 12 times a day, which means you just need to make sure you let yourself shower and nap FIRST.

    But still, at 9 months, we're behind on our paperwork (not paying bills, just entering them into the computer), but we get caught up now and then (I enter them while pumping in the morning).

    It gets even harder when you return to work, but it's worth it to me. I'd rather spend my time at home playing with the baby than vacuuming, that's for sure. So my husband does the vacuuming.

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
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    329

    Default Re: Your best tips for an A-type personlity during 1st weeks....

    AJS MOMMY: From your description, WE must be sisters.

    My DD is now 17 months and I have come a long way from the clean freak, control freak I once was.

    My advice for the first weeks, if you can follow it--REST!! Put your feet up and let the hours drop away. Nurse, nurse, nurse. Leave laundry etc to hubby. Don't worry about dinner--do take-out or something frozen.

    After the first three or so weeks create a list of three things you want to accomplish each day, limit each task to 15 minutes. If you cross off one item--be happy!

    These days I'm still up at the crack of dawn, showered and ready to go. This is leftover from the early days with DD when all the responsibility fell on me bc DH was back at work in three days and I had no one to help me. But my house now only has the "appearance of clean" and I am fine with that! It is amazing in how many ways our little ones change us!

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