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Thread: I'm so depressed, I think I will never have enough milk

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Posts
    10,754

    Default Re: I'm so depressed, I think I will never have enough milk

    She said it would be a miracle to have a full supply at this point. That after 6 weeks your supply is established and won't increase much more.
    I have to say that given how old your baby is and given the amount your baby is needing to be supplemented, I am not surprised that your LC said it was unlikely you would ever have a "full" production. I do not agree with the "6 weeks supply is established" thing, that is overly general and basically incorrect. Because milk production can be increased at any point- however, substantial gains are certainly much less likely the older baby gets. On the other hand, a baby who no longer relies on breastmilk for all their nutrition no longer needs mom to make as much as when baby is a newborn. A well gaining baby who is both over 6 months and eating solids well may well not need quite as much milk as the younger baby. So some moms find that they catch up that way...they make a little more and baby needs a little less. But when a mom has low milk production, in many cases the amount more that she needs to make to have a so -called "full" production is not a large amount. When it is a larger amount, of course it becomes more difficult.

    But also, this is not taking into account being able to get pharmaceutical galactagogues that are generally as effective as domperidone. I wonder how much experience your LC has with that? I would suggest contact Jack Newman, he has been prescribing domperidone in his clinic for a long time and he may have more info for you. Moms here have reported receiving answers when they e-mail him and if that does not work I think he is on facebook. If you contact him make sure you mention the pumping issues. I still wonder what has been going on there.

    So if you believe you will never be able to have a full production, the question is what to do now. I would suggest allow yourself time to grieve this and also it is perfectly normal and in my opinion, healthy to recognize where and when you have been failed by the people who should have been helping you.

    But then what? You will get over it. I promise you. Time is the great healer, and you have to get over it for the sake of your child. Parenting is very long and there are new challenges all the time that will take all your focus. Worrying over what happened in the past will not change the past and takes you out of the present. And little babies and kids live completely in the present and they need you there with them. But you can certainly learn from what has happened to you and use it going forward.

    Also again as I posted above- please know there are many scenarios where a mother and baby enjoy a nursing relationship without a full milk production or baby "exclusively" nursing. I again suggest the book Making More Milk. It has many supportive thoughts and ideas for moms who are not able to have a full milk production.
    Last edited by @llli*maddieb; July 17th, 2017 at 11:17 AM.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    Jul 2017
    Posts
    12

    Default Re: I'm so depressed, I think I will never have enough milk

    Dear bbv!

    I don't have many practical suggestions, sadly, but your story really resonates with mine and how I feel, so I just wanted to tell you that you are doing a great job, you are!
    You are an amasing mom and just these efforts (babywearing constantly, washing pump parts and sns tubes) - they are huge! You deserve a big hug and a pat on the back!

    I know EXACTLY how you feel and how much time it takes and how exhausting it is (I am eating and pumping hands-free at the same time as I'm writing this, the pumping bra is a savior, try it!) Please rest assured that you are not alone, and certainly not weird, being unable to EBF!

    There are so many low supply moms out there! I feel like a freak not knowing why I'm not able to EBF, and sometimes I also cry with fatigue and frustration, but really, these things just happen. And it's ok.

    (And thanks heavens for formula, which we think of as almost pouson, but thanks to the formula our babies will still survive!)

    I know how frustrating are people who say: "Why won't you stop supplementing and pumping and simply breastfeed more?" (Darn, I wish! But with the low supply the baby just gets frustrated and cries at the breast!)
    People who suggest this are not heartless, they just don't know what it is, not being able to even feed without SNS.


    I know how frustrating LC can be when they say that you won't make it to EBF. So what? Is it the whole point??? The only point?
    You know, the objectives have to be realistic. Even if we can't BF exclusively, having a combo fed baby is much better than the formula fed. It's just uncommon because moms who can't breastfeed give up. Yes, of course, with the amount of work combo feeding is!!! I looked up how much milk you need to produce for your baby to benefit from your antibodies and have better immune system. It's 2 oz per day. That's it! See, you are there already!!! And this is a priceless gift to your child.

    Hang in there. Big hug.

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