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Thread: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

  1. #21
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
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    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Haven't tried a cup yet.

    Ped was happy with his weight and doesn't want him t

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
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    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Haven't tried a cup yet.

    Ped was happy with his weight and doesn't want him to come back until 4 month appt. She wants us to keep supplementing and seeing LC as needed. It did bother me that his weight Monday was the same as saturday when he went for the sick appt (but again different scales ugh.) It was packed Monday and we couldn't use the same room aa his last eeight check appt.

    I am nervous I won't do a good job without continuing to weigh him. I just have no more confidence in myself and don't feel like I can get off supplements. I have been using the hospital grade pump but not seeing more output.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    24,794

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    If weighing your baby gives you an important sense of confidence, keep doing it! You can either rent or buy a scale for home use or just ask the pediatrician if you can stop by once a week to weigh the baby on their scale.

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
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    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    I bought a scale from babies r us and read reviews that people have used it for before and after feeds. But it isn't that precise so I really can't use it for that. But i could still use it for general weighing when he lets me

    At this point I am continuing to feed andsupplement but I can't pump as much as I should. I do about 5-6 times a day in between feeding him about 10 times a day. It is really hard to do more. I don't know how people do it more often.

    I was prescribed Reglan to up my supply and took it for a day and ahalf but I'm going to stop. It is making me EXTREMELY tired to the point where I can't keep my eyes open.

    Baby weighed 8lbs1oz at our f/u lactation appointment. He was 7.10 a week prior on same scale so that was good. He gets usually anyahere from 5-8 oz of supplement a day, but one day took 10oz. I just want to be done with this and feed him normally. Sometimes we have good feeds and I can see he is drinking a lot but other times he just hangs out on the boob or falls asleep and doesn't drink. I don't really get it. At the LC appt he only got 1.3oz in about 20-25min.

    I hope things just improve from here. I see people say that it does get better but I am wondering if for some babies it never gets better. Will we always struggle with position, latch, transfer... I really hope not since I wanted to breastfeed until 1 year at least.
    Last edited by @llli*zachary.smommy; February 5th, 2016 at 07:35 PM.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Posts
    386

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    So many hugs to you! You are working so hard and I'm sure you will see payoff soon!
    I won't add to all the great info you've gotten here about supplements, weights etc However, I thought i'd share my experience with bottle refusal and going back to work. I really liked the idea of making the best of going back to work. When I was first going back to work my daughter wouldn't take bottles either. I was so stressed about it. We were still working on latch and my nipples were still healing. Man that seemed to last forever! In our case she ended up taking bottles when I was at work or she ate frozen milk from a spoon. She did come in to work at my lunch break which was really nice and she nursed a lot when I was home. I had been so worried about the bottle situation for nothing. I hope it turns out that way for you too.
    Also, I was so glad that I stuck it out through those tough days of nursing with pain and worry. Having a newborn is so unbelievably hard even when breastfeeding goes smoothly. Even with my second child I had a hard time believing things would get easier. I'm at a point now where I can look back on those first few months and see how far we've come. I'm currently tandem breastfeeding my 4 year old daughter and 11 month old son. I don't know why those first few months have to be so hard, but I do feel a sense of accomplishment from having made it through.
    From now on, the only newborns for me will be those I can hand back to their parents.
    Good luck.

  6. #26
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    24,794

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Speaking as someone who has done the triple feeding routine- nurse, bottle-feed, and pump- it is REALLY hard. Don't beat yourself up if you cannot always achieve the "ideal" amount of pumping. Anything you do is better than nothing, so even if there's a day when you only pump once, give yourself a high five.

    I know you're wondering if this will ever get better, and we cannot promise you that it will. All we can say is that things do get better for most moms who have the determination to hang in there past these early struggles. I personally think you have a very good chance of being in that majority, because you have so much going for you. Your baby will nurse, and he can actually transfer a pretty good amount of milk when he nurses. 1.3 oz is a nice snack for a breastfed baby, and add up enough snacks and you're taking about significant intake! And you aren't using that much supplement, on a daily basis. you are doing an awesome job!

  7. #27
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Posts
    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Thank you guys so much for tge encouragement. I am left with more questions after my first day at work today... i don't know where to put this so I am just asking here.

    So the past week I have continued to supplement at the breast with about 4-6oz but some of this is formula. Part of the problem is not having time to pump a lot (or being exhausted at night if I am honest) and part is I have been pumping less milk recently at each session. I am optimistically atteibuting this to baby getting more milk from breastfeeding and there being less available to pump, but who knows. We did not have a weight check this week and I tried on my scale but he won't stop moving.... I think he was 8lbs8oz pounds, up from 8lbs 1oz last week. But hard to tell like I said, plus it's a dofferent scale.

    So today I left the baby with my mom and went to work. I had no bm since I supplemented with it so I left 4 oz of formula broken up in different bottles. I pumped 4 times at work and got more than I do when breastfeeding full time but not enough for what he would need to eat. I got around 5.5oz (can't remember the exact but in the 5oz range) over those 4 pump sessions. We leave the house at 7am and get home at 5pm. BUT here is the other issue...the not wanting to take a bottle. My mom got him to take around 2oz today with it over 3 feedings. Tomorrow she is going to also try the cup and syringe and dropper to see if he will get more.

    So here is my confusion:
    Since he already required supplements when he was bfing around the clock, should I be increasing the supplements in the evning/ night to make up for him not eating enough while I am gone? And how much should I be offering? Sometimes with te SNS I get confused about if I am forcing him to take it or other times, not trying hard enough to get him to take it. I swear I have lost all trust in this process.

    Also, how is it possible for me to pump enough for supplementing AND pump enough for the next day's separation? It isn't!

    AND, I don't want milk (mine or formula) to go to waste and it's hard to say how much he will actually take so I really don't know how much to leave. I don't want any of my milk to go bad.

    Overall, just very confused!

  8. #28
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    Jan 2016
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    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Bump

  9. #29
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    24,794

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Thanks for bumping- I meant to get back to you but then life/kids/stuff got in the way.

    Baby not taking the bottle: this is a tough issue. The only thing you can do is too keep trying different approaches. Different milk temperatures, different bottles, baby held more upright, worn in a sling, etc. something should click, if you give it enough time.

    Increased supplements at night: if baby is truly not taking enough during the day, it may be a good idea to feed him more at night. I would watch his behavior and diaper output very carefully- if he still seems hungry after feedings at night, or his diaper output drops below adequate, you may need to up the supplements. But I wouldn't worry about this yet! It's not an emergency situation, and hopefully he's going to get the hang of daytime bottles soon.

    Regarding pumping enough for supplemeting and for the next day's separation: you are right, this may not be possible! Do what you can with the pump, and use formula to cover any gaps. That's what it's for!

    Here's how you minimize milk wastage:
    - Do not mix breastmilk and formula in the same bottle unless baby refuses plain formula. Unfinished formula must be discarded after about 1 hour, but unfinished breastmilk can go back in the fridge.
    - Package your milk in small servings. 1-2 oz is plenty, if you leave enough bottles. That way if baby doesn't finish a bottle, it goes back in the fridge and the small amount that is left can be used for the next feeding. And if baby doesn't finish that, no biggie: it's just a small amount. Right?

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Jan 2016
    Posts
    74

    Default Re: everything going wrong..desparate for help!!

    Sighh...I'm back here again because there is one aspect of this I can't stop wondering about.

    Baby wants to be on the breast constantly still, and I thought this was something that shouldn't happen as he gets older or as he gets more milk ( between improved nursing and supplementing.) The only times he comes off satisfied is to go to sleep, but there is literally no such thing as him popping off and being awake and content. Is this just how it is? He is 12.5 weeks now. I just have a vision in my head that he should nurse, then the session should have a clear ending, and then a little bit later he nurses again... but that isn't how it goes. He stays on for "comfort sucking" and after a certain amount of time passes I will take him off to burp him, change him, try to have some playtime, but really he wants to be on the entire day as long as he is awake. When we have visits with family, I am just nursing pretty much the whole time and he has very little time to interact with people. I feel like this is not normal. And my aunt keeps insisting he should have time in between where he is satisfied and it is making me feel like I am doing something wrong. I just don't get it
    First time working mom to Zachary, 11/20/2015

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