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Thread: Feel like giving up:(

  1. #1

    Exclamation Feel like giving up:(

    I had ds on 4/19 via c section after a failure to descend during labour and fetal distress at 39+1. He was 7lbs and 13oz at birth. After the surgery my doctor was great about skin-to-skin and I was wheeled to recovery with my baby on my chest. The nurses were also great and helped me with trying to latch him in the first 2 hours postpartum. The latching however was not successful and ultimately he lost over 10% of his birthweight in the first two days and developed hyperbilirubinemia which made him very tired and sleepy and even more difficult to feed.

    I tried BFing him every 2-3hrs but with my own recovery this would sometimes extend to 3-4hrs. I met with the hospitals paediatrician and LC who recommended I supplement with formula for the weightloss since I barely was able to pump more than a few drops of BM myself. I have been trying a strict schedule at home with waking him and feeding him every 3 hours and pumping right after at home. Now I am able to get about 1/4 oz - 1/2 oz of BM after feeding him for 15-20min (on each breast most feeding times). The trouble I have been having is he latches for put two hours at a time, especially 3am when he wants to constantly latch for even unto 4 hours. Though his jaundice has cleared up and he is beginning to wake up every 3 ours to nurse on his own and has adequate wet/poop diapers his long hours of latching leave me exhausted and without any time or energy to pump. I am concerned this will hinder me from establishing my milk supply considering I have not even had a chance to pump over the last 12 hours.

    I am not sure if he is getting enough milk at all given his long feeds and continued use of the nipple shield most times. Our next appt with the paediatrician is in 2 days and I am worried he has not gained enough weight for me to even continue trying to BF him.

    I've been told by friends that BM can take unto 2-3 weeks to be established but the doctors gave me the impression that if it is not in by 3-7 days its better to switch to formula since "not all babies are good breastfeeders". I don't know how to proceed I feel like stopping now would be premature. I am extremely frustrated!!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2012

    Default Re: Feel like giving up:(

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*beubsy4 View Post
    the doctors gave me the impression that if it is not in by 3-7 days its better to switch to formula since "not all babies are good breastfeeders". I don't know how to proceed I feel like stopping now would be premature. I am extremely frustrated!!!
    Ugh, what dreadful advice.

    Yes, stopping now would definitely be premature. Many, many mothers face challenges at the beginning similar to what you are facing, and go on to conquer them and have long and happy breastfeeding relationships with their babies. It sounds like you are already making some progress.

    Could you provide a bit more information:
    All the weight information you have (birth, lowest point, most recent)
    Current schedule - it sounds like you are nursing every three hours, how often are you supplementing, are the supplements formula, expressed milk or both, and how much? This helps guide how much pumping vs nursing you should be doing. It is exhausting to nurse a newborn around the clock and pump, so it helps to figure out what the right balance should be to make sure you build up your supply and get baby the nutrition he needs.

    When supplementing, how are you giving baby milk/formula? eg syringe, cup, finger feeds, bottle.

    Are you continuing to work with an IBCLC?

    What kind of pump are you using?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Brussels, Belgium

    Default Re: Feel like giving up:(

    Oh, mama, this has been hard! *hug* Glad you made it here, a safe and supportive place for bfing!

    Also it's ridiculous that milk can take 2-3 weeks to come in--no, more like up to 5 days for the milk present at the birth to change to mature milk, and this could be shorter.

    Mama, agree with the pp that it can be a bumpy and emotional ride at first, and honestly many times with #1 I wanted to give up, but we kept no formula in the house so I kept up, and ultimately it worked out. It can help to set up a time around 3 to 4 months to decide if breastfeeding is working for you, and just decide not to give up before. Mama, you can do this and yes, it's worth it, and it's really, once you hit your stride, much much easier than formula feeding. It's like learning to ride a bicycle. Walking is easier than learning to ride, but once you know how to ride a bike, it's so much faster and easier than walking.
    Katharine in Belgium
    Be the change you want to see in the world--Mahatma Gandhi
    DD2 Feb 2015 - natural birth VBAC with DD (2010) & DS (2011 VBAC)
    Ouch! Is it thrush or Raynaud's phenomenon?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2015

    Default Re: Feel like giving up:(

    I think the question you have to ask yourself is if you want to ff only. If the answer is yes, that is your decision. If the answer is no, then answering the questions in pp above will help everyone clarify what you need to have a successful bf relationship. As to milk supply being set in 3-7 days, all I can do is shake my head.

    Your baby is nursing so much because that is what babies do. I wish someone had told me that in the hospital. I wish they'd said: she will eat all the time. If she doesn't, wake her up every two hours. Have someone bring you food and care for you bc you are baby's food source and nursing so much establishes your supply. Which, btw, can still change if you nurse more or less, even after the newborn period fun what I understand.

    Instead we get so much conflicting advice and timeframes that new moms think they are doing everything wrong. Or, they get confused. Or both. Unless your baby is not gaining along with the adequate pee and poopy diapers, you may not have to pump or supplement. You may just have to feed for those four hours at a time . . . But it does get better. And there is tons of expertise on this board to help you if you want to continue. :-)
    Last edited by @llli*dormir41; April 28th, 2015 at 04:05 PM.

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