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Thread: Weaning is just around the corner

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Spain
    Posts
    3

    Default Weaning is just around the corner

    Hi Ladies,

    I'm a new member of LLL so hoping to get lots of support! My dd is 13 months old and we did EBF up to 6 months and BLW & BF from then on. I plan on starting to wean her soon. My ultimate goal was to reach 12 months bf which I'm really pleased I managed to do, then I planned on gradually weaning her before the end of this year (which I've now pushed back until she's 18 months to give me more time). I love bf'ing her but at the same time I do feel it's the right time to initiate the weaning process. Trouble is, it fills me with dread! She has never taken a dummy nor has she ever been attached to any kind of comforter and I dread the thoughts of taking away what has become her comforter, security etc, and neither myself nor my OH will allow her to cry. I need to do this as gradual and gentle as possible and any tips from you ladies would be greatly appreciated.

    She currently feeds 4 times during the day (morning, both naps to sleep and before bed). She's been waking for about 5-6 feeds a night since mid June and before that she usually did 3-4 feeds a night (she's never been a great sleeper). She won't settle for anyone else, nor will she sleep without breast. I wondered if I should start by trying to get her to nap without boob during the day and take it from there. I've tried her with cows milk over the past 2 weeks and she spits it out!

    Thank you x
    Age: 40
    FTM to a little girl born in August 2013

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Location
    Central FL
    Posts
    1,575

    Default Re: Weaning is just around the corner

    if you have been doing BLW, you have initiated the weaning process. If you love breastfeeding and have no reason that you have to have her weaned by a certain age then don't feel you need to rush things.
    Nursing is a great mommy superpower for getting baby to sleep, comforting for just about any reason etc.
    Gradual, gentle, baby led weaning is likely to be easier after the age of 2 or 3.
    But hopefully others will chime in with helpful tips since I don't yet have any personal experience with weaning since my LO is only 6 months and we only started BLW a couple weeks ago.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Location
    Louisville, Kentucky
    Posts
    317

    Default Re: Weaning is just around the corner

    "I love bf'ing her but at the same time I do feel it's the right time to initiate the weaning process. Trouble is, it fills me with dread! She has never taken a dummy nor has she ever been attached to any kind of comforter and I dread the thoughts of taking away what has become her comforter, security etc, and neither myself nor my OH will allow her to cry. I need to do this as gradual and gentle as possible and any tips from you ladies would be greatly appreciated."

    It is totally okay that you have decided that gentle mom-led weaning in the foreseeable future (and this is a relationship, so I don't know how well the baby-led / mom-led dichotomy is probably false.... All of this is a two-people thing!). As long as this is your decision, and not something that you think you "should" do, or that other people are telling you to do, etc... Then if this is what's right for your family, then you know your family best!

    I don't have any weaning experience, so I'm hoping some more experienced mamas will chime in.

    Do you have a supportive partner who at some point may be able to assist with bedtimes?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    23

    Default Re: Weaning is just around the corner

    A number of people here (including me) have tried the Dr Jay Gordon method for night weaning. That could possibly be a starting point for you? If you google his name it's not hard to find. All the best

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    72

    Default Re: Weaning is just around the corner

    If you and baby still enjoy nursing and you dread weaning, why wean? When my dd was born I said 6 mos., then it was 12 mos., then just a little longer, now I am confident just telling people that we will be done when she's ready. I think I put an age limit on nursing because I thought I had to, and when people asked I didn't know what to say... it is truly no one's biz but you and your little one. Your instincts are 100% correct: not letting baby cry, desiring to wean gradually and gently, etc. And of course baby doesnt have a soother or comforter besides you, she has you, why would she want a substitute when she already has the best soother of all? Trust your gut, mama. If you and baby are not ready to wean than don't. But if you are ready to start, you have come to the right place for advice, suggestions, and encouragement!

    First time mama to my bean, born 3/2012. Still . She loves her "me's".

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Spain
    Posts
    3

    Default Re: Weaning is just around the corner

    Thank you for your replies ladies, much appreciated.

    Although I dread starting weaning it's the right time for various reasons, it's not because of any pressure from anyone that I've decided to start the weaning process soon, it's my own choice. If it was my MIL I'd have ended it at 3 months!!

    I originally wanted to make it to 6 months but managed to reach my ultimate goal of 12 months so I'm more than pleased I was able to do that for my dd. There are several reasons why I've decided to gradually end bf'ing; I run my own business from home and have worked since my dd was 2 weeks old, looking after her full tme too, and I've just done 3 months without a full day off and dd wakes 5-6 times every single night. Of course she won't settle for anyone else and I'm unable to catch up on sleep in the day due to work so I'm exhausted. I love exercising too but never have any energy to go for a jog pushing the pram because I'm hardly getting sleep. I'm also coming up to being 41 and if we decide to have another one I need to get my fertility back soon! The closest either of our family lives is a 2hr flight away so we don't have family support to help with the buisness or for me to be able to get a little break once in a while. I'm tired, feel like I'm constantly in a zombie state and need to get some normality back. Since starting blw she wakes even more at night and eats lots of solids as well as milk feeds. My OH has to sometimes sleep in the spare room so he can get some rest for work (his job 10hrs a day plus helping me with my business) so it's not a great situation.

    Anyway, I know I don't need to justify my reasons, I'm just explaining my current situation of where I'm at right now. I don't expect weaning to be a miracle cure and for dd to all of a sudden start sleeping through, but I think it'll be a step in the right direction for us all.

    I hadn't heard of Dr Jay Gordon so I've been having a little read up and it looks interesting. Like most of you though, the thoughts of dd crying because she wants boob fills me with the dread I've mentioned!

    Thank again for your messages!
    Age: 40
    FTM to a little girl born in August 2013

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