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Thread: Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    312

    Default Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

    My daughter is 19 months old, and for the most part my husband has put her to bed for months. Until we went on a family vacation for 1 week where I nursed her to sleep each night. She was out like a light. 10 minutes tops. Before that it would take 45 minutes for my husband to get her to sleep.

    We got back from vacation and for the first night I nursed her to sleep. The next night I nursed her an hour before sleep without really planning it that way, but even before pajamas and stories. She didn't ask for nursing but I rubbed her back and sang to her. She was out in 15 minutes! Awesome!

    Since I'm home with our two daughters for about 10 hours a day, it's nice to have that little break by letting my husband put her to sleep while I tuck our 4 year old in. however, it takes him 45+ minutes to get her to sleep using the same exact method as I do (for a week I have just done singing and back rub). He says that nursing puts her out like a light, so why not use that? I feel kind of guilty about this, knowing that nursing puts her out so fast for some reason right now. On the other hand I need a break and she accepts him at bed time with no tears no fuss. We nurse a lot, probably 8x per day. Just wondering if anyone else has had similar feelings?
    and Mama to two little girls

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    VA
    Posts
    40

    Default Re: Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

    My son is just over 18 months old... And I have nursed him to sleep every night for many months now for this very reason! Bedtime is so peaceful and easy this way. My husband used to take turns with bedtime when our son was truly a baby, but then it was much more stressful and I needed the help. However, you are nursing a lot more during the daytime than I am (I work full time). I love nursing to sleep, but I might not if I was feeling "touched-out" from the day.
    I tend to like following the path of least resistance with these types of parenting choices, so I don't expect our bedtime routine to change anytime soon!
    Mama to 1 amazing DS born 12/23/12! proudly for 1 year and counting! Still although he sure is getting heavy...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,115

    Default Re: Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

    Let's say you nursed the toddler to sleep. Obviously it would make bedtime faster for all concerned. But what would you and your husband gain? Would you spend the 45 minutes on something of value to you both? Maybe you'd both put the 4 year-old to bed. Or you'd have time to enjoy a glass of wine or a TV show together. If what you'd gain is worth more than what you'd lose, then I think it makes sense to use the nursing-to-sleep superpower.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Location
    Central FL
    Posts
    1,158

    Default Re: Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

    I'm still not quite understanding why you feel the need to have hubby put her to bed in order to get a break?
    It seems that you might get more of a break by nursing to sleep for those 10 minutes while hubby tucks in the 4 year old for you and then you get the 25 minutes free! Or are you feeling the need to give your 4 year old some mommy time and the toddler some daddy time? Or have some other reason you feel you need to try to avoid nursing to sleep?

    It seems like such a great super power to me that I would use it if it works. My LO isn't always so accommodating so the super power sometimes requires wearing him to sleep (which daddy can do as well as I can) My LO is only 4 months though and usually won't sleep for very long without warm body contact.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    312

    Default Re: Feelings about weaning from nursing to sleep night time

    Thanks everyone. Things are going better, I've accepted that me helping get her to sleep is faster, and it's just as fast if I just sit on the end of her bed or if I nursed her to sleep. As long as it's me putting her to bed, she settles right down. Now I combined reading a book on my tablet in the dark while sitting at the end of the bed so we both are getting what we want at the same time!

    To be honest, I've been nursing her to sleep and back to sleep from day one. Sometimes I am touched out! I love nursing, but once in a while I do want a break. Even if it's just for one session. Then I'm usually fine and back to nursing 8x per day or however many it is, I don't even know.

    She's 19 months old and I still nurse her 3x during the night. As many others have mentioned, nursing a toddler back to sleep can be different...for us it's not like when she was a baby. Neither of us are actually sleeping during that time of nursing, when she was a baby we both konked out instantly each time she needed to nurse (we cosleep). Now it's like we're both awake each time, not at all the same thing. Now I get tired. It's so funny, when I had a cosleeping nursing infant I was so well rested! Not so much anymore.

    And agreed that using the fastest method makes sense if what is gained is more than what's lost.
    and Mama to two little girls

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