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Thread: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

  1. #1
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    Default Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Well, many of you have seen my previous posts about my LO having no interest in eating during the day... well after about a month and a half of that, we had finally gotten to a compromise with eating - meaning we would go into a dark room with his favourite lullaby usually when he was about to fall asleep or just waking up for a nap. It wasn't ideal - but 90% better than the previous 6 weeks had been... Now suddenly he is doing the same thing again - doesn't want to eat AGAIN.

    The tricks don't work anymore. Its not even like he is eating more at night all of a sudden either. This just started yesterday, so I thought it was just a bad day, but today is not any better. He is getting sips in here and there as I lay on a blanket playing with him all the time and offer him the breast as much as possible. I know from our past experiences that he will eventually eat enough during the day - will generally have enough diapers and gains weight. But honestly I don't think I can take another 6 weeks of figuring out new tricks to get him to eat and battling with him every time. He doesnt exactly get angry or upset, just refuses to let me put him in a nursing position.
    I have tried absolutely every single suggestion people have given me in the past, nothing ever works. So I guess this is more of a vent post b/c I've lost hope that anything but time and patience will solve our problems. Oh yeah my DS just turned 6 months, and I cannot figure out if he is teething. I havent taken any new medications, eaten anything different etc. This is exactly what happend about 2 months ago. Oh and he hasnt started solids yet (tried cereal only once, but he didnt take any)

    For the first time in 6 months, I am actually considering the bottle - I just have to wonder if its worth the constant struggle - I just can't imagine dealing with this all the way through 12 months. I feel myself becoming a bad mother every time we have to find new ways of getting him to eat.

    Thanks for listening.
    Lisa

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Lisa,
    Why are you feeling like a bad mother? You said your baby is having enough wet diapers and gaining.....why obsess? At 6months he has sooo much to do during the day, eating may be the last thing on his mind. My child by this age usually only nursed to go down for naps during the day. BFed babies self regulate. Your job is to provide quality and opportunity. (Breastfeed on demand). The baby decides quantity. At 6months old, he can be trusted. I know several mothers here who have been through nursing strikes. I know emotionally it can be very hard. But even those children get enough to eat by reverse cycling. At 6months though ALL of our babies were distracted. They are figuring out how to use their bodies, react to your facial expressions, and their teeth are coming. Please just continue to offer you breasts often. Spend time during the day on the floor playing with your shirt off. The "snacking" is very common at this age. Relax. Trust your body. Trust your baby. Nothing you've said here is any reason to give up or feel like a bad mother.
    Your child is at the point where he doesn't want to eat every two hours. FINALLY. Rejoice! Your doing fine.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Thanks for the support DJ's Mom.

    I feel like a bad mother b/c of the fact that I DO stress out about these things.. I know I shouldn't stress out but that stresses me out more It just seems that when we go through something like this, I end up dedicating 24 hours a day to offering him the the breast as much as possible, and I have to wonder if he actually would continue to gain and have weight diapers if I didn't try this hard to get him sips whenever and wherever possible... (note he is only in the 10th percentile for weight, so he has never been a big gainer) It makes it impossible to get anything done or leave the house if the only way I can get him to eat randomly is lying on the floor with my shirt off - which I do practically all day long!

    I admit I am definitely an overly emotional person, and I don't want to be stressed out about this anymore. And I am driving my husband crazy as you can imagine as well as probably driving all of you crazy too listening to my broken record posts!!

    Anyways, I guess I will just keep doing what I am doing for a little while longer at least.

    Thanks,
    Lisa

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    I can see why you're concerned, as it seems like every healthcare professional gets caught up in the percentile charts. Is your baby active, happy? The pp was right--he'll decide when he's hungry, and will be fine.

    It's OK to be concerned--after all, you're a parent, and that never goes away. I'd be concerned about you if you were just flip about the whole thing and didn't seem to care at all!

    Lisa

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Thanks Lisa.

    Its just really hard for me to believe that my little guy (also named Cameron!!) can go forever without being hungry - for weeks on end to boot!
    If I didnt try to feed him during the day, he would go probably the entire day eating maybe once for like 3 minutes, and then maybe twice overnight. Hence my concern. Everyone always tells me he will eat when he's hungry, but he never seems to be hungry!!! Otherwise he is an amazing, happy little angel all the time!

    Lisa

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Quote Originally Posted by lf105 View Post
    Thanks Lisa.

    Its just really hard for me to believe that my little guy (also named Cameron!!) can go forever without being hungry - for weeks on end to boot!
    If I didnt try to feed him during the day, he would go probably the entire day eating maybe once for like 3 minutes, and then maybe twice overnight. Hence my concern. Everyone always tells me he will eat when he's hungry, but he never seems to be hungry!!! Otherwise he is an amazing, happy little angel all the time!

    Lisa
    What about when he goes down for naps??? He doesn't nurse to sleep??

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Lisa,

    It is really disheartening to have your DS behave like this, I feel for you, I'm sorry. I know that at that very moment that he doesn't nurse, you feel a drop of your heart/stomach and somewhat rejected. Here you are trying so hard to do the very best thing for your son and he doesn't seem to want it!! But, as the PP's say, your son will know when he needs/wants to eat and will take in what he needs. If he isn't whiny, cranky, miserable and is producing enough diapers, you are fine! Honestly, bad moms don't pay attention to this stuff, bad moms don't care about how often their LO's eat, bad moms don't wonder if they are bad moms!!! YOU ARE DOING GREAT!!!The fact that you care soooo much about all of this just shows what a blessing you are to your son. Take solace in the fact that your love for him and the fact that you are able to offer him your breastmilk at his pace is what may have to work for you guys right now. Could you take him with you places and nurse him in your car if you aren't comfortable NIP?

    Keep up the good work, you ARE doing the best thing and you ARE A GREAT MOM!!!!!
    Last edited by MomofAaron; November 30th, 2006 at 08:16 PM. Reason: spelled stomach wrong like an airhead...

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Well you guys are definitely making me feel better at least..

    When we finally got over this hurdle to months ago, nursing down for naps (and up from naps) was the only way I could get him to nurse during the day - and that was up until two days ago. Now he won't let me do that at all again - identical situation we went through before which took almost two months for us to work through, and now back to square one again.

    NIP unfortunately doesn't work either b/c as I've said, he just refuses to nurse altogether during the day except a sip here and a sip there while we are lying on a blanket on the floor. And I thank my lucky stars for that b/c thats the only food he is getting. I'm sure he is getting more than I think from those sips, as I offer it to him all day long. Its just the overall struggle that has me a mess. I can;t exactly nurse on the floor in public with my shirt off Although i would if i could hehe...

    He is seriously though the happiest little boy - he rarely fusses, and is hardly ever cranky or grumpy, so I know he's not starving.

    Thanks for the support everyone.
    Lisa

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Lisa,
    We talked about this in group today. The RN who runs it says by 6mopnths BF babies are so effective at emptying the breast they can do it in under 5mins if the want to! So he's probably getting more than you know when he "snacks". I'm glad your feeling better but I meant to post this earlier today and I forgot!

  10. #10
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    Default Re: Here we go again... :( Just venting...

    Thanks DJ's Mom... actually my little guy has never eaten longer than 5 minutes since he was about 5 weeks old - became really efficient really fast. Problem is he isn't even doing that right now.

    To top it all off, poor little thing woke up this morning horribly congested and coughing. So now the whole 'sip here, sip there' thing isn't even working today b/c he can't breath very well when he does try to nurse. Now I really don't know what to do. He hasn't eaten hardly anything today, and for once I know the reason. He seems to want to eat a little lying down but he just starts coughing and i can hear him struggling to breath so much (when he's latched) - he can't even stay latched on. I even tried a bottle as my concern right now since he is sick is keeping him hydrated, but no luck with that either. Ergg, its heartbreaking to know you can't help them.

    Lisa

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