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Thread: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Posts
    74

    Unhappy Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    My fifteen-month-old girl is in her first week in the Toddler Room at daycare, and not adjusting well to dropoffs. They tell me that she calms down a few minutes after I leave, but I leave her sobbing. Staying longer trying to comfort her just seems to prolong the sadness and crying, and I've been gently encouraged to just leave. She had been in the Infant Room with the same ladies since she was less than 2 months old, and was always happy to be passed off from me to one of them at dropoff.

    She's been more clingy at home, too -- there has been a lot more in-home babywearing (toddlerwearing?) so I can get things done while keeping her in my arms. Crying when I leave the room to go to the bathroom, etc.

    The breastfeeding part is that she wants to nurse All Night Long. And just all the time, really, once she is back with me. I took her out of daycare early yesterday b/c my mom and sister came to visit, and she just wanted quick "hits" of nursing much more frequently than she had in a while. (Honestly, I was impressed and relieved that neither my mom nor my sister took issue with it, b/c I'm pretty sure we were all weaned a lot earlier than 15 months!)

    I guess I just want some reassurance that this is normal toddler behavior during a stressful transition, and that I'm not a bad mama who is letting her be too attached to me.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    532

    Default Re: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    Sounds normal to me. You aren't a bad mama. There's no such thing as letting baby be too attached to you! A solid attachment to a parent is a normal, healthy, great thing!

    This could be from the daycare transition, or honestly, it could even just be a 15 month old being a 15 month old. Because aside from the crying at drop-offs (I work outside the home, but my caregiver lives with us so my daughter does not have to go anywhere), this is life with my 16 month old right now. This is a pretty common age for a lot of separation anxiety, and a pretty common age to drastically increase nursing demands, too.

    But I haven't gone to the bathroom at home alone in a few weeks now, showers only happen for me if the toddler is in the shower holding onto my legs, and when I get home from work, she asks to nurse approximately once every 4 minutes. We sometimes have longer stretches overnight now without nursing, but this week has been one of the "I will drape myself across your neck and stay latched all night!" kind of weeks for us. In our case, I suspect perhaps molars are finally on their way, too--hard to tell, my daughter is such a slow teether! But teeth, developmental leaps, all of those things are running wild in the second year and have the tendency to disrupt sleep at night. Whatever it is, I know that it isn't permanent, and it usually runs its course in a week or two.

    I think it's wonderful that you're responding to your daughter's needs. This too will pass eventually.
    Apologies for the short responses! I'm usually responding one-handed on my smartphone!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    2,207

    Default Re: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    I've definitely found that ~15 month-old age to be a very attached-to-mommy, wants-to-nurse-all-the-time age. You're not a bad mama, it's great that you are responding to baby's needs.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    miles from nowhere
    Posts
    11,108

    Default Re: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*sonogirl View Post
    I think it's wonderful that you're responding to your daughter's needs. This too will pass eventually.


    Absolutely. Whatever the reason for it, your daughter needs to feel more of a connection to you right now and letting her have what she needs now will give her greater security in the future, knowing mommy is there for her when she needs you.

    It does sound like fairly normal behavior, especially with a stressful transition. Could also be those pesky one or two year molars giving her a hard time at night.
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Posts
    171

    Default Re: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    No, you aren't a bad mama. It's actually a good thing. Let her take some time, she will adjust gradually.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Posts
    26

    Default Re: Daycare transition and increased nursing?

    Haha im glad I'm not the only one that can't shower without baby. Mine is only ten mos but the only way I can shower is if he sits in the tub and plays with toys or else he screams the whole time and I don't have the heart to do that.

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