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Thread: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    533

    Default sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    I'm on day 3 of a 4 day business trip. My 20 month old daughter has STTN with dad every night i've been gone (they are co-sleeping). She has not once STTN or even close in 20 mos for me - the Dairy Queen. I've got a nurse all night toddler. A good night's sleep in our bed is 2 to 3 wake ups.

    She's also eating like a champ, much better than she does even when i am at work all day. I guess because she's going all night without nursing and many months ago said no to expressed milk. I miss them like crazy and can't wait to get home tomorrow, but I'm a little bummed that my return is going to bring with it the frequent wakings. Such a perpetual mom dilemma. She wakes to eat - I am happy to feed her. But we all sleep kind of like crap!
    1st time mom over 40 to Alex(andra) b: 7/14/12

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    1,501

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Are you considering night weaning? Or just looking for some commiseration? Who know- maybe you'll be lucky and she'll decide she doesn't need to nuse at night anymore...

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,236

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Maybe when you go home, you'll want to stay in the guest bed for a few nights, or maybe even a few weeks, and let dad handle the night wakings? This could be a very gentle way to night-wean, if you're ready. Sometimes when the all-nite Dairy Queen is not right there, a toddler won't trouble to wake up as much.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
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    miles from nowhere
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    11,107

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    The other mamas have said everything I was going to say. It's such a bittersweet thing to see them grow and start to need you less (in certain ways). A relief and a sadness. s
    “We are not put on earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are there always for others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you.”
    --Anonymous

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Posts
    171

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Agree with the PPs. It melts a mom's heart to be far away from her LO and when you come back, there will be a whole bunch of things you have missed.

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    313

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*debbers View Post
    Such a perpetual mom dilemma. She wakes to eat - I am happy to feed her. But we all sleep kind of like crap!
    If that is the case...and please don't hate me (your fellow cosleeping every single night of baby's life ever, feeding all night long mom)...maybe you shouldn't sleep with her?

    We are having a very similar issue at 15 months. We are getting another mattress in about a month, for our daughter. We only have 2 rooms and 4 people so I have no idea how it will work but we'll figure it out. Night nursing used to work great, but then over time, I think I sensed that it was nursing that was actually keeping her up. She is a nurse-a-holic during the day, not sure about yours? Mine just wants her "babies" all day, all night. Last night I was so sick with an ear infection/cold that I just could not nurse any more, so I didn't. She was so mad for about 2 min and screamed, then she laid down all by herself and fell asleep on her own and was snoring! I was in shock.

    I am 100% into co sleeping, BF on demand for years, traditional cave-mama stuff. But if I've learned one thing from having 2 kids, it's that sometimes they need something different than what I expected.

    Whatever happens best of luck! I am sure she missed you like crazy, don't let her fool you.
    and Mama to two little girls

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    533

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Well hi everyone - I am back from my trip and just seeing all these responses (I always choose to receive responses by email, but I nearly always have to log in and look under control panel). Anyhoo, I really appreciate all the responses. I sort of use this forum to have a conversation with people who have similar experiences because I don't know anyone in the non virtual world who does. Since I haven't been away since my girl turned into a little walking talking human I was just kind of in awe of what was going on back home. I'm not looking to night wean. In fact, when I got back today, I walked in to take my sleeping daughter from our nanny. Her face lit up, she said MOMMY! and then followed that with 'milk'. I can't imagine a better moment. I wanted to nurse her - we were instantly close like I never left.

    She really relies on that milk - I am sure for bonding and soothing - but she also eats a very good whole foods only diet and is very independent and self-assured. I don't see her as an easy wean at all and right now i'm prepared to be in it for the long haul. At some point past 1 year I knew 2 years was inevitable - it won't surprise me if she's still into nursing past that. We'll just take it a day at a time.

    I love having you all for counsel, support and general conversation. I wish I had just one like minded pal close to home. Thank you.
    1st time mom over 40 to Alex(andra) b: 7/14/12

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    1,501

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Glad it worked out the way you wanted

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    614

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Aw, what a lovely reunion!

    I know what it's like to not have any local likeminded moms. Keep contributing to these conversations, I love having them, too!
    Apologies for the short responses! I'm usually responding one-handed on my smartphone!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    533

    Default Re: sleeping / eating better w/out mom

    Best sleep ever last night, bliss!
    Nursed down for bed by 9pm, one waking at 4am to nurse. Then slept till 7am with dad (I got up at 6:15 and came back just before she woke). At first she didn't know I was there. She rolled over into his arms.
    1st time mom over 40 to Alex(andra) b: 7/14/12

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