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Thread: Frustrated and seeking clarity

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
    Location
    rockford,il
    Posts
    700

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    https://www.llli.org/nb/lvaprmay98p21nb.html
    It's a myth that your breasts need time to refill. Empty breasts produce milk faster and have had less time to separate into foremilk and hind milk, so more fat in very small frequent feedings. Easier on baby's tummy. Not that you should worry at all about fore/hind milk. It's all breastmilk and will all grow healthy babies. Just different concentrations of lactose and fat. By stretching feedings out until you are engorged you'll send your body the message it's making to much milk.
    You both are very early days yet! I know it seems like parenting will never be anything but boobs and poop. This too shall pass is a frequently heard phrase around here. I remember being utterly baffled around 3 months (I think. You really do forget!) when ds didn't want to nurse all the time. He wanted to look at new things and hold them and babble.
    Do you have a local LLL meeting you could attend? I know it's ridiculously cold out but that's a great place to begin practicing nursing in public. It was my first meeting at a cafe that I first NIP'd. Or do you have friends/relatives that have breastfed that would be willing to go out with you?

  2. #12

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Yes, exactly!!! New babies just don't have any interests outside the breast and being held and cuddled. They can't focus their eyes, they can't coordinate their hands, the sounds they hear are just weird, garbled noise. They have all these new discomforts- like being too hot or too cold or having to poop. The only way they know to deal with this totally weird new environment is to attach to mom and stay attached to mom!

    Have you ever heard of the "4th trimester" concept? Basically, it holds that during the first 3 months or so of a baby's life, the baby is essentially a fetus that would still be gestating if it were physically possible for a human woman to still be pregnant. But it's not- the energy demands are too high, and babies can't get much larger and still fit through the pelvis. So here's this little fetus who is stuck on the outside- all he wants is to plug his umbilical cord back in. The closest he can get to that is to nurse as much as possible, and seek mom's warm cuddles and attention as much as possible.
    Thanks mommal. I'm going to take everyones advice, keep my spirits up and go full bore BF. Going to try my best to keep him full and keep him awake. I'm hoping to have him weighed tomorrow just to put our mind at ease.

  3. #13
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,271

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    Let us know how things go tomorrow. I hope the weigh-in sets your mind at ease.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Columbus, OH
    Posts
    177

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*zippy219 View Post
    I am curious, when BFing that often, would it ever be possible to leave the house?
    I just snorted my coffee when I read this! I totally feel your pain. My baby is 10 weeks now and, to be honest, we rarely leave the house. Yesterday,when my husband got home from work he said "no judgement, but when was the last time you left the house?" Ha! Days! It's been days!
    Do you have people you can invite over or someone else's couch you can hang out on? If I couldn't go to my mom's (and basically just nurse there) I'd go stir crazy!
    I will say that in the past week things have started to change a lot. She nurses faster, which means that even if she's nursing every two hours I still have an hour and a half between nursing. And now it's not just nursing or sleeping, she actually has periods of alertness where she'll look around and "play ". It's fun! But now they're more variables. In some ways it's nice and simple when the answer is always BREASTFEEDING! Yesterday the pediatrician warned me that pretty soon her fussing might be due to boredom. Imagine that!

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    614

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*zippy219 View Post
    I am curious, when BFing that often, would it ever be possible to leave the house? Between the polar vortex and the constance feeding I'm starting to wonder if he's ever going to get some fresh air.
    It is possible when BFing really often to get out there! When my daughter was a newborn, she was pretty much constantly latched. We nursed lots. LOTS. I'm talking feeds that blended into the next feeds, cluster feeding for 6-8 hour blocks of time, nursing easily 20+ sessions a day. But when I felt like I really wanted to get out of the house, we just kind of went for it! My only goal for those outings in the early months was just a change of scenery. I found that nursing in public got much, much easier for me once I figured out the right configuration of clothing to make it work for my constantly latched baby. In my case, nursing tops/bras or anything that I had to physically unlatch or unclasp were out, and comfortable tops where I could just stretch the neckline down with one hand (rather than pull a shirt up and tuck a baby under) were in! Nursing in public in the earliest weeks was a little bit challenging for me--not because of modesty concerns, but because I feel like baby and I were still sort of learning what to do, and sometimes being in public while trying to figure it out was a little bit stressful. Not so challenging as to be an insurmountable task, though, and it definitely got easier when baby got a little bit older.

    Honestly, what limited me the most in the early days when it came to getting out and about--extremely cold temperatures like we are having now (my daughter was a winter baby last year), and my daughter truly, truly hated her car seat. So it was not enjoyable for me if the outing involved any significant amount of time in the car. And my personal choice was to only put her in the car seat if I was able to sit back there with her, so that meant having another adult available for the outing. But if I had access to decent public transportation, that would have been a non-issue!
    Apologies for the short responses! I'm usually responding one-handed on my smartphone!

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Columbus, OH
    Posts
    177

    Default Re: Frustrated and seeking clarity

    Regarding breast-feeding in public, one baby step towards getting out would be hitting your local Buy Buy Baby. Though that store is a beast and I don't like going there, I have been heading there quite often to return gifts from lovely friends and family. I noticed they have a feeding room, and yesterday I planned our trip out with a stop at the BBBaby in the middle -- so we spent an hour at the grocery then an hour in the feeding room at the BBbaby. It's comfy with a nice couch and rocking chair. And the door that closes. And a changing table. And some magazines. Not at all a bad experience. I even brought a snack! And I got to return my gifts and then check off one more errand on the way home. We were out for almost 4 hours! Yeah!

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