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Thread: Glad I'm here.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Posts
    465

    Default Glad I'm here.

    I just have to say, again, how glad I am for these forums.

    Starting to get comments about extended nursing (at 17 months which I don't even think is that long). Not outright negativity, but just weird reactions.

    At the doctor's yesterday, discussing an elective procedure which is contraindicated for breastfeeding: "Well you're probably close to done with that anyway, right?" Implicit assumptions...

    At a family visit recently, after nursing down for nap, brother in law asks me, "How much longer do you have to go?" (Which is weird because he's very anti-formula.) As if breastfeeding is purely sacrificial on the mother's part, and as soon as we reach the finish line (which I guess is solid foods?), we'd leap at the chance to be done.

    Even my husband, watching the crazy acrobatics of my son trying to land his foot on my shoulder while nursing -- I'm laughing about it, and my husband says sort of hesitantly, "Maybe that's a sign that he's too old to be nursing."

    I only have one friend (one!) in real life who nursed past 6 months. Thank goodness for her at least (she nursed both her girls to age 3 so I have a positive example there). And through my local LLL group I have met a few moms who are nursing toddlers, which is awesome. If it weren't for that, and these forums, I would really feel like "the weird one" ... because I think that's what these looks I'm getting are really saying :/

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
    Posts
    365

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    Glad you're here too!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Location
    Oregon
    Posts
    115

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    Yes I know and I get some weird reactions even at just past 12 months! I had someone I really trust, who is very knowledgable about a lot of things and is a respected mental health therapist ask me "when are you supposed to stop?" I just replied well there is no upward limit or recommendation of when to stop, just a recommendation of a minimum time to at least make it to by the WHO which is 2. She seemed really shocked. At this point I can see us going past 2 for sure, depending on our mutual interest. This kid loves his solids and is such a great eater just as he is a great nurser. He's getting faster at it and that's an adjustment for sure, but he still loves it and I can't imagine anything other than self weaning as a very slow process. Luckily I've got my mother-in-law who is really supportive since she nursed by husband into childhood. My own mom is always supportive but doesn't quite get it I think (or more so doesn't get the cosleeping which I assure her is necessary for us to continue to BF since I work full time outside of the home). I feel so blessed that she nursed me until approximately 9 months since she had pretty much zero support.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2012
    Location
    Nashville, TN
    Posts
    525

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    I only have one friend who is nursing. She is a work colleague who is MUCH younger than I am (she is 29 and I'm 44), has an 18 month old and has never used formula. She just pump weaned this week and is still nursing on demand at home. I am really proud of her. And me. And you. And anyone who makes this commitment because it's by no means easy and it's like a job on top of everything else we do.

    I am so lucky - my pediatrician is like the physician version of me so I get to hear exactly what I want to hear and it's validated by her medical expertise.
    But this is our FOURTH pediatrician (partly because of a relocation, partly because the first Ped in the old city and the first Ped in the new city SUCKED).
    1st time mom over 40 to Alex(andra) b: 7/14/12

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,103

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    Embrace being the weird one. It's awesome! After all, how often do we old, married mamas get a chance to really shock people anymore?
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    California
    Posts
    418

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    I hear ya. I get similar reactions from family re: nursing my 23 month old DS. He was around 18 months when I started getting the message that people thought it was weird and "aren't you going to be done soon?". Luckily my mom and my DH are supportive but that's it. Anyway, I am glad for these forums too!
    First-time mama to Joshua, 10/29/11. 29 months and going strong! for 14 months; now finished with pump weaning!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2012
    Posts
    2,214

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    I agree, it's amazing what a big difference it makes to know that there ARE people out there for whom nursing a toddler is completely normal!

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    Austin, TX
    Posts
    465

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*mommal View Post
    Embrace being the weird one. It's awesome! After all, how often do we old, married mamas get a chance to really shock people anymore?
    HA! Never thought of it that way. Moms gone WILD!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    597

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    I have another month to go before I am nursing a toddler, but I have already been amazed at the things people have told me are "signs" to stop breastfeeding. If I limit just to things my coworkers have said to me, we have this list:

    --teeth are a sign to stop
    --eating solid food is a sign to stop
    --talking is a sign to stop
    --getting one's menstrual cycle back is a sign to stop (this is my personal favorite!)
    --ability to "ask" is a sign to stop

    I will very much be glad to be here in a month, that is for sure!
    Apologies for the short responses! I'm usually responding one-handed on my smartphone!

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Location
    Montreal, Canada
    Posts
    124

    Default Re: Glad I'm here.

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*sonogirl View Post
    --ability to "ask" is a sign to stop
    Oh lord. Because we really should reward communication and asking with a big firm no!
    Mama to Viv since 4/08/12 -- my all natural post-breast cancer miracle baby

    with just one breast. So far so good.

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