Happy Mothers Breastfed Babies
Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 month ol

  1. #1

    Unhappy Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 month ol

    Hi ladies...I apologize in advance if this is long. I have been advised by my daughter's GI doc and ped to wean my 15.5 month old daughter immediately...as in go away for 2-4 days. She currently nurses 2-3xs a day and 2-5 times throughout the night. She spends the first half of the night in her own room in her crib, then cosleeps with me. They are suggesting this for a number of reasons...first and foremost, she does not eat or drink well when with me. She is only eating sausage, occasionally, coconut milk yogurt, eggs, hummus and pasta. Always prefers to nurse. On top of that, she has struggled with allergies, and is still allergic to dairy, peanuts and cashews, so her diet is limited. Their thought is that she is relying on me and night nursing, therefore does not have a desire/interest to eat/drink. I am also having abdominal surgery mid november, which is another reason it has been suggested. And we have maintained her weight, but they fear she is about to start losing
    weight. Now, we tried Jay Gordon's night weaning with no success. For about 4 days I cut out her midday nursing session, and she was fine temperament wise, but went 14-17 hours hardly taking any food or coconut/almond milk. (In my care). She also needs to have tubes put in her ears due to several ear infections/antibiotic resistance. Since she would be unable to eat/drink/nurse for 12 hours before, the thought was weaning her beforehand. With all this info, they feel that it would be easiest for her to quit cold turkey by me going away with my 2.5 year old and having hubby take care of her. This is so difficult and i want to do what's best for everyone...to be perfectly honest, I am also ready to wean as well. It feels like the right time. Now, I rocked her to sleep for her nap this afternoon and she cried/screamed/fussed for almost 30 minutes while I held her, but did manage to fall asleep. Would you ladies suggest I drop a feeding in this fashion every 2 days or cold turkey? Cold turkey just seems so cruel, yet I do admit, when she is away from me and in my husband's care, she will eat and drink. Thank you for your help. Any advice?

  2. #2

    Default Re: Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 mont

    but they fear she is about to start losing
    weight.
    So they can see into the future?

    There are many ways to abruptly wean. No matter how it is done, it is usually very hard on baby and mother, but sometimes it is needed-for example, when a mother has cancer and requires chemotherapy. There are articles on this website with many weaning ideas, you can also find info in the book How Weaning Happens and The Nursing Mothers Guide to Weaning.

    But I beg you to do something first. Read the book "My Child Won't Eat." The author of that book is Carlos Gonzalez, a pediatrician.
    It costs ~ $10 on amazon. If you still think, after reading that book, that it is a good idea to wean your daughter due to her having severe allergies, her wanting to eat 'more" when with dad rather than you, or because of weight gain concerns, then proceed.

    I am just another mom. I cannot suggest you go against your doctor's suggestions. I can only say that IMO, with no other info, it makes absolutely no sense, when a child has severe allergies and weight gain concerns, to take away from that child breastmilk- an entirely nutritious, 100% healthy, calorie packed food to which she has no allergy. Nor does it make sense to take away from a child who is still so young the entirely healthy and beneficial comfort of nursing at the breast.

    As far as weaning due to your upcoming surgery and hospitalization, please read this: http://www.llli.org/docs/00000000000...tionsandbf.pdf

    and this: (Look halfway down page for info on anesthesia) http://www.llli.org/docs/555.pdf
    Last edited by @llli*lllmeg; September 30th, 2013 at 05:45 PM.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    19,913

    Default Re: Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 mont

    I know you came for advice on weaning, but I have to start by being critical of the advice from the GI and pediatrician! I mean, maybe these docs really can see into the future, and therefore know with absolute certainty that weaning will cause your child to eat more. But unless they really are clairvoyant, they cannot know what effect weaning will have on your child's diet. The way I see it, weaning means taking away the one source of calories that you know for sure your child will always accept. Not to mention that your child's allergies mean that you don't have a good substitute for the human milk component of her diet- it's not like you can give her a glass of cow's milk.

    The fact that the docs think that it is a good idea for you to wean cold turkey suggests that they don't know much about breastfeeding. Cold turkey weaning is not advisable for baby- too traumatic!- or for mom. If you go from nursing many times a day to not nursing at all, you're likely to end up uncomfortable, engorged, and you're at risk for nasty things like plugged ducts or mastitis. If you choose to wean, you do want to drop one session at a time, wait a few days, and then drop another, repeating that process until all the feedings have been eliminated.

    Can you tell us a bit more about your baby's issues? Is she underweight?
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Salamanca, Spain
    Posts
    13

    Default Re: Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 mont

    This is a completly pro breastfeeding forum and sometimes we forget to "hear" what the mother is saying.. I hear you saying that you are also ready to wean, in addition to all of the advice you got from your doctors. We are just mothers, we are all pro-breastfeeding (which is why we are here) but your question is, in fact, about weaning...

    I weaned my daughter really easily by dropping one feeding a day. During that feeding I would prepare her a sippy straw cup with formula. She didn't like it at first but then I bought some strawberry flavoring (Nesquik) that she really liked. (I am normally against adding unnecessary sugar/treats to such a young kid's diet but sometimes you gotta try something). I slowly reduced the amount of strawberry until she was just drinking milk. My daughter was 13 months old, she did really well with straws which is why I introduced milk this way. Your baby may do better with a sippy cup, or a bottle. You have to try different things. I would hold her and play with her during this time when we used to feed and I was offering her her new milk. She never tried to breastfeed during this time, so it was really easy as I would have never been able to say "no" to her requests.

    Soon we were down to just night feedings. Now I am trying to maintain those as my supply has dropped a lot (as suspected) and I dont feel ready to completely wean her. (she turns 17 months old on the 18th of October)

    Despite the fact that continued breastfeeding past the age of one have benefits, you have, in fact, breastfed until the age of 1 which is very good nowadays. You have done a very good job so if you feel the need to wean now, know that you have supplied her with the best nutrition possible for her delicate first year of life. Ideally we could all continue, but as I mentioned, we should all recognize the merit that mothers today have if they make it passed the first birthday! Congrats on that.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Salamanca, Spain
    Posts
    13

    Default Re: Desperate...need support/ideas in weaning almost 16 mont

    I forgot to mention... I would say unless you are absolutely forced to wean immediately, I would completely advice against that. It can be psychologically damaging to both you and your daughter and I don't understand why anyone would put themselves through that pain. Additionally, it will cause engorgment, it is not natural to stop breastfeeding in this way, it cant be good for your breasts! I slowly weaned and never experienced engorgement, it was a slow natural and comfortable process (how it should be)!

    Also, follow your guts and your instinct. No doctor should convince you to do something you dont want to do with your daughter, you will know if it is best or not.
    Good luck

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •