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Thread: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

  1. #11
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    Jun 2013
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    21

    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    Alandsa,
    Your progression sounds a lot like ours, particularly with the super short sessions followed by the on/off phase. I waited until 6.5 months to introduce solids and now, even at 10 months am only giving about 4 ounces total all day of solids. I also don't supplement with expressed milk after she feeds, I had a weighed feeding a couple of times and in 3 minutes she can extract 5 ounces so she is crazy efficient and I have a ridiculously fast flow. She will gladly drink her milk after I intimate letdown, she just refuses to stay latched for more than 10 seconds while she waits for that letdown.

    We have been simulating letdown with the bottle when I am at work, making her wait 30 seconds before getting the milk but she does the exact same thing as at the breast. Unlatches from the bottle screaming because milk isn't instantly coming out. Then sometimes she will refuse the bottle after that just like the breast.

    Meg,
    I know she no longer associates the Breast with comfort. She will cry and cry at the breast and point to her pacifier because she would prefer to be nuzzled against the breast with her pacifier in her mouth over nursing. Even if she is hungry. It breaks my heart and I can't figure out where I went wrong. I just don't understand it. I give her plenty if opportunities to comfort nurse. She only gets the pacifier for sleeping. Our IBLC does think a tie is related and we are having it revised on Monday but I honestly don't expect it to fix our issue since she exudes the same behavior when waiting for the simulated letdown at the bottle.
    Last edited by @llli*kadiebug12; August 14th, 2013 at 06:34 PM. Reason: Name auto correct

  2. #12
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    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    You have been through such a struggle-I know it will take some time, but I hope you will come to a place you feel good about all you have accomplished. If this is the end, yes, it is weaning well before you wanted, and that is very hard. But nursing this long is quite an accomplishment in this day and age even without the uniquely frustrating and difficult challenges you have had.

    I would not assume something went wrong. Child behavior is so vast and varied, some children have behaviors that are outliers from the norm, while still being entirely normal, if that makes sense.

    After a child has weaned, no matter when it happens, it is normal for mom to mourn. Keep loving on your baby, closeness and physical affection will help you both during this time.

    Did you ever try/consider a nipple shield? I have not seen it written about lately but I know I have heard of babies-particularly older babies who have never nursed-brought to the breast using a nipple shield, maybe one threaded with a tube (like a lactation aid) to simulate milk flow. I guess the theory is that babies who seem to prefer pacifiers or bottles sometimes prefer (or have grown to prefer) the feel of the silicone over moms breast, it's a sensory thing, basically. I am thinking whatever is going on, it is not entirely about milk flow, because Baby will suck on a pacifier, from which NO milk comes. So baby is ok with sucking without milk if it is on the non-skin surface of a pacifier.

  3. #13
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    Jun 2013
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    So, we are still limping along and trying to breastfeed. My daughter is scheduled for a tongue and lip tie revision on Monday so we are hopeful that might help too.

    In the meantime, she still seems willing to nurse in the middle of the night and in the morning. However, all the stress of the situation has caused me to get "nervous" when it's time to feed her, worried about whether she will reject, which is blocking my letdown. So, whe. She IS willing to nurse and wait for the letdown, its now taking 4-5 minutes to come, which means by then she is frustrated or fallen back to sleep many times.

    I try breathing and relaxation techniques and they aren't working for me. Any other suggestions to helping my letdown? I can letdown for the pump in 30 seconds so I know it isn't a physical problem (unless its her latch issues preventing her suckle from stimulating the breast well very well which the revision should help).

  4. #14
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    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    No pain? Pain inhibits letdown too.

    can you read a book, play on your phone, watch tv, something that can take your attention away from nursing and your concerns for a bit?

    When I was pregnant and had severe nipple pain when nursing, besides the deed breathing I made up stories or composed imaginary letters in my head to take my attention away from the pain. Like if I was mad about something and composed imaginary letters to the editor of a newpaper. Or I would write imaginary letters to my kid at different ages.

  5. #15
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    Jun 2013
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    Meg,
    Yes!! I am in pain. My nipples have been feeling like they did when she was a newborn. I will try putting some lanolin on them and see if working on my mental to do list will help.

  6. #16
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    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    has thrush been ruled out? Thrush can be painful for both mom and baby.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
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    21

    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    Meg,
    We don't have any other signs of thrush, and she has been examined by a Dentist so I would think he would have caught it if it were lingering.

    She had her tongue and lip tie revisions yesterday and my pain is GONE. Like, GONE, no more nipple pain. So weird - I didn't even realize how uncomfortable I had been.

    Her nursing behavior hasn't changed, but she just had the procedure yesterday so I think it would take a few days for her to know there is a difference. She did ask to nurse twice yesterday, crawling into my lap and latching on. Only for a few seconds, then it was back to playing but that gives me hope that she might still consider the breast somewhat comforting!

    Wish us luck. We're trying everything. This all started very suddenly when two things happened:

    1. She quit going to daycare and started staying home with my Mom instead.
    2. She started crawling.

    Are these possibly related? My Mommy gut is telling me she just wants to be on the move and gets mad that she can't get milk instantly and "on the go". Hence her frustration with the letdown. She is a get in, get the milk, get on with it girl with a very short fuse.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2011
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    350

    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    Do you have a good front carrier that you can nurse in? When DE was teething or distractible, I'd latch him and go for a walk. He was calmed by the constant stimulation of new scenery, I'd get to clear my head and relax, both of which helped my letdown.

  9. #19
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    Default Re: 10 Months baby won't wait for letdown, ready to quit

    Wish us luck. We're trying everything. This all started very suddenly when two things happened:

    1. She quit going to daycare and started staying home with my Mom instead.
    2. She started crawling.

    Are these possibly related? My Mommy gut is telling me she just wants to be on the move and gets mad that she can't get milk instantly and "on the go". Hence her frustration with the letdown. She is a get in, get the milk, get on with it girl with a very short fuse.
    How about, your milk production, which may have been unusually high earlier on, diminished over time as is typical especially when mom is back at work and, since baby appears to have had a tongue tie/lip tie all along, without the super flow of milk that you had before, baby eventually found it too frustrating and difficult to extract milk at the breast and so, stopped really trying.

    Latch is more comfortable for you now which would indicate latch is better and that should help flow. But maybe now that the physical barrier is gone, increasing supply a bit, or simply helping flow be better (breast compressions etc) will help. Any suck training or post TT exercises been suggested to you?

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