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Thread: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

  1. #11
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Canada
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    38

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    I pump between 30-40 oz in a day. Since I started pumping so early when I had him I have a surplus so I usually end the day with about 2-4 bottles in the fridge.

    He only nursed 10 minutes because I was in a rush trying to get too many things done before we were leaving for our appointment. So I grabbed a bottle and he had 4 oz. I've been struggling when I nurse him lately. It's upsetting because we were doing so good. I get this overwhelming feeling sometimes of feeling irritated. It's the sensation of the sucking that I sometimes can't stand. Like when your about to get your period you don't want to be touched. That's how I feel, and I felt that way with my daughter aswell nursing her. It's such an awful feeling, when the moment should feel nurturing, bonded and special. I only feel like that half the time and when I feel like that I have a pity party while grabbing his bottle. Once I get back to him we get all nestled up and I feel at ease. I feel like that is how I should feel nursing.

    Nothing else has been tested for or talked about besides the eczema and seeing a dietician and dermatologist. One of the ped's said that maybe a dietician would be able to help concentrate his feeds. I don't really understand how you can concentrate a feed, to get more calories? doesn't make sense to me.

  2. #12
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21,107

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    You're right, that thing about the dietician makes no sense! Unless the dietician is going to suggest taking your milk and making some "double cream" bottles. (Allow 1 bottle to settle in the fridge, pour the separated cream into a second bottle and feed that "enriched" bottle to the baby.)

    Pumping 30-40 oz of milk per day is really over the top- most breastfed babies max out their intake at 30 oz.

    Did anyone suggest taking the baby to an allergist? Excema is often associated with allergies.

    The feelings you're experiencing- they sound like what I experienced when my children were much, much older (like 3 years old), and I considered them normal at that point. But they could be dysphoric milk ejection reflex: http://d-mer.org/
    Last edited by @llli*mommal; August 8th, 2013 at 05:00 AM.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #13
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    5,593

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    A baby can only hold so much. If baby is being fed what is a normal (or even more than normal) amount for an infant this age with bottles, your baby is very likely going to lose all interest in breastfeeding. Why should baby nurse if baby is full?

    I am very confused as to how you can make so much milk and your baby be gaining so slowly, unless this is just who your baby is, size-wise.

    Have you considered getting a second medical opinion? Can you see an independent, private practice IBCLC to have baby’s ability to transfer milk at the breast assessed? I think you need to find some breastfeeding friendly and knowledgeable health care providers. A baby who is getting this much breastmilk and is not gaining well may have some other health issue that is being overlooked because everyone is assuming the issue is the breastfeeding. Contrary to popular belief, when there are weight gain issues, Breastfeeding/breastmilk are not always the problem or the entire problem.

    Is the feeling of irritation new? Maybe you are simply exhausted and worried and this is how it manifests. How can you be totally happy nursing your baby when your baby is possibly not gaining well and you are worried? Of course you feel irritated with this situation, who wouldn’t? If my baby was gaining poorly even though I had normal milk production and everyone was telling me to pump, give bottles, chart everything in minutia, and basically insinuating the whole thing was my fault, I would be seriously irritated as well.

  4. #14
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Canada
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    38

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    The ped that was looking after his spinal ultrasounds suggested the dietician and the dermatologist. My family Dr said that there would probably only be one appointment with the dermatologist but to ask the dermatologist to do an allergy test for cats. The ped that my family dr sent me to for the eczema, I felt, was an idiot. Every appointment we had it felt like it was a rush to get us out the door. I've also complained to all 3 dr's about the hydrocortisone cream he is on. I don't like it, but they all keep telling me to use it because in the end it is going to help him. At first he was on the .5% and now he's on the 2%. This all started when he was 2 1/2 months old and he's pretty well been on the cream since then. I keep asking about an elimination diet for myself and no one will tell me where I should start. One says it could be something I'm eating and then another tell me it's not usually a food issues because those would come and go quickly. Sigh.

    I'll have to look into the IBCLC. My husband is on paternal leave and we don't have any coverage. Unsure if it may be covered by MSP or not. I figure after seeing 3 different dr's and essentially getting all the same answers, I'm unsure of where I could look to get another opinion. Or if I should just wait for the dermatologist appointment and talk to him/her about it.

    Too me it isn't new, because like I said I felt like it with my daughter aswell. It didn't happen the first few months but like with my daughter it's been a battle for myself to nurse. So maybe it is from worrying. In my mind I figure if his weight gains aren't good then maybe he's not taking in enough when at the breast, so I offer him more bottles rather then more breast. Then I see my output and see what he's drinking and then I'm just puzzled and confused. And the cycle just keeps repeating. It's really frustrating.

  5. #15
    Join Date
    Sep 2012
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    rockford,il
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    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    Excema and slow weight gain can be indicators of allergy. If you are willing to try eliminating things, start with dairy. Its the number one. Soy is second and I've heard they sometimes both need to be cut out. After that are eggs, wheat, shellfish, fish, peanuts, and tree nuts. Cut out one food at a time. I noticed a huge difference cutting out dairy in a week but it can take up to six. Keep bugging your ped about seeing an allergist, though.
    Have you looked into buying or renting a precise digital scale to do before and after weight checks? It can be a bit of work but if it proved to you he was getting enough at the breast, then you could cut the work of pumping and bottle preparing down. I do agree you should see an IBCLC. You obviously make enough milk so if weights checks signal he's not transferring at the breast, WHY? If he is transferring enough maybe she can refer you to a doctor with a better understanding of WHY he's not gaining well.

  6. #16
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
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    5,593

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    protocol for allergic proctocolitis in breastfed baby from academy of breastfeeding medicine. Has a suggested food elimination procedure.

    http://www.bfmed.org/Media/Files/Pro...ish_120211.pdf

    The reason I am suggesting an IBCLC is to rule out the possibility your baby is unable to transfer milk well, and to figure out why and what to do abotu it if that is the situation. You make enough milk, so the next thing to figure out is if for any reason baby is unable to get the milk effectively.

    If your baby is able to transfer milk effectively, then baby can get enough milk at the breast, and there would be no need for all this pumping and supplementation wiht bottles that is quite possibly going to cause some major breastfeeding issues, plus is very exhausting for you.

    I am not unsympathetic to money concerns, my husband has been out of work 6 months and it’s terrifying. But if you step back and look at the big picture, IBCLC appointments are very affordable.

    I do not know where you live, but a appointment with a private practice IBCLC in the US generally runs from about $75 at the very low end to $300.00 at the very high end. Mostly appointments fall in the $100 to $150 range. This is for an appointment that lasts a minimum of 90 minutes with someone who actually understands breastfeeding, can assess if there are any issues, and give you a plan to fix them. Often a follow up appointment is not needed and even if it is, typically a follow ups are less expensive because they are shorter. Until just a few years ago, almost no insurance plans ever covered one cent of an IBCLC appointment, yet it was a steadily growing field. Why? Because for a couple hundred bucks tops, breastfeeding could be saved-a tremendous health benefit to child and mother- even when there were really difficult problems. In other words, It’s the greatest bargain in health care, whether insurance covers it or not.

    Plus, some areas have free or low cost options for lactation assistance. To find out if there is anything local to you, I suggest, contact your local LLL, breastfeeding coalition, WIC office (if in the US and even if you do not qualify for WIC, they may know of some program) talk to your hcp’s about what is offered etc.

    here is info on what to expect at an appointment with an IBCLC http://cwgenna.com/lconsult.html
    Last edited by @llli*lllmeg; August 9th, 2013 at 06:25 PM.

  7. #17
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    38

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    I live in Vancouver, Canada. I phoned around and am just waiting to hear back from one place to book an appointment.

    We went in for another weigh-in today and from last week he lost 1 1/2oz, he was 14lbs 8.4 oz The last week I have been charting and he's taken in anywhere from 24-36oz. Sometimes when I try to give him more he spits up more. When he has a lower day the next day he has a higher day. He is still sleeping through the night, so if he's not waking during the night he must be getting enough. Seems to eat every 2 1/2 - 3 hrs. I've been pumping more since being on antibiotics so I am still pumping between 30-40 oz. I am just baffled and frustrated. The health nurse/LC gave me a letter of concern to take to my doctor, even she was baffled. We see the dietician on the 28th. Still waiting for the Pediatritian from Children's hospital to call with an appointment. I'm at a loss as to what more I can do. A nice confidence boost.

  8. #18
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,107

    Default Re: Feeling...discouraged and disapointed

    Mama, this really is baffling!!! 24-36 oz should be ample intake to ensure growth- most babies top out their intake at around 30 oz. It really suggests that there is something else going on here. Allergies, perhaps?
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

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