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Thread: Upper Lip tie

  1. #21
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    21,271

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*auderey View Post
    seriously. there is no limit here!!!! stop feeling bad for using a help forum for help
    And just by asking questions and sharing your experience, you're contributing knowledge. Trust me, there's going to be someone out there devouring your posts, wondering how you handled this issue and how everything turned out- because if YOU could breastfeed despite these issues, then so can she.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  2. #22
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    164

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Thanks ladies.

    After a night of baby waking up every hour to eat and our getting absolutely zero sleep, my husband said to me "I think there's something wrong with your milk."

    So I made the baby a bottle of formula and told him I want a divorce.

    This whole thing is causing us so much stress that I am not sure I'm not just making matters worse by insisting on trying to breastfeed. I'm fed up.

  3. #23
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,271

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Ugh. People always talk about how babies need to come with manuals- but marriages need to come with manuals, too. With a special section on how marriages function- and don't- after the arrival of a new baby. And there needs to be a list of "Things Not to Say to Your Wife After She Has a Baby"- and "I think there's something wrong with your milk" would be in the top ten.

    Hang in there, mama! And don't divorce him. Yet. The stress is temporary, I swear!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #24
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    middle of IA
    Posts
    1,882

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    double ugh. it really sucks to not have a husband who's supportive of breastfeeding. if you think he actually IS supportive and just doesn't know what the right thing to say, then i think it might really help him to read some stuff about normal breastfeeding (like Womanly Art of Breastfeeding) or to talk to another dad whose partner breastfed. sometimes dads really think they're being helpful when they offer a bottle - like they're letting you off the hook.

    if he really ISN'T supportive, then you might need to talk to him about setting some limits on his opinion and "helpfulness". because it absolutely is worth it to breastfeed your baby.

    and this probably won't make you feel better, but all of us have nights like that, even if nursing was always easy and smooth and problem-free. it's just in your case, since nursing is not easy, it's getting blamed.
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  5. #25
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    Location
    NY
    Posts
    614

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*auderey View Post
    and this probably won't make you feel better, but all of us have nights like that, even if nursing was always easy and smooth and problem-free. it's just in your case, since nursing is not easy, it's getting blamed.
    Yes, this! I promise that rough, up every hour nights happen to all sorts of babies/families. Formula fed babies, too. It's not you. It's not your milk. Just a bad night. Hang in there!

  6. #26
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    164

    Unhappy Re: Upper Lip tie

    Up til that comment he was amazingly supportive. He's practically an extension of me when I attempt to latch. He as just frustrated because last night wasn't an anomaly. It's really been like this since we left the hospital. I think most people would have given up by now. He has supported me every step of the way.

    Baby laches now. I never thought he would. But the raw red rings around the base of the nipple indicate that he's only on the nipple. Do they get ANYTHING when only on the nipple? And how do I get him to open his mouth to latch? I have to cram nipple and areola in his tiny slit he gives me. These are my main unanswered questions. At this point I think they're the most important and the harder to answer.

  7. #27
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    21,271

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    When a baby is ONLY latched onto the nipple, the amount of milk he/she gets may be a lot or may be little to nothing, depending on the baby and the mom. A lot depends on the mom's anatomy, AFAIK- if she has milk sinuses located close to the nipple, then the baby doesn't need to latch on as deeply in order to get milk. At least that's what my LC told me.

    Cramming a lot of breast into a teeny-tiny mouth is a HUGE challenge. Beleive me, I know! Has anyone shown you the "sandwich" technique? That is often the best way to get lots of breast into a small mouth. It also helps to wait until a baby has his mouth wide open before attempting to get the breast in. And because babies often start rapidly opening/closing their mouths when they are frustrated, waiting for the wide-open mouth can be like trying to hit a moving target. One thing that can help, if the baby is doing that opening/closing thing- is to offer baby your clean pinky finger to suck, nail held down towards the baby's tongue rather than up towards baby's delicate palate. A few seconds of finger-sucking can remind the baby that sucking (not screaming, flailing, or head-bobbing) is the key to happiness, and can calm him enough to enable a repeat latch attempt.

    I don't like the sound of those "raw, red rings". Are you using anything on them, and if so, what?
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  8. #28
    Join Date
    Jun 2013
    Posts
    164

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Not using anything yet, though I have dome lanolin.

    That's the thing. He either sleeps or makes this tiny little rosebud with his mouth. No amount of cajoling gets him to open wide. If I'm reading you right I've tried the finger technique. But because he seems to get nothing at the breast and everything from the bottle he doesn't think the breast is more than an empty thing to suck poorly on when there's nothing else and the mood strikes.

  9. #29
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    middle of IA
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    1,882

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    use the lanolin, befoer & after every feed & pump. go topless as much as possible, and leave some expressed milk to dry on your nipples. no soap or anything else on the nipples. those things should help until you can get his latch fixed. but you are working on that, right, with suck training via the LC and you're getting his lip tie clipped? when?
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  10. #30
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Ontario
    Posts
    621

    Default Re: Upper Lip tie

    Have you tried massaging your baby's jaw a little bit? For the first couple months, I always felt like it was so hard to get my DD to open up wide, and when I started putting a little coconut oil on my fingers and lightly massaging her jaw with each diaper change, it seemed to loosen it up a bit. Maybe it was just a placebo, but at least I felt like I was doing something

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