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Thread: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

  1. #1
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    Oct 2012
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    Angry Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    So I return to work mid sept. DD will be 11 months old. When I return to work I will be working 4 days on (or nights), then two days off, then three on, then five off and then it repeats. The problem is I work far from home and when I'm away at work I stay up there until I'm off then come home for my days off etc. I want to continue to nurse but I'm thinking the absences will effect our nursing relationship and she will wean. I plan to pump while I'm away to keep up my supply and bring it home after three days. I guess I'm stressing about this, hubby not very supportive either about the possibility of continuing to nurse after my return to work ( which made me into an angry irate monster last night). Also, DD isn't taking a bottle right now, which has me doubly stressed. Anyone else experience anything similar? Thanks.

  2. #2
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    Mar 2013
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    My baby is only 6 months old, but she also does not take a bottle. Never has and I gave up! Have you thought about skipping the bottle and going straight to a cup since you're talking about the 1 year point? I'm not sure how the absence will affect your relationship, but I don't think it means you have to wean necessarily. It might happen but it might not. As far as your husband not being supportive, that stinks. Mine was also not supportive of the idea of nursing past 1 year, but I guess it is something maybe he just can't understand. I think it might be hard for a guy to understand having never done that, you know?
    and Mama to two little girls

  3. #3
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    I doubt your absence will cause your LO to wean if you nurse on demand when you're together. If anything you might find she is even more eager to nurse when you are together - as a way of re-connecting with mommy once you get home! I haven't had habitual absences but I've gone on work trips, most recently when my daughter was 13 months old, and it's never been a problem. I agree with karrieperry, I think trying a cup is a good idea. Why is DH opposed to you nursing after you go back to work?

    It's normal to be stressed about the transition back to work.... For me thinking about was almost more stressful than when it actually happened.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    i think you can totally do this, too. you'll want to pump pretty regularly while you're away, but by 11 months your supply is mostly established and you shouldn't have too much trouble switching back to nursing on demand while you're home. it's also WAAAAAAY too early to worry about a bottle; i agree with the others that you can likely skip the bottles altogether at that point, but in general i see too many mamas borrowing trouble months in advance of when they'll need to actually address a stage. her taking a bottle now has little to do either way with her taking a bottle in 3 months.

    i think the *main* issue is the disagreement with DH - i assume he'll be the primary caregiver while you're at work? but again, you don't necessarily need to make that a big fight now, about something that's going to happen in 3 months from now. lots of DHs seem to have some sort of arbitrary nursing cut-off in their head, and then when you reach that cut-off point they realize that their baby is no different at 11 months vs 11 months + 1 day (or whatever), and that it makes sense to keep nursing.
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    I think DH assumed I would give up nursing because I was returning to work and that she would get more attached to a bottle, my milk would dry up etc. I don't think he really understands that its quite doable, I'm hoping. As for as a bottle goes, I've introduced a sippy cup to play with after meal times so she can learn to get the hang of it. The other issue is that she wakes every two hrs at night to feed (I personally think its habit) so DH is worried that it will be exhausting to cope with that plus get both ready in the morning for daycare then work. Thanks for the advice!

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    keep us posted!
    DS1 6/7/11
    DS2 10/29/13

    Nursing, pumping, cloth-diapering, babywearing, working professor mama with the awesomest SAHD ever.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*bonniefleming View Post
    I think DH assumed I would give up nursing because I was returning to work and that she would get more attached to a bottle, my milk would dry up etc. I don't think he really understands that its quite doable, I'm hoping. As for as a bottle goes, I've introduced a sippy cup to play with after meal times so she can learn to get the hang of it. The other issue is that she wakes every two hrs at night to feed (I personally think its habit) so DH is worried that it will be exhausting to cope with that plus get both ready in the morning for daycare then work. Thanks for the advice!
    So much can change in a few months. Your LO could be pretty regular with solids by then; she could/probably will be a pro with the sippy cup (mine figured out the straw cup in just a few weeks); her night waking habits could change. You might be in an entirely different boat by then, so perhaps you can just try the attitude of "cross that bridge when you get to it" so that you don't feel too much unnecessary anxiety?

    Also, for what it's worth, my LO has totally different expectations from me than his other caregivers. They tell me at daycare that he takes 2 hour naps, by himself, on the mat, and they can just lay him down and pat him to sleep. I'm like "are you the baby whisperer?!" because with me, it's boobs or bust, sometimes hourly! And on the occasional night when I'm out of the house and my DH has to do bedtime, I always check in thinking he's going to say he's having a rough time -- but no, baby goes down easily, without nursing, and is magically still sleeping hours later. I think daddies and babies figure out their own routine that works for them (if daddy is willing to experiment of course).
    Last edited by @llli*mercystreet; June 10th, 2013 at 02:50 PM. Reason: typo fix

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Bf beyond 12 months and return to work...


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