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Thread: Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

  1. #1

    Default Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

    Okay, l am beyond desperate. I am almost at my breaking point. I have been exclusively breastfeeding since my now 12day old son was born. In the hospital, bf was fine; since we've been home, it's a nightmare. My son is nursing constantly! He stays on my breasts all day and night. I'm sure he's getting enough (based on diaper counts, etc.), so it isn't from true hunger. If he isn't nursing, I'm the only person who can hold him. And even if I'm holding him, he often cries if not at the breasted. I am going crazy! Allowing him to constantly comfort nurse is not feasible in my situation, as I also have a 13 month old to take care of. I would like to continue bf, but I also would like to lay my little one down occasionally or allow someone else to hold him. Any advice?!?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2009

    Default Re: Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

    Hi 2boysandmama!

    I have two quick questions-1) When you say you know baby is getting enough due to output, what do you mean? How many poops is baby having per day and what do they look like?

    2) Why are you the only one who can hold baby? Is there another adult you can get help from? Preferably someone with a nice clean close trimmed pinky finger that baby can suck on?

    Life with a newborn and a very young toddler is exhausting. But I don't quite understand how changing what or how baby is fed will help. Your newborn, like most newborns, requires pretty much constant holding. Your toddler is very young and also needs lots of love, attention, physical contact, and supervision-neither will change if your newborn baby is fed differently.

    If baby is truly gaining well, there is no reason you must let baby nurse constantly. Yes, the recommendation is to cue feed, and that includes "comfort nursing". This ensures baby gets enough and that your milk production is on target. But sometimes always cue feeding is just not possible, as some mothers of twins will tell you! In those cases, Ya gotta do what ya gotta do. As long as your baby is gaining well, and your baby nurses frequently-about 10 times a day, then if you must take baby off the breast to mother your other baby, then that is what you must do. Again, assuming baby is truly gaining well, this should not be a problem. If baby is NOT gaining well despite near constant nursing, then that possibly indicates a different issue.

    other suggestions- Do you have a sling or other carrier so you can try 'wearing' baby? I have seen momma's wear baby and toddler at once, even, using two carriers with toddler on hip or back.

    -Have you experimented with nursing positions that leave a hand free?

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Default Re: Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

    with the PP. One more question for you, mama: how does nursing feel? Are you in any pain or discomfort?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Ontario, Canada

    Default Re: Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

    It is difficult, but I agree with the other posters - changing how you feed isn't going to make things easier. 2 little ones close together is difficult! The constant nursing at this very tender age is by design. Baby nurses often, establishes your milk supply, bond grows, baby is protected.

    I agree with a sling. I might also suggest that you try swaddling. Something that helped with mine was I laid a blanket under them while they were nursing. Then I'd wrap it around the top of them. When they drifted off, I'd swaddle them up and lay them down. The window to do so was about 2 minutes after they drifted off. I hope it helps! I know it doesn't help you right now, but it does pass.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2013
    Salt Lake City

    Default Re: Please help! Comfort nursing gone too far!

    I know exactly how you feel. My twins started nursing constantly at 5 weeks. It's completely exhausting. The sound of them sucking on their hands strikes fear into my heart, because I KNOW that screaming to be on the breast isn't far behind. Mine don't like slings, pacifiers, or sucking on anything else. We've gradually gotten them to like being rocked by dad and they will often sit in a swing. They like their strollers in small bouts, too. We really just had to keep introducing new things to see what sticks, and keep going back to the things they didn't like before. One Saturday, we frantically went to Baby's R Us to buy every pacifier they had. The girls hate them all, haha! Which, I guess, really is a nice compliment. They are 11 weeks old now and I can finally see it decreasing. They nurse constantly during the evenings, but during the day they will take breaks to look around and play, and they sleep well at night, now.

    I totally understand thoughts of wanting to wean. It gets to a point where you wish you could even hold your child for a few minutes without her being on the breast.My back, shoulders, and arms ache all the time. But, of course, I can't see how weaning is even possible. And I could never, ever take their favorite thing in the world away from them. So I remind myself that they do it because they love me and I keep in mind that it's a great tool. If I were an early human hunter gatherer mom and was being stalked as prey, I would absolutely need a guaranteed way to keep my baby from crying out!

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