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Thread: How to get my nursling to sleep in her crib?

  1. #1

    Default How to get my nursling to sleep in her crib?

    DD is 7 mos old and we transitioned her from nighttime co-sleeping a couple of weeks ago by putting her down asleep. She takes about 1-2 hrs to nurse and be asleep enough to hand off to DH for the crib transfer. At first she cried in his arms and he had to try putting her down and picking her up and rocking her a few times before she transferred well but now it's a pretty quick hand off and she's still asleep when he puts her down. She wakes up with a wet diaper usually around 2 now and comes back to sleep with me until 6 when she's up to go potty. She then needs about a thirty minute nap again between 6:30 and 7. Her morning nap somewhere around 9:30, then another nap around 12:00, then late afternoon nap around 3 and bedtime around 6. Her naps are all about 45 min and with me holding her in my arms and nursing her.

    I need her to nap in her crib so I can spend quality time with DS. Unfortunately she is such a light sleeper that I can't be in the same room with DS because his playing wakes her up and if I try to read to him she wakes up. I nurse her to sleep in her room in the dark and we play in there too in hopes she will have good associations with her room. But if I put her down awake to play in her crib for a few minutes during the day while I try to put her laundry away she freaks out even though she can see me and I'm talking to her. She's ok if she's on the floor next to me.

    When DS was this age he wasn't nursing himself to sleep anymore he was looking at me and the room so I could work on transitioning him to the crib awake and we Ferbered him. DD nurses to sleep and keeps nursing for awhile in her sleep. Tried to hand her off to DH this weekend for naps like we do at bedtime but she woke right up in his arms and when he put her down she cried and just started rolling around in her crib wide awake and was so tired looking from not napping.

    How do I get her to nap in her crib? Ideally I'd love to put her down for her naps in her crib but hold her for her noon nap to cuddle her since DS is still napping at the same time but will that give her mixed messages and make it hard to get her to nap in her crib? Is it all or nothing?

    Id also love to get her down faster at night so I don't miss dinner with DH and DS and all of DS bath time and bedtime routine but I don't know what to do since she is nursing? She is so different from DS as a baby so I don't know is there an age that would work better?

    She absolutely will not nap in the car no matter how long she's been up and she's hit or miss with napping in her carrier so I can't make it work that way. Please give me you recommendations!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
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    Default Re: How to get my nursling to sleep in her crib?

    Quote Originally Posted by @llli*excitedmama View Post

    I need her to nap in her crib so I can spend quality time with DS.

    When DS was this age he wasn't nursing himself to sleep anymore he was looking at me and the room so I could work on transitioning him to the crib awake and we Ferbered him. DD nurses to sleep and keeps nursing for awhile in her sleep. Tried to hand her off to DH this weekend for naps like we do at bedtime but she woke right up in his arms and when he put her down she cried and just started rolling around in her crib wide awake and was so tired looking from not napping.

    How do I get her to nap in her crib? Ideally I'd love to put her down for her naps in her crib but hold her for her noon nap to cuddle her since DS is still napping at the same time but will that give her mixed messages and make it hard to get her to nap in her crib? Is it all or nothing?

    Id also love to get her down faster at night so I don't miss dinner with DH and DS and all of DS bath time and bedtime routine but I don't know what to do since she is nursing? She is so different from DS as a baby so I don't know is there an age that would work better?
    s Mama, because my baby sounds almost 100% like yours. Needs to be nursed to sleep for naps, short naps (always 45 min to the minute, except after a Dr. visit or some rare event that tires her), older sibling that needs attention, baby is light sleeper, etc.

    Just trying to offer a new perspective, but why does she need to sleep in her crib for you to spend quality time with your older one? Sounds like you have a fairly high needs baby when it comes to sleep as do I. For me, the crib was a mental hurdle and once I let go of that I was a lot happier with my situation, which has been much more difficult than I anticipated. Have you tried a baby swing? This was the only thing that worked for us, and even then not 100% of the time. However, it closely mimicks being held and it's pretty comfy. My DD2 is 4 months and naps in the swing about 1-2 times per day for the 45 min, the other two naps are in the carrier or nursed to sleep in our bed (we bedshare). Even if you got 1 baby swing nap that could give you the special time with DS you are looking for.

    If that doesn't work or you aren't into the swing idea, how about just spending fun time with DS when DD is in a good mood and awake? That is the case for me most of the time and then she gets special Daddy time when he gets home.

    As far as multiple nap locations we have car, carrier, swing, and big bed naps each and every day and baby is very happy with that.

    Sorry if this isn't what you are looking for as far as advice, but honestly if your baby doesn't like the crib I don't think much is going to change that. She just might no be ready for that and maybe she never will be. It was really hard for me to accept that about my baby but I've reached that point now. My new plan is to move our mattress to the floor and get a twin mattress next to that and slowly transition her in a year or two whenever she is ready.
    Last edited by @llli*karrieperry; April 22nd, 2013 at 05:10 PM.
    and Mama to two little girls

  3. #3
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    Default Re: How to get my nursling to sleep in her crib?

    Put her mattress on the floor, then nurse her to sleep and sneak away.

  4. #4

    Default Re: How to get my nursling to sleep in her crib?

    The nurse to sleep and sneak away trick has worked for me too. Not always but it can defintely work. Some babies simply do not 'transfer' well, (Edit but if they are safe in thier usual spot they sleep with you, with your smell etc, that can work quite well. I have also found that my baby (now 8 months) will stay settled better if she has a little 'weight' on her-a light blanket. But the mattress has to be on the floor if baby is sleeping unattended because there is the danger baby will roll/crawl off.

    With my oldest I would sort of "swing" him down into the crib-after he was asleep, with my arms extended, I would swing/rock him back and forth, back and forth, lowering a little each time, gently gently down into the crib. It worked pretty well. But eventually we gave up on the crib all together, We found life easier without it. For our baby this tiem, it did not even come out of storage. I have a pack and play for when I need a safe place to put my baby down. (end edit)

    Just to reassure you, although your baby is different than her brother, there is nothing unusual or wrong about your baby needing to nurse to sleep or sleeping best when next to you or being held by you. Also babies this age typically want to keep mommy in sight, including my 8 month old. This is entirely normal. Perhaps she knows that 8 month olds who are not close to their mothers at all times are at a very high risk of being eaten by anything bigger than she is. Oh, not in the suburbs in 2013? But my baby does not know it is 2013.

    I also have my baby 'helping' me with the laundry and I take her to the bathroom with me because she cries if she cannot see me. I do lots of things with my older boys one handed, even bedtime routines etc, including massages for my 6 year old, becasue the other arm is for baby (yes she is getting heavy!) She sleeps in my arms or next to me most of the time. When he is home, my husband and I switch off, but there are certainly times she wants me and me ONLY. Except at night, it is always light, (and in the evenings I have lights and the tv on.) During the day, her big brothers make plenty of noise. She may startle awake but soon is asleep again with some nursing or other comforting. This is what I did with my older kids as well and they have no sleep issues at all. I am not saying this is what you should do, I am saying, this is what I did and, despite it being a sleep trainers nightmare, it’s what worked best for my family with only positive effects.

    What I am trying to suggest is that you are not giving your baby a mixed message by holding her while she sleeps. You are giving her a very clear message-that you love her and want her to be safe, which, clearly, to her mind right now, is in your arms or beside you. Maybe a sling or some other baby carrier will work for you. This age she might like being in a backpack.

    If you are concerned that your baby will never learn to sleep alone if she is not trained to do so, or that she will develop poor sleep habits, don't be. There is simply not a shred of evidence that this is true. Sleep training has been shown in studies to 'work' in the short term but not in the long term. Simply out, a baby who is sleep trained at, for example, age 8 months may sleep a longer stretch than one who is not sleep trained. But 6 months later, those sleep differences are gone. There is much more to what the research shows and does not show, and I suggest this website for further info on all aspects of normal infant/child sleep including sleep training, if you are interested. http://www.isisonline.org.uk/how_bab...leep_training/
    Last edited by @llli*lllmeg; April 22nd, 2013 at 09:23 PM. Reason: remembered something else totry

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