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Thread: Needing some support - exhausted!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2012
    New York

    Default Needing some support - exhausted!

    My DD is 1 year old!
    Yay we made it to one years BF'ing and I love it.

    However, the last month has been terrible.

    She still doesn't sleep through the night, feeds maybe 5 times if not more, I ended up getting a UTI (god knows how I haven't had sex with my husband for more than 6 months!!) and that stressed me out - took antibiotics, it didn't heal and had to get a kidney/bladder scan - long story short it turned out everything was fine - but I'm a hypochondriac so that also stressed me out beyond belief - I thought I had kidney failure.

    (I suffer from an anxiety disorder but not on meds and it's really starting to get to me)

    Next I got a cold and of course my DD got it as well, she ran a high fever fir two days, woke every hour and one night pretty much slept on the breast, in turn I didn't get any better.

    Then a week later - just as I was starting to feel better I got a major herpes attack on my leg!!!

    I thought it was bed bugs, my husband was really stressed about this as he recently just lost his job and we are literally down to our last pennies.

    So I took myself to ER after it looked like it was getting infected, turns out it was herpes - shingles maybe, however it was infected and I needed antibiotics - so again on the antibiotics,
    and the herpes medication, (I can't spell it)

    So there I was still with a cold, still a sickly daughter and shingles infected on my thigh and on Clindamycin - stressed out, still not getting any sleep and a cold that started getting worse!

    Now its my last day on the antibiotic - and with a cold that isn't getting better.

    I've been asking my husband for help and he's been trying to help but he's up late - going to meetings, trying to sort out a job so we can stay in NY and not go back to our parents.

    I"m literally exhausted, I am not coping and my daughter who is still a bit sickly (it's been 8 days) still feeds all night and has taken to waking up at 5.30 wanting to get up!

    Please tell me I"m not alone in this?
    Has anyone experienced such stress and did you get through it?

    I want to night wean but too exhausted to ironically.
    All I want is one good nights sleep or my husband to help out, my relationship with him is terrible at the moment and I feel completely unsupported, also because I"m a hypochondriac and don't sound sick he's telling me it's all in my head.

    Anyway - I love my daughter beyond words and just want what is best for her but I'm losing my mind!!

    Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated or please share stories ----- this is just me reaching out.

    I don't have many friends in this city and none that have had babies!

    Thanks so much - sorry for the long winded post!!!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Oct 2012

    Default Re: Needing some support - exhausted!

    Oh mama, that sounds like such a rough stretch. I've been sick for over a month too, also on antibiotics, it seems like as one thing gets better another gets worse! Hang in there. It WILL get better. Eventually baby WILL sleep through the night. The shingles, UTI, etc WILL get better. Baby will get better. Maybe in a few days or a few weeks but you'll get there. In the meantime, try to give yourself a break. Go to bed early. Let non-essential stuff slide. And when you're feeling a little better, a little less exhausted, try to have a little time with your husband to re-connect. It sounds like you're both going through a lot. But even an hour or two together in the evening can help. And for the anxiety - it sounds like money is tight right now - but you might want to see if there are any resources for sliding-scale fee therapy, or groups you can go to - something to help talk through what you are going through? Your pediatrician, ob, or primary care doctor may be able to refer you.

  3. #3

    Default Re: Needing some support - exhausted!

    No ideas, but I'm in a very similar boat. I have a 4 year old and 1 year old... both have always been very high demand. My hubby is finishing the last few weeks of a very intensive school...he is up all night trying to get assignments done before the deadline and gone all day. After school is over, I have no idea how we are going to get by. He's still looking...and we are in NJ so high COL. I work, but it's seriously slacking because of exhaustion and stress...and there are no more hours I can take, I wish their were so I could get away. The baby is still up at night...his favorite is getting up at 2ish and staying up til maybe 4...just in time for me to fall asleep and be waken by the hubbys alarm...then everyone's usually up by like 7ish. He also likes to mix it up and wake every 2 hours sometimes. CIO is no where near an option as he gets hystrical, and he absolutely refuses to sleep in my bed...that means time to to go crazy and harass his sister (who does sleep with me cuz I'm too tired to fight it.

    I have no friends or family here...closest is 5 hours and they are broke and caring for autistic kids.

    Life has gone insane. The house is a disaster since the hubby has no time to help and I am burnt out. Poor daughter barely gets attention because the baby is so wild and when she does, I'm so tired and depressed I'm faking it...and not well. YesterdayI just sat there staring at the baby screaming in his pack n play because I just could not take chasing him nor could I bring myself to care that he was yelling.

    I've got 6 weeks until DH is done with school and I can get a day "off" but I'm not sure I'm going to make it lol!

    Anyways...maybe it helps to hear you are not alone!

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