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Thread: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failure!

  1. #1

    Default Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failure!

    My 11.5 month old is refusing to nurse in the day. Again. I have ranted on this forum for quite a few times about this. He used to nurse every 2 hours on both sides. Now he will not nurse more than 4 hour intervals. Only one side. And that's after I 'force' him. He has always been on the small side. His weight is even lower than 5 percentile now. He's not very interested in solids yet (doing bls). I feel like i'm a big failure and I'm so depressed now. I've tried various methods - dark room, nurse lying down, rocking/bouncing, but he acts like he hates my breasts. I'm certain he will starve/dehydrate himself to death at some point!
    He's teething all the time since 6 months. I don't know if teething is the cause.
    He does nurse at night. We co sleep and I'm not awake enough to count the number of times. As a result my sleep is crap. I ache all over. I can't sleep in the day because, well, i just can't. Now my breasts are in pain too because of the engorgement. I'm reluctant to pump because I don't know when he will want to nurse. I'm so desperate now I want to cry. Hubby does not understand anything I'm going through and you ladies are all I've got to stay sane. I dont know what to do now. Please help me out. Thank you!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    2,476

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    At 11.5 months, they're brutally distractible. It's frustrating for sure. At this age, you tend to get 'drive by' nursing. They swoop in, nurse for what seems like 3 minutes at best, and run off again. You know they didn't get enough.... However at this age, they are very efficient nursers. You might be surprised at how efficient they are.

    I probably would NOT go into another room. His fussiness may be due to being removed from 'the fun'. They really hate to miss anything at this very curious stage. He doesn't hate your breasts. But he probably does hate being removed from whatever it was that he was doing. Let the fun continue, read his queues and let him nurse as he wants. Nurse in the middle of everything. I'm now nursing my third and I know she'd have a fit if I took her away from her sisters every time we nursed. You just come to accept the various short 'snacks' and the spontaneity of them. Working with them rather than against them helps.

    I don't know if that will help, but it might.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
    and

  3. #3

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    But he doesn't even latch on AT ALL! I'd be happy if he nurses for 3 full minutes!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    2,476

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    I'm sorry, I can hear your frustration. I don't know what you've read or having read, but here's a list of hits from "nursing strike" on Kellymom. Maybe one or two of the articles will help. Best of luck Momma.

    http://kellymom.com/?s=nursing+strike
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
    and

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    Cleveland, Ohio
    Posts
    9

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    I understand how you feel but I'm envious that you made it to almost a year! My son quit on me just after 6 months and I'm heartbroken. I still offer,hoping he'll come back but no luck yet. I especially understand how tough it is t try to 'wait them out' and not pump, and then deal with the resulting engorgement, and in my case, constant plugged ducts. I about drove myself mad constantly debating whether I should go ahead and pump or if he would change his mind before I plugged up. I wish you luck and patience, but you are not a failure! You've made it incredibly far!

  6. #6

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    I forgot to update: lo is back to nursing just fine now. Turns out he was cutting not just 1, but 2 teeth! One remaining incisor and his first canine. No wonder he was so cranky! Scared that hell out of me though!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    2,476

    Default Re: Almost 1 year old rejects the breasts. Feel like a failu

    Oh wonderful news!! Good for you for sticking it out.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!
    and

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