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Thread: 10 week old attached all night

  1. #1

    Default 10 week old attached all night

    Hello, this is my first time posting. I'm seeking help because I'm feeling overwhelmed by my baby nursing ALL night long. She is 10 weeks old. I understand babies go through growth spurts, but this seems more like a preference than a need for milk. It's like she can't stay asleep unless she's attached. I've tried pacis, to no avail. I remember dealing with all night nursing with my boys, but not until much older. She just can't stay asleep without the boob in her mouth.. can anyone shed some light on this for me? I'd appreciate it. I'm so tired and almost ready to try a separate sleeping space for her.


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    COUGARTOWN Baby! From here on in!

    Default Re: 10 week old attached all night

    Stop trying to pull her off. If a baby isn't in a deep sleep this just wakes them up and you have to start the process all over again. Once she falls asleep watch clock. Do not try to unlatch the baby for 15minutes AFTER it seems like she is asleep. If that is a problem than try 20 minutes. That specific issue is generally about a mother who is eager to get away from a sleeping baby. But you have to invest the time to get them to sleep deeply before popping them off. It at any point while you are waiting, she pops off on her own then you should be OK. But if she is still latched wait 15-20 BEFORE trying to disengage. I know it seem like forever. But it's really NOT in terms of how long you will have to stay there is she keeps waking up because she wants you with her and you want to leave. Which really that cycle can last for HOURS.

    Way too lazy for formula

  3. #3

    Default Re: 10 week old attached all night

    I actually fall asleep while she's nursing and KNOW that she remains latched for hours on end... Maybe I'm waking up at the time that she's not in a deep sleep and when I try to get her off, that's what triggers her waking. She literally has been attached for most of the night at least 5 out of the last 7 nights. Last night was a good night. She only woke up twice to nurse and she slept deeply the rest of the night. There must be a reason for her need to be attached all night..just not sure what it is. Maybe her need to suck. I just can't be a paci all night. If it happens again, I will try to stay awake and then get her off after the 20 minute mark... that may help. thanks.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2008

    Default Re: 10 week old attached all night

    Those all-night feedings are so good for your milk supply and for baby! It's a good sign that you fall asleep for hours on end while she's nursing. I know sleeping with a nursing baby isn't the best sleep ever. I feel the same way. I definitely sleep better when there isn't a person attached to me. It helps me to remember that the light sleep with frequent wakings is normal and healthy for mom and baby (prevents SIDS, keeps milk flowing, etc.)

    Also a reminder that non-nutritive sucking (using you as a paci) is an important part of breastfeeding. So often we hear it minimized, "Oh, she's just using you as a pacifier." In reality it's a vital and normal part of the lactation process. Sometimes moms are able to replace that at least in part with an artificial nipple (pacifier), and sometimes that happens successfully without problems with breastfeeding. Other moms find that it interferes with the breastfeeding relationship.

    So, it probably isn't realistic to expect your 10-week-old to sleep all night without nursing, but it doesn't sound like that's what you're asking for. Maybe start with some realistic ways to get some sleep without her attached, and some of the night sleeping with her attached? Some ideas:

    - Is there a time when she does sleep better than others? Like the first part of the night or in the very early morning (4 or 5 a.m.)? Maybe start with those times.
    - Can Dad or someone else hold her for a few hours while you sleep?
    - What about nap time? Can you get some sleep during the day without her attached?
    - What about staying awake for those 20 minutes, unlatching her, but leaving her right there in bed next to you? (Maybe you're already doing that.)
    - Elizabeth Pantley (The No-Cry Sleep Solution) has some ideas that might work. It's something along the lines of unlatch baby, if she puts up a fuss, latch her back on and try a few minutes later. Lie next to baby for a few minutes to make sure she'll stay asleep, then slowly creep out of bed. This might be more geared to an older baby, but the theory of doing it gradually and going back to nursing for a few minutes if necessary, might work.

    This is such a hard time of life! Ten-week-olds are hard work, don't forget it! They are hard at two months and six months and nine months, etc. But the hard stages always pass on, and something new becomes the hard thing. I find it much more rewarding to focus on the great part of every stage. Yes, it's annoying to have a baby dependent on you for food, sleep, everything. But it's also marvelous and magical.

    Take care of yourself! Indulge in a yummy treat or go for a walk or watch a t.v. show or whatever you need to so you're at your best for Baby!

    Good job

  5. #5

    Default Re: 10 week old attached all night

    Thanks mamamia! It's helpful to have all these reminders. Again, she slept very restless last night. Seemed to barely get into a deep sleep until early morning hours, like 5 am. ah, just reminding myself, that this shall pass and soon enough I'll be wishing for her to be an itty bitty baby again. thanks for the support. Julie

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Ontario, Canada

    Default Re: 10 week old attached all night

    I know it's tough (been there, done that) but you're not being a pacifier. In truth, a pacifier is trying to be YOU! A poor substitute at that and baby knows it.

    It's not bad thing. Irritating yes, but not bad. There seems to be a very small window when they drift off at that age to successfully get them to unlatch without waking. For my girls, it was within about 30 seconds of them falling asleep. I'd do it slowly and carefully. Once unlatched, I'd wait about 2 minutes to make sure they were asleep before moving / moving them. I don't know why, but waiting longer always seemed to wake them. You'll find the 'window' for your babe too. Remember that you're still getting to know each other. You'll both figure it out.
    Mommy to our DD1 early bird (34 weeks, 2 days, 7lbs, 14oz)! Oct. 2nd, 2008 Emergency C-Section, Frank Breech, HEALTHY Girl!
    Weaned @ 17 months
    Our DD2 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 12oz) Aug. 10th, 2010 Our Successful VBAC, growing like a bad weed!
    Weaned @ 15 months
    Our DD3 early bird (37 weeks, 3 days, 7lbs, 6oz) Feb. 16th, 2012 Our 2nd VBAC and lightening speedy birth!

    Loving being a Mom of 3, 40 months apart!!

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