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Thread: Failed first attempt

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    north wales

    Default Failed first attempt

    Hi everyone,
    I've just stumbled upon this site, I wish I knew about all this support when I tried breast
    feeding with my first baby. I lasted four days, I convinced myself I couldn't do it, I didn't realize it was normal for him to feed every 2 hours. I now know he wasn't latched properly ( hence huge blood blisters on my nipples). I've got three sisters and none of them have breast fed their 6 children they advised me that babies are more content with formula, and that he was hungry I got really
    tressed and gave in. I've been reading about breast feeding over the past few weeks and im kicking myself that I didn't try harder.
    My little man has just turned 2 and im now 28 weeks pregnant, im determined to give it another go I love the thought of being able to provide naturally for her. Im looking forward to getting lots of tips and advice from you all.
    Just a quick question in the first few days when your only providing colostrum do you still offer both breast at each feeding?
    Thanks Claire

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2006

    Default Re: Failed first attempt

    Welcome to the forum and congratulations on the baby to come! It's wonderful that you've decided to give breastfeeding a second chance. I'm sorry you didn't get more support the first time around- especially since you needed help with a blistering latch!

    In the first few days, it's really important to offer both breasts every time you nurse. Baby may not take both, particularly if he/she is very sleepy. But the more stimulation your breasts get, and the more often and more completely the baby removes whatever is in there- even if that means just a few ml of colostrum- the faster your mature milk will come in and the more milk you will make.

    Do you have a lactation consultant available to you, preferably an IBCLC? Hopefully your new baby will have a great latch from day one, but if not, it's really good to have professional help as soon as possible.
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  3. #3

    Default Re: Failed first attempt

    Good for you seeking out help and ideas and support! I didn't have the nursing experience I wanted with my firstborn, but I learned from it, looked for decent, trustworthy help (LLL), and was able to go on to nurse twins and another singleton.

    Have you read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding? This is such a wonderful book that portrays the normal course of breastfeeding. It is a really good read, pretty cheap on Amazon, and available at most libraries. Look for the 2010 edition (this is important -- the other editions are great, but not as up-to-date).

    Have you thought of attending a LLL meeting? Going while your pregnant can be invaluable! Meet other moms, hear the calming voice of a LLL leader, hear ideas and reminders about how to get off to a good start.

    Your question about offering both breasts at each feeding. My suggestion is to change your frame of reference away from "feedings". Just nurse your baby! If he is fussy, nurse! If he is happy, see if he wants to nurse! If he is starting to wake up, pop him on! Once I was able to do this -- steering my mind to the breast being part of how I care for my baby all day long, and steering away from "feeding" mentality like a hospital nurse would keep track -- then it stopped mattering how many sides he ate and how often he "fed". I just nursed

    This is particularly important during the first few days after your baby is born because your body is starting to learn how much milk to make. And you're not even making mature milk yet, rather small amounts of the liquid gold, colostrum!

    I will also point out that it is not typical for a newborn to nurse every two hours. Babies just don't usually work like that, and your milk system is not designed to work best that way. Instead, babies nurse in clusters -- every twenty or forty or sixty minutes, three or four times in a row, then they sleep for a 1.5-2 or more hours. (Hopefully more at night, but sometimes not!) So nursing every two hours is not to be expected from a breastfed baby. It helps a lot of moms to instead look at how many times in a 24-hour period their baby is nursing. It's typically 10 to 12 times (or more) in a 24-hour period. Dividing 24 by 12 is where the "every two hours" comes from, but it can be misleading to a mom whose baby just nursed -- that is very, very normal for the baby to nurse again just a short while later and results in proper milk production!! Cluster feeding is the norm, not the rare exception.

    Good luck and you can do this!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2009

    Default Re: Failed first attempt

    Welcome clareroman! I am going to suggest what I suggest to every expecting mother who wants to breastfeed.

    Get and read The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding (8th edition.) Read the first 4 chapters before baby if possible.

    Also before baby, Contact your local La Leche League Leader or other breastfeeding support group and attend a meeting if possible. Your 2 year old would be welcome at LLL meetings.

    Hang out here, lots of great support and information here!

    Maybe ask your family for support that will help you-bringing meals, cleaning the kitchen or bathroom, providing care for your two year old, that kind of thing, so you can devote the early days to nursing and getting to know your new little one. Just tune out or ask them to refrain from making comments comparing breastfeeding and formula feeding.

    Remember that nurses and doctors may have no training or experience whatsoever in supporting breastfeeding mothers. They may be great and helpful, of course. But unfortunately, sometimes mothers are thwarted in their desire to nurse by hospital practices and suggestions (from medical personal, friends, or family) that are not breastfeeding supportive. So it can really help to be as well informed as possible and have breastfeeding knowledgeable support lined up before baby is born.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2013
    north wales

    Default Re: Failed first attempt

    Thank you so much for all the advise. I have ordered the womanly art of breast feeding. I didn't realize that breast fed babies cluster feed so thanks for
    clearing that up I thought Roman (my first baby) was doing that because he wasn't latching properly. I've had an appointment with my midwife and she has booked me on a breast feeding workshop so fingers crossed I will be better equipped this time,
    Thanks again x

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