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Thread: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

  1. #1

    Default help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    Hi everyone,

    I need some advice! I had to stop breastfeeding my 25 mo about 3 weeks ago due to a very painful fungal infection. It was abrupt and very upsetting for both of us. I told my ds that he could start again when my breasts were healed, and this calmed him down a little.

    In the meantime, I have really enjoyed not feeding him (he fed still pretty much on demand, usually only at night, but occasionally during the day). We have found a way for him to fall asleep without feeding, and while he still occasionally shows signs of being more stressed than usual, he also has gone through a massive developmental spurt since.

    I am totally confused about what to do now. I feel I promised him that he could nurse again, and yet, I don't want to go back to feeding him as often as I did. I don't know what to tell him, how to go about respecting my own wishes as well as his needs.

    On top of it all, I feel very torn about stopping entirely!

    Has anyone got any experience with this sort of situation? It was such a sad and painful ending, I would like it to end on a different note, but I also don't want to just go back to where we were before I got ill.

    Please send me your wise words!
    nina

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    9,280

    Default Re: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    If it were me, and I was okay continuing, I would continue offering during the day only and maintain the night-weaned status and not falling asleep on the boob. It might help you feel more rested and still meet your desire to continue nursing.
    Lyn
    Nursing the girl with kaleidoscope eyes


    Mama to Daniel (12/3/06) and Lucy Jane (8/28/08)

  3. #3
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    20,965

    Default Re: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    At 25 months, you can feel free to set whatever sort of nursing limits you need in order to make breastfeeding tolerable for you. That can mean things like no twiddling or no nursing in public or no nursing at night or time limits, etc.

    Was the infection you mentioned thrush? Of so, you may need to treat your LO. It's very common for one member of the nursing pair to be asymptomatic though both are infected and require treatment. I'd hate to see you start nursing again, only to pick up the same infection from your LO's mouth!
    Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
    Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    240

    Default Re: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    has he asked you for it yet? Can you take your cue from that? I do try and keep my promises to my son but sometimes I find that he does not want whatever it is we agreed on. Can you ask him? Asking questions however only make sense if you can live with the answer so it may be safer to offer whatever you are comfortable with. Somehow I think if it were me I would wait to see if he asks me, assuming he noticed you are well again and then offer whatever I feel comfortable with.

  5. #5

    Default Re: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    Thank you for your replies! I have felt strengthened in my wish to draw some boundaries without stopping fully.

    (and YES it was thrush, but both me and my son have been treated and have been symptom free for over 2 weeks now - I had open wounds )

    As an update:
    Today, after a very lovely morning, my son gave me some ginger to eat and said it was "good for my breasts", I answered that my breasts were well again and did he want to breastfeed again - he happily agreed. We made ourselves comfortable, he snuggled up to me, latched on and ... stopped! He laughed and said "NO!" ... I asked him if it wasn't working, and encouraged him to try again - same thing, laughter and No! I said "maybe you are such a big boy now that you don't need the breast any more?" "big child, mama" he said and started doing something else.

    I will offer more feeds, just to make sure, but this could be a pretty-much-wean - I am happy either way.

    Thanks again, and please keep posting your experiences or views!

    nina

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Posts
    240

    Default Re: help! - restarting or not after bf pause due to illness

    o this made me tear up, thank you for sharing this lovely moment!

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