Re: Finding a Balance
The answer is that he cannot physically help you feed the baby. Not right now, anyway. At this point, your DH's job is to support you so that you can master breastfeeding. That means being the gopher. Bringing you snacks and water and pillows. Walking the dog. Cleaning the house. Making meals. Doing the laundry. And above all, he needs to provide emotional support. Have him practice saying the following words: "You are doing an amazing job. You're such a great mommy." He should be saying them frequently, especially during those frustrating intervals.
Let's say your DH gives a bottle right now. What's the potential harm? Well, first of all, it can mess up the baby's latch. Babies latch onto artificial nipples differently from the way they latch onto the breast, and when a baby is just learning to latch onto the breast this difference can reduce their ability and willingness to nurse. Second, any time someone gives a bottle you are going to need to pump in order to maintain your supply. So a bottle given by dad is not a break given to you- it's just an opportunity to hook yourself up to a machine and perhaps screw up your milk supply, which is only just getting established.
So, even though I am sure you DH is eager to participate in the fun of feeding the baby, you need to wait several weeks- most sources say 4-6, or longer if breastfeeding isn't going well- before introducing a bottle into your nursing equation. This doesn't mean there is nothing that dad can do with the baby. He can change diapers. He can sing lullabies. Carry the baby in a sling. And in a few weeks, if you want to introduce a bottle, he can start giving that bottle.
But not right now. Don't let him pressure you into it, no matter how sad his puppy-dog eyes are.
Coolest thing my big girl said recently: "How can you tell the world is moving when you are standing on it?"
Coolest thing my little girl sang recently: "I love dat one-two pupples!"